Hippa

[color=olive]twas the night before hipaa (in the e.r.)

[color=olive]

[color=olive]'twas the night before surgery, and all 'cross the floor

[color=olive]the patients were buzzing 'bout the guy in room four.

[color=olive]his chart was hung on his door with great care

[color=olive]to make sure his name was not shown anywhere.

[color=olive]

[color=olive]the patients were nestled all snug in their beds

[color=olive]while telemetry monitors beeped overhead.

[color=olive]and i in my gown, with its crack in the back,

[color=olive]had just settled down for my clear liquid snack.

[color=olive]

[color=olive]when down the hall there arose such a clatter,

[color=olive]i sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.

[color=olive]i pulled off my leads and flew out the door,

[color=olive]with my iv pole dragging behind on the floor.

[color=olive]

[color=olive]away to room four i hurriedly dashed

[color=olive]unaware of my gown and the nurses i flashed.

[color=olive]as i slid to a halt and leaned to peek in

[color=olive]i heard the nurse say, "sir, you mustn't go in!"

[color=olive]

[color=olive]and what did i see when i looked in bed a

[color=olive]but ole mr. claus; on his belly he lay.

[color=olive]covered in gauze and stuck high in the air,

[color=olive]oh, what a sight, 'twas st. nick's derriere!

[color=olive]

[color=olive]he was yelling at doris, the nurse at his side

[color=olive]to be tied to this bed, he just could not abide.

[color=olive]he moaned and he bellowed about his ill luck

\n>>>but there was just nothing for it; the old man was stuck.

\n>>>

\n>>>"what happened to santa?" to doris i said,

\n>>>"why is he on his belly in this hospital bed?"

\n>>>with a grin she whispered, "he did something stupid.

\n>>>he injured his butt when he backed into cupid."

\n>>>

\n>>>but the old man's ears were sharp as tack.

\n>>>he heard what she said there behind his back.

\n>>>"you had no right to speak, and that is a fact!

\n>>>don't you know about hipaa, the privacy act?"

\n>>>

\n>>>"you're out of compliance, doris, my dear.

\n>>>you had no right to tell him 'bout my injured rear!

\n>>>i'll sue you for breach, and this hospital, too!

\n>>>you won't have a job when i'm through with you!"

\n>>>

\n>>>"when i check my list and then check it twice,

\n>>>you'll be in the column labeled 'not nice.'

\n>>>the office for civil rights soon will drop by

\n>>>to find out why you, doris, did not comply!"

\n>>>

\n>>>"they'll want to know why you opened your yap,

\n>>>a big, hefty fine on your butt they will slap.

\n>>>and from me every christmas you will now see

\n>>>nothing but switches and coal 'neath your tree."

\n>>>

\n>>>so take heed of your privacy notice, and zip

\n>>>

\n>>>your lips, and your records, and files encrypt,

\n>>>

\n>>>and in privacy's silent night, you too may hear

\n>>>

\n>>>"merry christmas to all and a hipaa new year!"",1] ); //-->