haleybaleywaley

I was recommended by a nursing HR professional to wear a blue suit, white top, simple shoes, minimal make up, hair tied back, and a pearl necklace if possible. Not sure why she was so specific but I have always felt good and confident walking into interviews!

So two days ago I found out I failed the NCLEX after 265 questions and 4 painful hours. In reality I walked out of the test knowing I failed, my gut told me so and it was very right. Testing to the end is a tough scenario, you know you're fluctuating above and below the passing line the whole time and you know that last question is the only thing that matters. After so much time, your brain hurts, your heart hurts; I personally was giving the finger to the security camera above my head and chewed some skin off my thumb. But I'm not posting this to freak people out who haven't taken the exam yet or who are anxiously awaiting results after a long, long test. I'm writing it to let you know you'll be okay if you do fail in 265 questions. Now, I haven't retested yet, but I have confidence in myself, my brain, and my ability. I've known for a long time that I want to be a nurse and this hitch isn't going to deter me or lessen my passion in the slightest. It's going to make me stronger, more diligent, and it's going to remind me that not every day in this challenging career is perfect. One thing I need to stress is that this test DOES NOT determine what kind of nurse you're going to be. It doesn't test how passionate you are, it doesn't test how kind you are to your patients, it doesn't test how friendly you are as a coworker, and it doesn't test how well you stick an IV (because we all know patients judge you based on how many tries it takes you to get a line in). Your future employers will not know how many times you tested or how many questions it took you. Your future coworkers won't know that you cried the night you got home from the test (and later started and finished a bottle of wine). But YOU will remember the day you failed, not for how upset you may have been, but for how much harder it made you work. I hope those of you who read this, whether you pass (yay!) or fail, remember why you started the journey into nursing and remind yourselves that this exam does not define you. Though it may feel like you are nothing without those two letters after your name, it is you and the hundreds of thousands of nurses and future nurses out there who give those letters meaning.