Thank you all for your condolences. He was my little sweetie, there are no words. Yes, I find it very difficult to even get out of bed and shower let alone try to be normal at work. I mean...I still feel like I do my job well and safely. It's just hard. So back to the drug test. Say I take it and they say it comes back positive. Which likely it will. Then what? To the poster that was concerned about my meds, I don't take them at work. I been on them periodically long before I lost my son.