Feedback on this cover letter Please????????

Published

Rip it to shreds if you must, I ain't scurred :clown:. I'll take the good, the bad and the ugly, I just need to know if i'm on the right track. What should I add or take away. I'm having an extremely difficult time selling my self to do something for which I have absolutely no experience.

Dear XXX:

My name is XXX and I am a motivated Registered Nurse who is extremely interested in the full time position with XXX Healthcare at your New Jersey center advertised on the XXX Healthcare career site. I ask that you please consider me for this remarkable position.

Through my nursing education and clinical rotations I have gained a well rounded set of nursing abilities which include strong physical assessment skills, prioritizing of patient care, therapeutic communication and safe medication administration just to list a few. The experience of providing care for patients and their families in all stages of life and various stages of illness afforded me the opportunity to strengthen many nursing skills and my passion for this profession. With my extensive background in Customer Service and Sales, I have gained excellent verbal and written communication skills, the ability to work with and relate to various personality types, critical thinking, and mastered the art of time management. These important skills translate well in to nursing. These attributes coupled with my eagerness for knowledge, patience and passion for helping others are what make me a great nurse and an excellent candidate for this position.

I am extremely interested in building my nursing expertise with a career at XXX Healthcare. My resume can only tell you so much about my motivation and qualifications as a Registered Nurse. I know that I am capable of exceeding your expectations as an active member of the XXX community. Please feel free to contact me any time at (908) 555-5555 or [email protected]. Thank You for your consideration in this exciting opportunity and I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Sincerely,

XXX

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Leadership, Psych, HomeCare, Amb. Care.

The cover letter is your advertisement. It should create an interest in meeting you, but it needs to be concise. Bullet points are great.

" My name is XXX and I am a Registered Nurse who is extremely interested in the full time position with XXX Healthcare at your New Jersey center advertised on the XXX Healthcare career site. I ask that you please consider me for this remarkable position." Too much hyperbole. Is the position truly remarkable?

I'd list your nursing and customer services skills as bullet points, and it is great to point out your transferable skills. Just don't claim expertise if it's not there. From your letter, you appear to be a new nurse. Don't claim to be a great nurse unless you can back it up. Don't oversell yourself.

Sorry, that's all I have time to write. Overall, a good start, but more concise, less wordy.

Good Luck.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
The cover letter is your advertisement. It should create an interest in meeting you, but it needs to be concise. Bullet points are great.

" My name is XXX and I am a Registered Nurse who is extremely interested in the full time position with XXX Healthcare at your New Jersey center advertised on the XXX Healthcare career site. I ask that you please consider me for this remarkable position." Too much hyperbole. Is the position truly remarkable?

I'd list your nursing and customer services skills as bullet points, and it is great to point out your transferable skills. Just don't claim expertise if it's not there. From your letter, you appear to be a new nurse. Don't claim to be a great nurse unless you can back it up. Don't oversell yourself.

Sorry, that's all I have time to write. Overall, a good start, but more concise, less wordy.

Good Luck.

You mean to tell me that simply passing the NCLEX does not make me a great nurse!!???? :lol2::lol2::lol2:,

Anyway, you are absolutely right about everything you said. I'm gonna tone it down some. Luckily I didn't send that one out yet :). Thanks for the advice

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in L&D,Mother/Baby, WHNP,Educator,NICU.

Hi,

Also I would recommend making it specific to whatever position you are applying for. You will need to tweak it for each position, but it is worth it. For example, if it is for a med/surg position, briefly mention what you did on the med/surg clinical rotation you had in school, like "managed chronic diabetic pts", etc.

Hope this helps and good luck!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion