Rantaboutit

Hi! By writing this i am hoping to achieve any bit of small advice or to see who might have been through anything like this. I am a new nurse in the state of South Carolina. Due to an unfortunate DUI incident in a different state I had to appear before the BON for SC before I could obtain my RN license. They suggested that I become a part of SCRPP in order to maintain my license. This requires me to completely abstain from alcohol for their suggested 1 year (a legal substance). I am 25 years old. I had no problems with these terms, especially as my career means more than anything. After a very short period of time, with no one getting to know me or my situation, it was suggested that I remain part of this program for 5 years. Along with this I am required to get tested, on average, 3 times a month. Every time i am tested it comes out of my own pocket. Also, they require me to go to at least 3 AA meetings a week (which can be difficult with working full time and NOT having a drivers license). In these meetings I am surrounded by people who are truly trying to overcome the struggle of a disease, and i am unfortunately there to just get a paper signed. I do not belong in these places and sometimes this just creates an unbearable amount of stress..to never know where someone is going to send me and what kind of money it will cost. I also go to an additional weekly educational and motivational meeting once a week. It takes an hour to get there and the cost for treatment, again, comes out of pocket. I admit that I made a painful mistake in my past but I do not have a substance use problem and I cannot wrap my head around any of this. I have no idea who I could possibly begin to speak with to gain some help in trying to relieve this awful burden that has been placed on my shoulders. Any advice would be great..thank you!