Hey there! I posted something very similar today. I graduated May 2016, and went straight to the OR. The last 8 months I've been at a surgery center. I am so tired of feeling like a gopher as well! It seems as though the CRNA is the "nurse" in the room. I have spent a few days in pre-op and it was a TON of paperwork, but more patient interaction. I'm actually PRN right now. Considering getting into something different on the side PRN to just see what else I might like. It is true that as your confidence grows, you will feel like you have more ground to speak up. I love the no call, no weekends, and no holidays. Stay in surgery for at least a year, just to show dedication. Try a surgery center too, I like it much better than the hospital. I'm feeling torn too, you're not alone! Good luck!