newmomRN

Hi nurses! I have a question for ya! I graduated in May of 2007 and passed NCLEX in July of 2007. I got pregnant unexpectedly right when I graduated but did start my first job, on a med surg floor. Due to stress and then complications of pregnancy I left that job after only 1 month. I went on to miscarry that child but got pregnant very soon after and gave birth to a healthy baby girl! :yeah:Since then I have worked very part time in another field (couldn't cut my hours as a new grad in nursing) just to make ends meet while staying at home with my daughter. I wanted to stay at home longer with her but money is tight and I am also afraid that I won't be employable if I wait much longer (too much time will pass). Question is.....when I start applying for jobs, do you think I should mention my leave of absence to in my cover letter or just leave it as a reason for leaving that first job? In addition, do you feel that I now need a refresher course to re-enter nursing after being out for over a year?? And finally...do you think I even have a chance?? Thanks for any advice you can give me! NewMom RN

I am a new grad that quit my first RN job after one month due to "stress". I had severe anxiety r/t the normal pressures of being a new RN but also had some recent family tradgedies contributing to my negative emotional state. My old employer was disappointed but did add that I had been doing well. Anyhow, I realize the error of my ways now and have been job searching. I have an offer at another facility but all around this facility does not look as good as my old employer/facility. Of course, this is just a gut instinct so far, since I only have the interview to go on. They did offer me a position but I am torn. I had no real issues with my old employer, the hospital in general was a great place to work, I think I just freaked as a new grad and made an impulsive and poor decision. Everyone was friendly and helpful. Question is this: would you pursue going back to the old position before you accepted the new offer at the new facility? I figure because I have been somewhat oriented there, know the charting, etc, and because I had been doing well that there may be a chance I could come back but I am very worried that my reputation would be flawed. That my "bed would be made", for lack of a better expression. I don't know if they would be understanding or if everyone would just think I was a quitter...Should I go where no one knows my name or try to go back where I got a little experience? TIA!

Is it OK to buy a thank you card from Walgreens or whatever (card style--maybe with a nice "thank you" written in gold lettering-nothing tacky) and write on the inside, handwritten???? would this be sufficient without breaking out with the stationary I don't have????

OK or NOT OK?? I tried searching online but the opinions run the gamut. This would be for an RN position in a large hospital system. Thanks!

Just wanted to say THANK YOU MODS FOR NOT MOVING THIS THREAD. YOU GUYS ROCK!! Updated to say that I did decide to be straight up with them. They were a bit confused/suprised but it was just a blip in the interview. Then they showed me the floor so maybe that is a good sign?! So now I am off to write my Thank you letters. Thanks everyone for responding so quick!

MODS..please don't move this. I have just one question and need responses today. Pretty please??? Here goes: I had another thread about leaving a job off resume I had only had for one month (it was recent, RN job, new grad). I know now I should include it and will in future applications. That said, before I already submitted a resume to an employer and got called for an interview TOMORROW! The position is for nights, not even sure if I want it then, but still..I am afraid that if I go to the interview and get hired they will run a background check and find the job. If that happens, and they decide not to hire me, I am afraid I will be forever banned from that hospital system. Or I guess they could have already ran the background check...but unlikely until they make an offer. I was thinking I could bring an updated resume and give it to the interviewer stating I just forgot to update it but that would ruin me too I am sure. Is there any fixing this?? I don't want to ruin my chances of ever being employed at this hospital system. Should I just cancel the interview saying I was offered a day position somewhere else and wait a bit to reappy or go anyway? I don't want to be labeled a liar but don't know how to fix what I've done.

Some of you may remember me. I was a new grad and pregnant a few months ago. Now, I am no longer pregnant. Sadly, I lost the baby. When I posted before it was over concerns that newly pregnant + stress from working as a new RN would harm baby. So I quit my job. Several weeks later found out I miscarried and did not know it. Fast forward to now. Now I realize that the odds of stress harming the baby were very small, that it was nature's plan. I also feel dumb for quitting my job simply because now I realize that it was impulsive and that there is no getting around the stress of being a new RN. I just have to find ways of dealing with it if I want to get in at leat one years experience at the bedside. I can't let what I perceive to be overwhelming stress get the best of me. That may mean meds, therapy, working part time, I just don't know but I am working on it. So......I am trying to look at all of this with a different perspective. There is part of me that wants to be an RN, wants to succeed, and KNOWS that the only way to relieve the stress is through it. I HAVE to get experience to build confidence!! That said, I am applying for jobs. Do I or do I not include my first RN job I just quit? I have heard that HR has ways of checking and will find out if you don't include it...I feel really embarrassed about it now. I could be honest and include it but the reason I quit doesn't really look good or acceptable (I don't think) since all people have problems/stress/tragedies. Plus, I don't want to go into gory detail about the pregnancy, cuz I don't think that looks good either. I only worked a little over one month. What should I say about it if I do include it? Also.....I was hired on nights previously but moved to days d/t being pregnant but do you think nights would be more suitable for someone with high anxiety? I frown on taking a night job d/t it messing up my whole rhythm (and in case I decided to get prengnant again) but if I was less stressed it could be worth it. If I chose nights I would delay another pregnancy at least for 6 months and most likely pursue meds for anxiety. Thank you for any help!

Hi all, Well, I royally messed up here! In a stressed panic, I quit my job after a little over one month (they weren't too happy, but OK). Three weeks later I found out I miscarried my baby at 12 weeks. Now I am jobless (I am employed but it is not in nursing) and feel stupid for putting all my eggs in one basket. I realize now that quitting was dumb and it was a very implusive decision. Now I have issues because I have done this before. When I was in school I got an extern job that didn't suit me, I didn't really like it but then one of my family members got ill (and died eventually) and I got super stressed. Then I just couldn't handle the job on top of my other part time job. I quit via interfacility EMAIL (I worked another job there). I know that was super bad but I just couldn't face my manager, couldn't tell him I wasn't happy (or so I thought at the time) and super stressed. Same thing with this job I posted about. I just FREAKED OUT. On a larger scale, of course, lol. It is like I go into panic mode and get tunnel vision or something. Like my anxiety gets so high and then I can't deal with reality anymore... Being pregnant SEEMED like a good excuse to quit (or so I thought-not so much now, eh?) but I guess it wasn't the reason, it just sounded good to me, a justification. This is either an emotional problem with me or it is just that nursing is too stressful of a field for me and my personality. But now that I am no longer pregnant I feel stupid not getting out there and getting experience. I feel stupid for thinking that I could cut stress and increase my chances of a healthy pregnancy. Yeah, right...I applied for a few jobs but didn't put my last job on my resume or the extern job which now, after reading posts on here, looks like a major mistake??? I just don't know how to explain quitting both jobs due to emotional stress. I mean, everyone has family members die and crisis in their life but you can't just let the stress overtake you and quit jobs. So I know there is no excuse for it and I am actively trying to fix this problem but what do I do now??? In the future I can include these jobs on my resume----because I did get clinical experience----but I guess I might be SOL with the jobs I just applied for. Am I ruined in nursing? I don't even know how to explain myself. I don't want to explain why I quit my last job--being pregnant---cuz that'll just dig me a bigger whole. Help! I am not sure I like nursing, but I see the first year as a necessary evil now. After that, I can drop down to part time, PRN, POOL, whatever. And maybe something will grow on me along the way. Thank you to all who helped me before. Thought you'd be interested in this update and thought you might be able to advise now.

I am not sure I would not use my degree in any capacity if I were to leave, but I really don't know how to use my degree. I know that for most of the jobs you all are pointing out, you need atleast one yr clinical experience..of which, I obviously don't have. It is not that I don't enjoy working with people, I don't really like being so "up close and personal". Social work doesn't seem so bad. Talking, being involved, but not being the one to do the pericare, you know? I looked at this place: www.healthdialog.com but not really sure what that is all about since they don't make it too clear on their site, but it looks more like me. Being a health coach looks really neat too, as one of my passions is fitness and health. It almost seems like being a health coach would require some acute care experience too though..Working in a weight loss clinic would be lots of fun! I would like to be more on the paper/insurance side of things, more at a computer than a bedside. If I were to leave my acute care job now, I would look into other things, and I would keep my license active. I just don't know if I have it in me right now to push through that new grad stressful 1st yr of floor nursing, just because I HAVE TO. Seems like a death sentence. One that may be worth it after I have the baby, but I just don't want to do it now. I do have the degree, so not all is lost. I know there are many threads here about what to do if you don't want to work at bedside. I will look into them as well. I just feel sooo guilty! Thanks for the kind words.

Ok, wasted is a strong word. I did finish, I do have the degree, I do have options. But.. Here I sit, my first RN job ever and newly pregnant, and finally realize 100% that nursing is not for me. In fact, it never was for me. I just kept letting my head override my heart. And I never trusted my gut instinct. I never trusted myself and, as usual, looked to everyone else to tell me what to do and make my decisions for me. I have had these feelings for a long time but was unable to go one way or another because I had so many differing opinions from those I asked advice. There were always people there exclaiming the pros, still others reminding me about the cons. So I just stayed in limbo. I went through school excited to learn new things..but that was about it. Not excited to help people. Not excited about being so up close and personal to people. Never felt like I was making a difference..I spent clinical days counting minutes to the end of the day. I pushed and pushed to get through. And I did. But that is exactly what it was, PUSHING. Fast forward to now, my first job, and it feels just like clinical. I watch the clock at work and there is nothing I enjoy doing. I just kept telling myself all through school I would find my niche, it would be different in the "real world" of nursing. But all it is is WORSE. As a nurse you are EVERYTHING...the social worker, the dietician, the housekeeper, the psychiatrist, the doormat...seeing the big picture it no longer seems worth it. Add on to that pregnancy hormones and discontinuing my mood stabilizer and everything is wacko. But strangely, I feel a sort of peace that maybe I am finally able to admit that maybe I just made a mistake. I feel stupid in front of my family but all I can say is I am sorry, right? I guess I never would have known FOR SURE unless I had went for it, I have to look at it that way. My previous job before NS really was going nowhere anyway.. I feel an excitement to walk away from hands on care, never put in another IV, start another foley. Not be the one responsible for EVERTHING! I guess if you truly feel that way it was never meant to be. I was trying to push through the first year, you know, to get experience. But is there a point if the field is not for you and you don't enjoy what you are doing. No, if you HATE what you are doing? My thoughts now are to just cut my ties, pass my NCLEX, but stay working at my non clinical hospital job. It pays much less, but to be honest, the wage of an RN hardly seems worth the stress either. I don't want to spend my first pregnancy unable to take breaks, pee, or even eat lunch. I don't want to feel stressed ALL THE TIME. And I don't know if there is any area of nursing that is not like this.?? Anyway, I am rambling really. Don't know where to go from here, other than find a way to make ends meet, try to be less stressed, and enjoy being pregnant as much as I can. I guess I am not a failure because I did learn much about myself in school and can finally say I don't want to be a nurse. I just don't know how I am going to proceed from here. Quitting while still in orientation is sure going to be hard. I guess all I can do is apologize, really. They will probably think I am just new grad stressing though, don't really know how I will explain it was all one big mistake.. I found this site that describes how we wind up on the wrong career path. Basically everything I have been telling myself for two years. http://www.employmentspot.com/features/WhyWeWindUpOnTheWrongCareerPathAndWhatToDoAboutIt.htm

So need some help here.. .....graduated NS, waiting to take boards, landed a job, nights (I am less than thrilled about that, but it was all I could get). I still have my old job, a pool non nursing position at a local hospital. I haven't quit that one yet, I was thinking of keeping it "just in case" the RN position didn't work out or nights didn't treat me well, since I have never worked nights (again NOT looking forward to that:lol2: ). In true new grad fashion, I have been experiencing overwhemling anxiety r/t beginning my new career and switching to nights, and I know some of this is normal. Now today, found out I am PG, my first PG. I have benefits under my husband, I don't need to work full time for us to pay bills, so we could survive on my pool position. Also, my new job won't offer my maternity leave that soon so my job won't be secured if I decide to take time off. I just began general orientation last week and am scheduled for my first day on the unit next Wed, so total days employed is 4 so far. So....what to do? I am already max stressed, not looking forward to a night position AND dealing with 1st tri probs. Also...need to focus on passing boards, so I'll have that stress too for now. Still have my other job, can work as many or as little hours as I want, when I want. I know as long as I pass NCLEX and get my license that I will be OK to postpone working as an RN till after the baby is born. Would that be bad? Would employers look down on me for that? I worry that I would lose all my knowlege.. But how horrible would it be to go to my manager in my new job and tell her about the PG, aplogize, and decline the position now? In my mind, better to be strait up and tell her before she begins orienting me than be secretive and misleading? I would want time off around when the baby comes and I won't have maternity leave yet... My fear is just that I'll begin working, have to quit my old job, be totally stressed, not be sleeping, and then get sick or have comps of PG, and have to take time off, etc.....should I just stay with my same old, same old for now?? If I am strait up with my manager, do you think I would be eligible for rehire? Seems like they would want me to quit sooner rather than later, right? I may be moving out of state within the next few years anyway so to be honest I don't even know if I need to keep that hospital as a future option.. There have been other threads about this exact situation but the others either had to work full time or did not have bennies. Not the case with me so your advice may be different.... Any advice you can give would be greatly appreciated! (especially all you nurse managers..how would YOU feel?!) jo jo