kellie

Oh goodness, I work in a geriatric psychiatric unit, and there are so many stories to tell... id have to narrow it down to these 2. We had one very demented lady who used to hoard things in her clothing, and hair, and was constantly mumbling nonsense. Well, it was shower time and I noticed something coming from in between her legs. I got out some napkins,and a pencap. When I noticed there was more, I had to get my charge nurse. Now, keep in mind this is a very large older woman who was screaming and yelling the entire time. It took 3 of us to get the rest out ( 2 to hold her down, 1 to dig) We got a p-nut butter and jelly sandwich out of her lady parts.Who knows how long it had been there, but it didn't smell pretty. Another horror story was more from an ex-coworker than a patient. It was an older man who was schizophrenic, and had a bad case the poops. He had pooped all in his bed and attempted to clean himself up. He only managed to smear himself in feces and make an even bigger mess. I don't know what he was thinking, but he put everything he owned, and everything his roommate owned in the pile of feces. Then he placed the pile on his sleeping roommate. Thank God this roommate did not wake up. The man then ran across the hall and tried to hide next to a ladys bed. The woman came to our station and stated " There's a naked man on the floor next to my bed". Now, this woman had a new complaint every night, so we did not take her seriously. We told her there was no man, and to go back to bed. She insisted, so I went to look , and found our man who stated "Angelo had an accident." Now, his roommate was not named Angelo, so we still had no clue what was going on. And then my ex-coworker emerged from the mans room with the steaming pile of clothes, magazines, bed linens, etc.etc. and dragged it down the hall. The smell was something I have never smelled before, and never want to. We cleaned the man up, and sent him to bed. But my ex-coworker... now any ordinary person would have probably just thrown the horribly dirtied linens away. But she had them in a sink, and was scrubbing them out with her bare hands. My charge nurse saw her doing this and came running to the desk. He then told me " Hey Kellie, why dont you go see if J. needs a hand?" I went to what he was talking about...and OMG! That's something we all laughed about for so long.