Lindalou76

Well here is my 2 cents, I don't think my daughter will see me as a "quitter"...I think she will see that I love her enough to put her needs in front of my own, no exceptions. Like you said you're not a wife or a mother so I don't see how you could possibly understand the choice I had to make. Everyone has different priorities in life and thats ok, but it's also ok to put your family in front of your career! My family is forever, my career is not. Obviously your mother was a single mom and I give her credit for being able to get through nursing school to support her family because that is what she had to do, but there is no financial need for me to do this right now so I see no harm in putting it aside until my daughter is older and doesn't want so much of my time. And I give credit to the women who can swing it all: work, family & school, but I am not one of those people, no matter how hard I tried I could not find balance and my daughter was starting to suffer. Education is always available, just because there could be a little wait does not worry me, because if it's meant to be then it will be. The part of your post that offends me is when you say "They'll grow up and see that you were not a quitter." Well I don't think putting nursing school off to make sure my daughters needs are met makes me a quitter, I think it makes me a wonderful mother and that is more important to me than any degree I could ever earn!

Thank you for all the support! I'm was sitting here this morning a little sad because I'm usually in class at this time, but reading all your posts have made me feel so much better. I know I've made the right decision, I can see it in my little girls eyes when she realizes that I'm not studying, I'm going to play with her instead! lol I'm only about 4 classes from finishing up my Associate in Arts, so I think i'm going to do that through online courses for now and then when she's older I will possibly try to pursure nursing again. Thanks again, I really appreciate all the responses I've received!

It is so sweet at night to be able to spend time with my family again instead of stressing out trying to get my homework done. Again, i'm disappointed that I won't get to be a nurse as soon as i had planned, but heck I'm only 32 and my daughter is only young once and school will always be there! I'll make it back eventually....I know it's in my future so I'm just gonna focus on me & my family for now and enjoy life! lol Thanks for your comment :) Linda

Well I am no longer a nursing student. I had to walk away. I'm sure people will say i'm crazy because i didn't fail, was actually passing all my classes, I just couldn't do it. I don't know if it just wasn't for me or if it's just bad timing but I went into clinicals on Wednesday morning and the anxiety was horrible! I went through the morning meeting and everything, had done my care plan the night before and was fine. But i walked to my pt's room and I just couldn't make myself go in. I was frozen with anxiety/fear/stress don't know for sure, but I just couldn't do it. So i went and talked to my instructor and she was great, told me that she actually went to school for 4 yrs with some girls who totally got their degree and just could'nt do nursing. Made me feel slightly better that I was figuring it out early on. SHe did say she thought I'd make a great nurse and that when I was ready to come back that the school would still be there and that i could come talk to her. I think alot of my problem was i was just too stressed out and couldn't get my time magaged between my home life and school life. My child is only 5 and still wants ALOT of my time and i feel guility not giving it to her. We're very close and I've always be able to give her my all. And i was neglecting my marriage as well and what good will it do me to get my degree and be a nurse if it means ignoring my child & husband and my marriage suffers? While in school i just wasnt the person i wanted to be, always stressed out, getting snappy with my child & hubby cause i had so much homework or studying to do and they wanted to spend time with me and I just couldn't do both! lol My husband supported me no matter what decision i made, and we had talked about it for a few weeks and for whatever reason Wednesday morning i just chose to walk away. I'd like to give it another shot when my daughter is much older and doesn't want so much of me. Since i walked away i have to say i'm 100% stress free, i feel wonderful. I am disappointed in myself because i couldn't "do it all" but i know my limits and i knew i was crossing them and i was really suffering (emotionally & starting to physically as well) so i just had to do what i felt best. I wish you all the best! Take my advice and manage your time from day 1 and don't get so far buried you can't get out like i did! lol Thanks for all the support that you all gave me while i was briefly a nursing student! Linda

Well I did it. I survived my 1st real day of clinical!!!!! It was scary but I got through it and i am proud of myself! I only have 9 days left (2 days per week for 5 weeks) in the long term care facility so I think I can make it! I'm off to work on my careplan, what a headache! Thanks for all the support!!!

You have to do what's right for you.....but at the same time you've got to take his feelings and needs into consideration as well. Stress can cause ALOT of issues in a relationship and you have to decide if you're willing to take the chance that it could cause irreversable damage to your relationship. You don't want to resent him if you don't go to school, but you don't want him to resent you because you choose to go back either. I don't want to be negative, but it's a possibility. Maybe you two can come up with some ways to make it easier on both of you next go round with school. Could you possibly only work part-time or not work at all? Could you possibly get a part-time nanny or family member to help out a bit with the kids? It's going to be a very hard decision for you to make, I can see so many pro's & con's on both sides. Good luck to you!

I started ns in August and it has been a major rollercoaster ride. From trying to stay on top of the reading (impossible for me), trying to pass check-offs, and now starting clinicals (which terrify me) i'm getting really sick of this darn ride! lol Luckily all my instructors are wonderful, it's just me letting alot of fear & self-doubt in the door and i start to spiral down and start to feel like i can't do it. I've never been so stressed in my life as i have the last 2 months, my diet has went out the window (lost 20 lbs over the summer) cause i feel like if i monitor my diet on top of everything else that i may literally crack! I've had more zits in the last 2 months then i think i've had my entire life! lol My house stays a disaster and we eat more take out than home cooked meals and i hate that but i'm just too tired or too busy trying to study to get dinner cooked most days. lol The stress is really killing me, the anxiety gets worse the closer i get to clinicals and there are days where i just want to quit so i can have some relief. I keep hoping if i can just make it through this first semester that i will start to have more confidence about making it to the end. Oh, i've never been a "c" student until now, but my philosophy is i'm passing so i'll take it! lol So many people in my class don't seem stressed at all so it's nice to come here and see that many others are feeling the same way i am :) Ok, there's my 2 cents. I better go because i have a test tomorrow, then 2 check-offs tomorrow (physical assessment & NG tube) and 1 check-off on Tuesday (catherter's) and then clinicals on Wednesday & Thursday which i'm totally unprepared for and scared to death of! lol

I know i'm freaking myself out about this, i just can't help but feel i'm not qualified to have a patient. I don't even have all my skills down! I guess maybe before clinical I can make some big notecards to put in my pockets on how to properly do procedures and if/when i get lost i can kinda glance at them to see what else i need to do. I'm very much a "list" person. I know i should stop stressing, i'm not gonna be totally alone, my classmate is totally willing to help me with my pt and i'm gonna help her with her pt. Our instructor even told us to "buddy-up". And worse case scenario i will just find my instructor and beg for her help and tell her i just can't do it on my own. She's very very nice i just don't want her to be annoyed by my over neediness (is that a word? lol). I'm just having so much anxiety over this, i'm breaking out in zits and possibly working on an ulcer from so much worrying....lol. I'm glad to hear from several of you that this is normal though, i don't feel like a total loser now. I'm hoping to pull myself together by Wednesday and just tell myself to suck it up and get through the day and once I see that i can make it through the day maybe my confidence will come back and i'll survive. lol I've got to at least try...I spent over a year doing pre-req's (BIO 100, CHM 100, BIO 210, BIO 211) and spent oodles of money (well over $2000 out of my pocket for tuition, books, supplies, uniforms etc, just for this semester) to just walk away. I just hate fear & self-doubt, it creeps in and starts to take over. I've just got to find the strength to tell it to go away! Thanks again ladies, I will repost at the end of the week to let you know if i survived!!! lol

Well we're basically expected to do everything on our patient's this week that we've done in skill lab in the last 2 months (NG tubes, tube feedings, catheters, bed-baths, total physical assessments, wound care, ambulating patient's, all vital signs (I am so afraid my patient's skin will tear just from putting the cuff on tight enough to get a BP reading, i tried the other day but couldn't finish cause she started moaning and it scared me cause i thought i might hurt her) and administering meds (this is the one thing the instructors will be right beside us for, but nothing else really). Obviously, if we have issues they will come help us, but they won't hold our hand at all! I really need my hand held the first day or two so that is the problem i'm having. I'm just really starting to think nursing is not for me. I thought it was because i love people of all ages, and i like to help people but i may have a problem doing the really invasive or sensitive stuff like catheters, breast exams during physical assessments (mainly because my pt can't talk and i would really feel like i'm violating her, I can just imagine her looking up at me like "what are you doing to me"), etc. I think I would feel different if for the first few days we were shadowing a nurse or having an instructor with us showing us exactly what to do and then having us do it, but that's just not how it is so i'm am really taken off-gaurd by this. I'm thinking maybe I didn't think long enough or research nursing enough before making a decision to start nursing school. I'm more embarrassed than anything that i will have to tell my instructors, friends and family that i just don't think i'm cut out for this. Well see what the week brings. I think i'm going to talk to my advisor on Monday, then my clinical instructor and just go from there, but right now i don't have very high hopes. Kinda sucks i'm doing so well in the class, havn't failed anything..........i think clinicals are just too soon for me. I'm still praying there's a chance I'll get through this week and look back on this and laugh, but i'm trying to be realistic too. Thanks to anyone who took the time to respond, i appreciate you trying to encourage me and get me out of this funk! lol

Thanks for the replies. I may have to go talk to someone on Monday if I don't feel any better. I already feel the downward spiral starting and am wanting to flee the situation and don't know if i can stop it. I'm not sure if i should talk to my clinical instructor or my advisor (both are great ladies). I don't want to sound like a whiny student to them but this is truly how i'm feeling and i just feel like i want to quit. I just don't have the confidence that i can give good quality care this week in the nursing home and that frightens me alot! If i could follow someone around for a day or two and watch them do the skills i think i could do it and feel better, but we have to do it our first day and that's that. My patient is very fragile and can barely speak and the thought of me giving her a breast exam during the physical assessment makes me feel like i'm violating her! I know that probably sounds silly, but that is how i am feeling. It's one thing seeing all these skills in the book and then performing them on mannequin's but doing them on real people is really freaking me out!!!!!!!! I'm really embarrassed to go to my instructor and/or advisor but i'm scared if i don't go talk to them that i'm just not gonna show up to clinical out of straight fear. Am i crazy? Am i not cut out to be a nurse? I just don't know what to do........ Any advice is greatly appreciated!!!!!!!! thank you!

We're not working with nurses at all. There are 7 of us and we have 1 instructor. She's is VERY nice and will help us in anyway and is not the type of instructor to leave you on your own. We are only doing simple things like bed bath's, wound care, tube feedings and most ADL's I just feel like I can't remember how to do anything now that we're going to have to do it "for real". lol I mean we've only been in class for like 2 months....just seems too soon to me!!!!!! I'm going to watch all my skill video's again and I'm hoping that will give me a little more confidence. Also, my client doesn't really talk, she is not in good condition at all. Very fragile, i was scared to death to even take her bp, but i did take her pulse today so i did get something accomplished even though it was something simple. I actually enjoyed being in the long-term care facility today, and i just love people (especially older people because they are so excited to receive the attention)........i'm just scared to do my nursing duties since this will be the real deal. If i could watch a nurse or CNA do them first i think i would feel better, but since we should know what to do we're not really given any kind of demonstration. I guess i'm just thinking about it too hard. I will watch my skills video's and just do my best next week. My instructor knows i'm very nervous and if i need help i know she will help me. I also have a partner who said she will drag my a** through this clinical if she has too! lol We're gonna help eachother get through this so i guess i just need to have a little faith! Thanks for the response, you made me feel a little better! I'm going to read some more posts on here cause that always makes me feel better too.......:wink2:

We had our clinical orientation at the Long-term Care Facility and we start tending to clients next week and I just don't feel ready. Practicing skills in lab on "dummies" is one thing....doing them to real people is another story. Everytime i think about it i go blank and can't remember what to do! I'm really scared and have been doubting my career choice all day wondering if i've made the right decision and what will my instructor say if i just stand there and can't make myself move to do what i need to do. I feel so conflicted right now. I'm doing fine in the classes, though i don't feel like i'm really retaining much info. I test and then move on and it's hard for me to recall alot of stuff from previous chapters. I just don't feel like I know what I need to know to actually be on the floor. Is this normal? Has anyone else had these same feelings? Does it go away? For instance I understand how to do a NG tube and/or a catheter....but doing it on a real person terrifies me! I keep telling myself I only have 10 clinical days and surely I can get through this, right???? lol I'm just so unsure of my capabilities right now and I really hate feeling this way.

I wasn't able to reply to the message you sent to my inbox for some reason me so I'm going to reply here and try to answer all the questions you asked..... Yes, I live in Sumter so I am close to the school. This is my 2nd week of classes and we've gone everyday from 8:30 until 12 or 1 or 2, just depends on the day. But in another week or so we will go down to only going Monday-Thursday, no Fridays! Clinicals will start in October. The schedule varies, I know clinicals start at your clinical location at like 6:45am, you could possibly do clinicals in Columbia though cause i know they have them in places other than Sumter like Florence, Manning & Camden, so maybe they would have them there as well? During the semester sometimes classes are out at noon and sometimes you're there till 4pm or so....it just depends on the day really and what all they have planned. But the very first day of class we got our schedule for the whole semester, so right now I know pretty much what my hours will be until the semester is over in December! I don't know where my clinicals are at yet, but should know soon. You don't get to pick, but you can tell them where you prefer to be. I applied in January and in April I received a denial letter, but then 1 month later i received an acceptance letter because more spots opened up. Hope some of this helps! Let me know if you have anymore questions and i will try to answer them! Linda

I just started my 1st semester of nursing at Central Carolina Tech. I'm in the ADN program and will graduate in May '10.

I've heard it's like a 2 year wait once you finish your prerequisites and get on the wait list. I don't know if there's any exceptions to that or not.