Summershores

thank you Karen and LM. i guess i was just wanting someone to confirm to me that i would be right to step in and report this. It will make my MIL mad at me, but better me than anyone else in the family who is blood related and better that shes mad than hurt in some way. She is moving into a house with her carer and i dont like the way shes being moved from family and friends. I worry she will see noone but this carer for days at a time. If anyone knows about english procedures could they let me know? but if not, i now feel i can bring this to the attention of social services or someone, justifiably and not just as an over paronoid person (which i probably am). thank you

i get grossed out by genital warts. I had a patient that wanted hers washed constantly because they were sore. of course i cleaned her but my god!! it was nasty lol

its definatly not a "friend" relationship. there is a lot of dependance between the two and an extreamly strong emotional tie. My mother in law is leaving her husband and has broken of contact with her children in favour of her carer. The family were close and this carer appears to have systematilcally broken the relationships in the family with the mother in law. It might or might not be of conciquence but this is a female carer. and im not homophobic but this situation is seriously weird

Thank you all for you comments. I have spoken to the family and the only person not worried about this is my MIL. It's just that know one knows what to do.

i just want to make sure that i dont have to report it to someone. i dont want to be accused of neglect of duty should this all go pear shaped. my mother is fairly old and the carer is young, and money is vanishing from her account. The family think shes giving it to the carer, but its her money so her business but i am conserned.

the patient is my mother in law

i have become aware of a difficult situation and would appreciate some feed back on the view of what i should do, if anything about the situation. its fairly long winded but i would appreciate any advice. (sorry about the spelling) The patient is a married women with physical disability of walking long distances due to an acident years ago. Her husband works long hours as finantually they are not well off. She needs carers three times aday to help with personal cares. A spacific carer started looking after her 1 year ago and they became good friends. The carer left her husband and moved in with her patient and her family and stoped caring for the patient on a perminant level, doing personal cares only when the agency could not get anyone else due to shortness of staff. The husband was grateful as being away at work he was concerned that his wife would get lonely. However it has come to my attention that the carer is sharing a bed with the patient nightly. The husband got suspisions and accused his wife of having an affare with the carer ( although he did later appologies he says he still feels something is wrong with the relationship between his wife and her carer). The patient says she could never forgive her husband for saying such a thing and is devorsing her husband. The husband is angry and feels the carer has abused trust. there is a 30 year age gap between the carer and patient and the husband is confused as to what to do if the carer leaves his wife to persue a relationship. The patient and carer deny a sexual relationship but they sleep nightly together in a single bed and the patient does not like to go anywhere without her carer. This is basically it and i dont know what to do, if anything. I dont think what has happened is right but i dont know where i stand in this situation. Please help