Cynthiahowardrnphd
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I have worked with transgender and all sorts of "alternative" orientations. I have found that as nurses, we care for people. It never mattered what their orientation was to me or my coworkers. I have found tho "prejudice" against myself for thinking outside of the box and not being willing to gossip or fit into the status quo or because I was white (by non white coworkers and patients) so I really wonder if the object of the prejudice is the issue or just that within the rank of nursing we could do an all around better job of accepting.
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yes, and it is the boomers that rewrote the rules!! You have an amazing career. Thank you for reading and commenting!
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the commuter... indeed you have overcome the stereotype! Thanks for sharing.
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Each generation has it's own defining experience and viewpoint and sees the world through that lens. Think about your workgroup; do you have different generations to contend with? Do you find yourself judging someone because they can't work the weekend or they need reading glasses or have a tattoo or because they don't make eye contact and prefer to text? Is it possible to go beyond the obvious differences and find common ground? After all, you all are nurses and have chosen this profession. Mentoring programs that acknowledge and celebrate differences would go a long way in bridging the gap. Withholding judgment and learning to use active listening to truly understand where someone is coming from will quickly shorten any gap that exists between generations. Can you work this weekend? The "Veteran or Traditionalist Nurse" born between the years of 1925 and 1942 would respond to the question, with "When do you need me?" Growing up during the Depression and WWII taught them to be frugal, work hard, sacrifice and stick it out staying with the same employer. With no exposure to technology, this group is the most resistant to change. This group likes private, face to face conversations. Compare this group to the Millennials, 1980 to 2000, raised in a global society with the technology part of everyday life. Their values include working hard but they want immediate gratification and are noted to be self-indulgent. And if they do not get the validation or feedback they need, they will move on. With social networking woven into the fabric of their being, millennials need to be engaged early on and like short 140 characters "conversations." They would probably respond to the question, "Can you work this weekend" with "I am busy." The largest group of nurses is the Baby Boomers, born between the years of 1943 to 1960. This group's world view was shaped by the equal rights movement, peace and love in the 60's and the Vietnam War. They have a strong work ethic and define themselves by their work. They are the classic overachiever and workaholic. They are most likely to also define others using this standard. They would respond to the question, "Can you work this weekend?" with "It depends on who else is working." The third group of nurses is the Generation Xers born between 1963 and 1980. This group grew up when single-family households were the norm and or both parents worked outside the home. Corporations and organizations were restructuring and layoffs were common. This group grew up on their own for the most part with technology as a big part of their lives. They are a small group in nursing and very often came in as a second career. This group might answer the question, "Can you work this weekend?" with "What's in it for me? Do I get overtime or an extra day off?" In my practice, I work with nurses from all generations and frequently hear complaints about not being heard or understood. Generation Xers really want to be involved in the problem-solving aspect of leadership, they are more independent and entrepreneurial. The Boomers have most of the positions in leadership and may judge the Gen Xers harshly because they have the ability to value their own time - something which is not true for boomers, the ultimate workaholic. Gen Xers want direct communication and short discussions while the boomers like to talk more about things. It is easy to see how one can misjudge behaviors based on the generation you come from. It is important to learn more about each generation to be able to get along. One way to do that is to have a mentoring program where different generations are paired together. A Millennial would be paired with a boomer who would provide technical expertise and a unique viewpoint to the boomer just as the boomer may help to teach patience and critical thinking to the Millennial. It is important to create a culture where differences are respected while the common ground is acknowledged. Each group chose nursing. How they view nursing and their own career is what is different. Very often because boomers are the largest group and they hold most of the leadership positions, they are more likely to "expect" the other generations to "do their time" and resent any fast track growth that is so important for the Millennials. All groups would benefit from a mentoring program where they can accept and recognize differences. Since the beginning of time, each generation feels the next one is lazy or incompetent. Today with 4 different generations coming together it is a great opportunity to close this gap between generations. Each group needs to learn something in the process Millennial's need to learn to spend time with people rather than their machines along with recognizing they do not know it all. Growing up with more praise and attention has created a group more entitled than any other. This means as a mentor to this group, you want to give more continuous feedback and provide opportunities for growth. Gen X grew up like a middle child, on their own and forgotten. They learned that hard work doesn't always pay off and learned work life balance. They are flexible and adaptable and have some trouble acknowledging what they can do to improve. They really need to have leadership opportunities and would greatly benefit from a boomer mentor as long as they are not micromanaged. Boomers can recognize that while they rewrote the rules when they were young and growing up the next generations are doing the same thing in their way. Technology is here to stay and developing a comfort level with technology will enhance their life not burden it. Asking for help to learn technology can be the window into their world. Each group has to reach out to each other to get along. All groups want to feel successful, appreciated and accomplished. If all the groups would learn to actively listen for understanding and stop the knee jerk judgments, there may be a chance at getting along not to mention world peace! References Stokowski, Laura RN, MS, The 4 Generation Gap in Nursing. Nursing Perspectives, Medscape. April 11, 2013. Sherman, Rose EdD, RN, CNAA, Leading a Multi-Generational Nursing Workforce: Issues, Challenges and Strategies, OJIN, vol 11, 2006.
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browneyed girl - find a place you can start talking about these issues and put together a short talk - 10 minutes - it may help you also then with your classes. Start with these short talks. It will give you confidence and also help feed your spirit. High schools, churches, gyms... find places and share your knowledge and desire. Join Toastmasters and you will learn how to put together talks and present well... people there are usually very positive and uplifting.
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Browneyed Girl, thanks for posting and getting honest with yourself. Now you can take some action. Just spend a little time thinking about what you ultimately want? Do you want a different job, promotion, more money, more control over your time, travel? What do you want? Then look at how your everyday choices may be supporting or sabotaging your efforts. Just change one thing - drink more water, decrease sugar... so you will have more energy to go after what you want. Do things you enjoy! If you let yourself have some fun - you will amazed at how rejuvenated you might feel. Whatever you do not not give up! If you need to get a tutor to help you... sending love your way and encouragement to LEAN IN!!!!
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The Commuter, thank you for your honesty. I do relate to you as I had very similar beginning and one day I decided that the pain of resentment was just not where I wanted to live anymore. Please make that decision! It sounds like you have so much to offer the world and it is hidden beneath all this old anger. I love the saying resentment is like taking poison and hoping someone else will die. Thaks for sharing and I hope you will understand that loving and accepting outselves is the fastest way to make the world a better place!
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Gratitude is medicine. It has the power to heal. Numerous studies have been done to reflect the significant changes in mood, attitude and even trips to the physician as a result of a regular practice of gratitude. A $6 million dollar research project was undertaken by The Greater Good Science Center at the University of California, Berkeley along with the University of California, Davis, to explore the science of gratitude. This massive effort resulted in numerous grants being given to explore everything from the changes in gene expression to the changes in relationships to neuroscience to heart disease and more as a result of a regular practice of gratitude. So if gratitude is so great, why is it only talked about at Thanksgiving? Do we really need a holiday to remind ourselves to be grateful? Evidently we do. The problem is that it comes too late in the year and by the time the day rolls around most people are too tired to really make this practice of gratitude part of their day. That is what happened to me. Instead of being grateful, early in my nursing career I lived off of caffeine and the adrenaline rush that came from working in critical care. I loved the technology and the heroic effort required to do my job. That is until one day I had to wait for furniture to be delivered. I thought I would go crazy. I did not have a computer or smart phone. Believe it or not it was before they came out. I had to just wait. I was given a window of 4 hours and of course the delivery came at the end of 4 hours. During that time I realized I was hooked on the fast pace of work and desperately needed to reboot myself so I could learn to live life. This AHA moment helped me to realize that I was missing out on so much of my life because I was always looking forward to the next thing. Anything that happened in the moment was missed. I did not experience the many moments in the day when someone said, "Thank you" for what I did, nor did I recognize those times when someone needed me to just listen. In the whirlwind of saving the world and feeling so important, I lost the ability to be grateful and present. Instead I felt cynical. Sarcastic and a believer in Murphy 's Law that nothing ever turned out OK, I went through each day expecting problems until I had to stop and just be with myself. I did not like being with myself. I am grateful today for hitting this wall and recognizing that life is not best lived at 100 mph. I am grateful to nursing for the holistic framework in which I can view life. It has been decades since I have worked in a clinical setting however in private practice I have considered myself a nurse and love the opportunity to continue to serve others. This is what nursing offers, the opportunity to serve and in doing so to feel a part of something bigger. Before burnout, it was all about me and what I was doing. Having come face to face with the ugly truth of what I had become, I can now say I am grateful for burning out. It was at that point I had the chance to reclaim that part of me I lost along the way.