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Discussion

At a crossroad

I'm not one to blab on forever so I'll just spit it out.

I was young moron that got 2 DUI's when I was 21 and then again at 25. I never had any responsibilities and was content being a young moron. Until...

I met my wife and we had beautiful children. I have always worked as a nursing assistant (since 19) and decided to get my RN. Worked FT nights through nursing school while my wife also did the same (FT days and nursing school as well) She graduated and unfortunately (as she was young) decided to move back to her hometown an hour away. I was devastated my kids had to go through this, and devastated for myself. Planning on moving there before the kids start school next year but that is a different story. Anyways the board allowed me to get my RN but warned me against future offenses.

I thought I had the alcohol thing behind me but I did not. Last February on a random night I met up with friends (kids were at their mothers obviously) at the bar, I had a blast and then slept in my car... with the engine on... in the parking lot... that's illegal. Yep. I got ANOTHER alcohol offense. I was charged and convicted of a Physical Control violation and have not had a drink since. I was court ordered to do AA and see a counselor. I have been seeing the counselor ever since.

I've learned my inability to control myself when I add alcohol and it always gets me into trouble. I am truly done drinking. But is it too late?

Does anyone know if the Ohio BON ever randomly does background checks? Do they check you at renewal? My crossroads is that I would love to put this all behind me and not have it hanging over my head, but at what cost? I have a family to provide for and I love my career and life. I'm not an out of control loser. My life is my kids, my fiance, and my career. I've just made a lot of immature and stupid decisions along the way. Not sure what to do. Any advice is appreciated! Thank you.

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    You must self-report any arrest, charge, or conviction to the Board of Nursing. Do it right away if you haven't already. They will likely place you in a monitoring program for nurses with substance-abuse issues/drug diversion/mental illness, and there may be restrictions on where you can practice and whether or not you can administer narcotics.

    Per the TOS of this site, we cannot offer you legal advice, but I do recommend getting an attorney to represent you before the BON. The Board is not your friend---they are there to protect the public, not us.

    And FWIW, I hope you are going to meetings and dealing with your alcohol issues. I'm a recovering alcoholic myself, and I get the sense that there may still be some denial working against you. The universe is trying to tell you something with these alcohol-related legal problems.....you may want to heed the warnings. Good luck.

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    A good program is an honest program, you know that though. I hear some fear in your post. If you wait for this to be discovered (and it will, because I know my BON does background checks) you will do nothing but worry about this, and then trouble it will cause you in the end will not be worth it. Face up to this, maybe attended some treatment while you still have insurance. Be proactive.

    Nursing aside, this is you life, and as addicts/alcoholics lies will kill us in the end. Your life is precious and now that you've had your first awakening about your problem you will be able to share your experiences with others. Keep us posted and welcome to the site!

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    • Author

    OK. I know what I need to do. Honestly I'm terrified. I don't know what I will do if I lose my license. I looked up the monitoring program and it looks like from what I read that you lose your license for 6 months. Is this always the case? Any one ever not lose it? I work home health and so I don't dispense narcotics nor have ever had a problem with them legally or otherwise. I have gotten away from meetings and I know I need to go back especially with all this going on. I think yes there is denial going on as well. I love the fact that I'm sober but I don't always want to admit that I can't control the problem on my own.

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    If you are referring to me, to answer your question my license isn't even suspended yet. We do not have an alternative to dicipline program in my state so everything goes to the BON and disciplines are permanently displayed.

    I got fired a year ago for diversion. I heard from the BON six months ago, and they meet this month to determine what to do in regards to a suspension (the rest of the contact is pretty typical- 6mo narc restriction, restriction on where I can work, aa meeting requirement, drug testing, all for 5 years). The suspension portion can be one of three things: a full year, a year with six months stayed, or a year with the entire thing stayed since I have kept myself out of nursing for a year.

    I could have worked this entire year (until they sanction your license you can work) but that would have been a huge mistake for me and I knew it. I have taken this last year of my life and worked hard to become stable, happy, and healthy. I can honestly say that even if I was suspended for a year I could not care less- it will be another year to find a job I had never thought of before. For instance- did you know some trees have two indicators that tell them when it is time to become dormant for winter? Or that lilac should be trimmed right after they bbloom to produce twice as many blooms the following year? I have learned more than just how to be happy this past year- it has been excellent!

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    • Author

    I want to thank you all for replying. I emailed an nursing board attorney and hope to hear back from her soon. I realize deep down that I still hear the drink talking to me and need to go back to the meetings. Going back again tomm night.

    Thanks for being honest and helping me to see I need to be honest if I really want to get through this and just not hide from it. I've been stressing about it since February now and I'm tired of it. It's exhausting. I'll get back to this thread with updates. Thank you all again!

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