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Dear Nurse, I am so sorry this happened to you-I agree with the other one's that you need to be very kind to yourself-ask for a meeting to help you make choices for your next job-it does sound like that it was a bad fit-look for a hospital that has at least 12 week orientation program and a support system for new grads-usually larger hospitals-when you interview for next job, honestly tell what happend and that you learned from it. As one nurse said, if you live in an employment at will state, like mine-it is more difficult-if this is the case the employer just tells the next employer that you worked there from x day to y date-. Yes, you are expected to know about your patients--however you can always look information up in a book or the chart etc. I think the person that suggested that how you present yourself might be the problem-perhaps get some short term counseling, if you can-you will both learn from this and you will get a better job, that is a better fit-and that you will be happy and fulfilled in. go somewhere that is relaxing to you-the beach or the mountains or a lake and write down your feelings and what went wrong-then armed with this, ask for the meeting to get feedback-if you are near your school of nursing, maybe go to one of your trusted faculty and ask for assistance, both in job search and in finding out the dynamics of what caused this. You may find out that this is known as a place that eats their young!! Good luck and you will find the right place to work, and later you will respond to another nurse in a forum like this and help that person from what you learned.

Dear Nurse, I am so sorry this happened to you-I agree with the other one's that you need to be very kind to yourself-ask for a meeting to help you make choices for your next job-it does sound like that it was a bad fit-look for a hospital that has at least 12 week orientation program and a support system for new grads-usually larger hospitals-when you interview for next job, honestly tell what happend and that you learned from it. As one nurse said, if you live in an employment at will state, like mine-it is more difficult-if this is the case the employer just tells the next employer that you worked there from x day to y date-. Yes, you are expected to know about your patients--however you can always look information up in a book or the chart etc. I think the person that suggested that how you present yourself might be the problem-perhaps get some short term counseling, if you can-you will both learn from this and you will get a better job, that is a better fit-and that you will be happy and fulfilled in. go somewhere that is relaxing to you-the beach or the mountains or a lake and write down your feelings and what went wrong-then armed with this, ask for the meeting to get feedback-if you are near your school of nursing, maybe go to one of your trusted faculty and ask for assistance, both in job search and in finding out the dynamics of what caused this. You may find out that this is known as a place that eats their young!! Good luck and you will find the right place to work, and later you will respond to another nurse in a forum like this and help that person from what you learned.

Good morning, I happened to see this this morning-I have a story that will empower you-I have been a nurse 30 years-this year I moved back to a hospital I used to work in-where old friends are-in one area I was "nailed to the cross" which consisted of being told you were incompetent, could do nothing right-I was fired, but could come back-I wrote letter to vp nursing-and got to come back in inpatient area-I have a master's in this field-things were going well for 3 months-one week, I had a couple of errors-I was asked to come in early to work and I was fired-they had a typed up form with some things on it-I left and took the weekend to think it through and called wanting a meeting-it was refused-I agonized for really about a month on what to do-found a good lawyer-employment lawyer, who said to file a complaint with eeoc-age discrimination-wrongful termination-they also tried to deny unemployment-I appealed-at the phone hearing-a real judge made them admit that they did nothing until the day they fired me and reversed the denial of unemployment and stated that I was fired for reasons other than mis-conduct-at this meeting I was allowed to tell about the nailing to the cross and age discrimination and the eeoc complaint-the manager of inpatient filed a complaint to the board of nursing-which was really goofy-I admited to the mistakes, in our state the board of nursing has set up a program for things like this-called consent to practice agreeement-I took a test that proved that I had no mental illness as the manager tried to say. I submitted the unemployment file to the board of nursing, along with letters from nurses and doctors. The eeoc has issued a "right to sue"-which I will follow through and have the evidence now-I have been proven right-I tried to get meeting and work through this-the manager refused-eeoc added extra charges-denial of due process etc. hopefully your manager isn't as stupid as this one-but as the other people have said-never talk to her alone-go up the chain of command-talk to HR, see if there is a retention nurse, if there is you can tell her-especially the part about that she only had a short time to humiliate you--ask for a meeting with HR and the manager-have your facts together-also if you have an EAP program talk with them-one place I worked, I found out when I was sick and needed their help to get through an illness, that I had been the only person who reported to this director who wasn't seeing EAP--this is probably the case-the EAP person helped with strategies-plus went with me to confrontational meetings--there is help out there and there are resources-I bet you find others who have had this problem-if you are over 40, you are a protected category-the experienced nurse-if there is age discrimination your hospital could lose federal funding, if you can prove age discrimination. It sounds as though you do not work in a state that has a union or hospital that has a union-also are you in a right to work state? Take care and do not be afraid to stand up for what is right-I strongly suspect there are others that have similar stories-and you may unleash a torrent. Good luck.

Dear New Nurse, You are fine-I am an experienced oncology nurse-and well remember my first year-it really does take a year--first 3 months are actually the worst-it gets easier after that-one day you will look back on it as funny-I celebrated my 30th year this past june--first year of anything new is harder-my cousin just finished her first year teaching at a university as full time faculty-she learned a lot and is wiser-plan yourself a vacation for a year-maybe a min-vacation after 3 months to celebrate what you have accomplished and learned-you deserve it. One day you will hear the same thing from a younger nurse and you will look back on this time and tell them things that helped you. Oncology is tough, for a new grad-you need to be a good med-surg nurse-because oncology affects every system and you see so much-oncology has always interested me intellectually because of the action of tumors and leukemmias-and the great advances that have been made in symptom management-when I was a new grad. the only antiemetics we had were compazine and thorazine-which are weak, to say the least-so nurses learned and invented lots of techniques like distraction, guided imagery etc. to help combat nausea and vomiting. Have you joined oncology nursing society chapter? that will help a lot-also going to ons congress and or institutes of learning will help a lot-ons has a great website-ons.org. where you can find a local chapter-if you join there is a great magazine and newsletter that you get that will help a lot. Seminars in Oncology nursing is also excellent publication. I don't know where you live, but this is a start. If I can help you, let me know. I live in north carolina and am an oncology clinical nurse specialist and nurse practitioner. Good luck and take care of yourself.

Angie, I agree-happened to me-I am taking legal action-filed complaint with eeoc-age discrimination and wrongful termination-eeoc issued right to sue this past week-however this action did get me out of a bad situation that is getting worse at the hospital I worked at-I am going to work at a much nicer hospital close by that has good openings in my field. I am in n.c. and there is an article by dr. carol swink on the ncbon.com website in the n.c. nursing bulletin which talks some about this-nc bon had to come up with a program which I am enrolled in because no remediation was given to me, when it has been for younger ones-I am going in oct. to be re-instated, I never would have thought this could happen to me, but I have fought back and have physician supporters.