cultural question

[kessadawn, BSN, RN]

Hello all! Wasn't really sure where to post this, thought someone in the hospice field may know the answer.

Last week I had an infant pt in the PICU that was a DNR. Parents were primarily spanish-speaking, and sometimes communication was difficult. To make a long story short, Mom had been holding him the last few hrs of life, but as soon as our MD pronounced him, Dad took the baby from her. Mom asked me if it was OK to hold the baby since she had a Csection with his birth (well, not in so many words, but in her very limited English). She seemed to want to hold the child in the worst way, but was very troubled, as was the father. Is there a belief in the hispanic community regarding a Csection and a dead child being held? Is it bad luck? After the interpretor arrived (this was the middle of the night) she did eventually hold the child briefly, but I was not able to talk to the interpretor before she left with the family. Any info would be greatly appreciated...we are all baffled here.

Thanks!

kessadawn:nurse:

[BeExcellent]

I am sorry you had such a sad situation. I don't know about the C-Section unless the mother was indicating that she was the birth mother. My experience with death and infants has been the mother has a real need to hold and often rock the baby until she is ready to let go after the death. It is as if they need to grieve and in their grief reach a point that they know the child's life is gone. This can take a while. This isn't specific to Hispanics.

[river1951]

Another thing that is good to do in this situation tho it sounds weird till you really think about it, is to dress the baby and take a picture. This helps the mother grieve. After all, there may not be anything else for her to have to remember the baby. We did this when we had late miscarriages as well-(this of course was long ago...)

[nambour51]

"she seemed to want to hold the child in the worst way" What do you mean?

[kessadawn, BSN, RN]

sorry, should have explained that better (and 3 months ago!:)). she wanted to hold the child after death, but the dad didn't want her too. his english is much more limited than hers, so i have no idea what his thinking was, and maybe he thought it would be easier for mom if she didn't, i don't know. what i understood from mom is that she was asking if it was okay to hold the baby, stating she'd had a c-section. it couldn't have been that she was concerned she would injure herself, he was 4-5 weeks old after all, and she'd been holding him for hours before his death. my clinical coordinator said she thought there was a superstition of some sorts in the hispanic community concerning holding a dead child, but i have searched the internet high and low and can't find the tiniest reference. we did encourage her to hold him finally, as we do all our parents in this situation, and she seemed better for it. i think i am just frustrated that i had such a lack of communication and wonder if i could've been more supportive if i was more familiar with the specifics of thier culture.

kessadawn:nurse:

[athena55, BSN, RN]

Dear Kessadawn:

Here is a great website that might help you in your quest to give culturally competent care to your diverse patient population:

http://culturedmed.sunyit.edu/bib/hispanic/index.html

This last web site is for the Transcultural Nursing Society

http://www.tcns.org/index.shtml

Good Luck.

Respectfully,

athena

[kessadawn, BSN, RN]

dear kessadawn:

here is a great website that might help you in your quest to give culturally competent care to your diverse patient population:

http://culturedmed.sunyit.edu/bib/hispanic/index.html

this last web site is for the transcultural nursing society

http://www.tcns.org/index.shtml

good luck.

respectfully,

athena

wow, thanks a ton athena! can't wait to hit the library for some of these books and articles!