Management Dynamics

sideshowstarlet said:

I wasn't born like this. I used to be nice when I started nursing. I'm in a second career now that I like way better and a job I love, but my previous experiences have pretty much made me the Patron Saint of Getting In Trouble at Work.  There is literally no healthcare-related workplace dysfunction that I have not experienced.

Nowadays, ChatGPT can help craft passive-aggressive emails if you find the act of writing about this nonsense making you angry all over again. 

No job is worth your health, especially not a job that would hire this clown show to manage things. 

OMG, I'm The Patron Saint of Being Disliked by Bad Managers. I pretty much get along with everyone wherever I work, but I'm not capable of letting unethical or unfair treatment go... And it doesn't even have to be about me. Inept management really doesn't like employees who stand up to them, but I'm not changing.  It makes life harder a lot of times but at least I know I'm doing the right thing. Or at least trying to.

sideshowstarlet said:

I think a few days. Honestly, if you don't hear anything by Friday, maybe it's worth stopping by the HR office in person. It would at least give you some peace of mind going into the weekend. 

Geez. So the meeting is still happening.

I have a certain way of dealing with things, but this may not be feasible for everyone. I'll write what I'd do anyway, and maybe it will be somewhat helpful.

I'd be tempted to write an email to this manager, cc'ing the manager's boss and HR, noting the last-minute cancellation after scheduling a meeting for "clinical issues" without further explanation. Also make sure to work in that you were not notified of this cancellation and ended up waiting for twenty minutes logged onto Teams waiting for this meeting to start and were only told of the cancellation after you took the initiative to reach out. Be as petty and passive aggressive as your heart desires and frame this as ensuring that a similar miscommunication is avoided next week. For bonus points, you can add that you have continued to work and precept new nurses without anyone giving you any negative feedback on your clinical skills (if you have past positive performance reviews you can reference, so much the better). Try to sound concerned and mildly disappointed that the meeting was cancelled, as you would have welcomed the opportunity to learn about and correct any clinical issues, especially as you continue to work and precept new nurses. 

And I would also express in the email that you are concerned about attending a meeting run by two people who had to be reported for inappropriate behavior. State clearly that, unfortunately, given your experiences with this company, you are concerned about retaliation. It is important to cc the manager's higher-up (if there are any) and HR and that you specifically use the word retaliation. I don't see a point in tiptoeing around this issue. I mean, the manager already knows you were the one to make the previous complaints about him and the doctor to HR. 

Your manager, unfortunately, does not seem like the kind of person who cares about whether or not you got shingles. It is unclear what brought your manager into healthcare or into management and why he has remained in management, despite apparently needing HR to reprimand him for inappropriate behavior exhibited as a manager. Is your manager related to any higher-ups there? Or dating one? Or maybe related to the problematic doctor?  This may seem like fanfiction, but from what I see, any of these theories seem more likely than your manager actually  being good at their job. 

I have met my spirit animal in you???. This response made me laugh out loud and open my laptop to send an email at the same time. My manager is the director of our ED, although she has neither ED nor managerial experience. We're 0/2 and everyone's losing. Good question about her relationship with the doctor and higher-ups. I don't believe she's related in any way to any of them. But we don't think anyone else wanted the job so she's a warm body.  I suspect she makes less money because of her inexperience and ain't nobody love saving money more than a for-profit hospital. I don't think she's inherently a bad person, but her lies, boundary issues, and unprofessionalism are making my life unnecessarily stressful and I won't have it. As for the EM doc, involving himself in nursing related processes is an inappropriate overreach. Unfortunately, this facility is the equivalent of inmates running the asylum.

Summer1976 said:

I have met my spirit animal in you???. This response made me laugh out loud and open my laptop to send an email at the same time. My manager is the director of our ED, although she has neither ED nor managerial experience. We're 0/2 and everyone's losing. Good question about her relationship with the doctor and higher-ups. I don't believe she's related in any way to any of them. But we don't think anyone else wanted the job so she's a warm body.  I suspect she makes less money because of her inexperience and ain't nobody love saving money more than a for-profit hospital. I don't think she's inherently a bad person, but her lies, boundary issues, and unprofessionalism are making my life unnecessarily stressful and I won't have it. As for the EM doc, involving himself in nursing related processes is an inappropriate overreach. Unfortunately, this facility is the equivalent of inmates running the asylum.

I'm amazed that anyone without ED or managerial experience can be hired to manage an ED, even if literally everyone else was dead. 

Be sure to BCC your personal email address, or forward the email to your personal email address in order to cover yourself. 

I'm glad I made you laugh and could serve as a spirit animal!

Brewingbiker said:

@sideshowstarlet THIS!!

Honestly, I wish I'd known someone like you back when I worked under my last manager at my old facility. It may have cut out a number of years of bullying (and that really is what this is) from an upper manager. 

I did not realize how over-stressed I was due to that person until I (finally) left. The sad part is, prior to that individual, I loved working there, and enjoyed working with my co-workers. I had some great experiences and learned a lot. But like the frog that is happily sitting in the pot of water, I never realized the temp started rising slowly until it was starting to boil.

I hate to see this happening to others, and hope the OP manages to get this under control -the damage to your health due to unwarranted stress is, well, not worth it.

Much like you, in my earlier years, I tolerated management bullies because I was new and didn't understand that I could respectfully fight back. Also like you, I really like most of my coworkers. Most days, because there are always exceptions, I feel like I'm working with my friends and that's a good feeling. But you're right, it's sad when the bad outweighs the good, and although it's imperative to speak up, it's unlikely that I'm going to  change management or the system. That's when you leave because, as you said, the damage to our health is not worth it.

sideshowstarlet said:

I'm amazed that anyone without ED or managerial experience can be hired to manage an ED, even if literally everyone else was dead. 

Be sure to BCC your personal email address, or forward the email to your personal email address in order to cover yourself. 

I'm glad I made you laugh and could serve as a spirit animal!

Trust me, we are ALL amazed. There's arrogance there, for sure. Who would want to run a department in which they have zero experience? And yes, good advice about the  BCC! I had read that somewhere online and did it, but wouldn't have thought of it otherwise. 

Summer1976 said:

Trust me, we are ALL amazed. There's arrogance there, for sure. Who would want to run a department in which they have zero experience? And yes, good advice about the  BCC! I had read that somewhere online and did it, but wouldn't have thought of it otherwise. 

Oooh! What tone did you end up  going for in your email? 

sideshowstarlet said:

the Patron Saint of Getting In Trouble at Work.

I like that! I used to fit that description -then I just got old and tired (grin), now I just want my days on shift to go by, and spend time with my wife, dogs, and harley. The sad part is, I used to really enjoy being a nurse. I looked forward to going to work. Oh well.

Emergent said:

They stood you up? These people sound so inconsiderate and unprofessional!

Right?! I shouldn't have been surprised but I was! I sat on that call for 20 minutes waiting for them. But honestly, their poor behavior is to my benefit.

sideshowstarlet said:

Oooh! What tone did you end up  going for in your email? 

I opted for a combination of respectfully requesting guidance coupled with shades of this is *** up and I'm not playing along with it. 

Summer1976 said:

I opted for a combination of respectfully requesting guidance coupled with shades of this is *** up and I'm not playing along with it. 

LOL! So how did the rescheduled meeting go?