I understand what your talking about. I had a boss that was passive aggressive....eventually I chose to leave the job, but not just for that reason. It wasn't until I was at a new job with a healthy, supportive boss that I understood how I was being treated. I thought she was a horrible manager and wrote it up to her lack of ability. But after I gave my resignation, her sickness was evident. I played the game, stroked her ego, and made working out my notice as pleasant as possible. I feel for you. And I do think unless you have been targeted by someone like this, it is a difficult situation to explain or understand. The things that happen to you are so underhanded and subtle, you question your own sanity. I can say the experience has allowed me to appreciate having a skilled manager and a healthy work environment.