I am finally an RN! I have struggled so much for those two letter to be in my name! Today I feel accomplished. I tested on Friday October 14th for the fourth time and passed after 5 hours and 265 questions. During the test I was so nervous because I kept seeing the same topics repeating over and over again, it made me panic. I had SO much pharmacology on my test and so that made me panic even more because pharmacology is not my forte!!! I'll give you a little background on my journey. I graduated from nursing school back in Dec 2013 from Puerto Rico. I didn't feel like the school prepared us for the NCLEX since they are not required to take it. After I graduated I came home and right away I began applying for the exam. I finally got my ATT letter and to my SURPRISE I only had a 1 month validation to test! I began to panic because I was not ready, I had not been studying since December. It was March. Well I took the exam In April of 2014 and I failed it after 75 questions. I was so embarrassed and ashamed. I fell into depression, so I stayed away from studying. I finally decided to sign up again in Oct 2014, but only because I felt pressured by my parents and friends, but I was in no way ready (emotionally, mentally, or physically) to take it again, again I got the 1 month ATT letter and this time around, I would lock myself in my room, cry a lot, pretend to study when parents came in the room to see how I was doing, but in reality I was sleeping away my depression. I went in to the test and Failed once again at 75 questions, but I knew I would. I had no faith in myself. After that failure, I decided nursing was not for me! That I didn't even want to be in this profession. So I put my books away, I put my notes away, I put my hope away. for 2 years I did not touch anything related to NCLEX. I wanted nothing to do with nursing. Then in 2015 I began working part time job and that helped me get out of the rut I was in. Come 2016 I decided maybe its time to try again. So this time around I purchased REMAR, PDA, Mark K and UWORLD. I began studying in May of 2016 and scheduled my exam for July 22. This time I prayed a lot more and I studied a lot harder. When the test came I just kept praying, saying please Lord let me go past 75 Q!!! I did! I actually did get past the 75 Q I was the happiest, I got to 111 and the computer shut off. I was relieved/worried all at the same time! I went home and then waited for my result. When I finally got them, there was a big FAIL! I was so devastated but, I had given myself the pep talk before I took the test! This time around I would try hard to pass, but if for some reason I didn't, I would not let that stop me from trying again. I went on Vacations to Mexico and when I returned I began studying for the NCLEX once again. This time I changed my way of thinking! I did not allow myself to say anything negative! Everything that was related to the NCLEX was positive! I will pass! I will do great! I can do this! I began praying a lot more, having devotionals in the morning, that were motivational. this time around I just concentrated on UWORLD alone. I decided to do 75-150 questions a day. I would break them up into blocks of 25 tutor mode, all topics. For every question I got wrong I would do a flashcard. I would make sure to read all the rationales, and all the options that were wrong, as well as the learning objective. If I got the question right but mostly by luck I would do a flashcard as well! I did this for a whole month and at the end I had over 1500 flashcards!!! I had decided to give myself 2 months to study. So I started in August and scheduled my exam for Oct 14th. During my studying I was working part time and studying anywhere from 3 hours-7 hours a day. I just made sure to at least get 75 questions/flashcards done for the day! I had a crazy schedule at work, but thankfully I was able to study at work a good 4 hours during my shift so that helped a lot!! A month after I began studying I because full time at work, and was no longer able to study at work. My hours were still pretty weird so now I was finding it even harder to study before work, during work, or after work. So for the last month before my test I somehow managed to do 550 questions out of the 700 that I had left. I was planning on using other study material such as PDA, ReMar, and Hurst but I just didn't have enough time. Work wouldn't allow it. I was panicking and began having negative thoughts again!! but I didn't let the devil get the best of me!!! Every time I had a negative thought I would right away correct myself and say a prayer, asking for guidance and reassurance that I would do great!! I concentrated on trying to finish UWORLD. When it was time for the test I had 150 questions left. I decided to look over my labs, precautions, the morning of my exam to refresh my memory. Come the test, I prayed in the car, the whole drive to the center, when I was waiting, as I was about to start, all through the exam, during my breaks. I felt like I was doing horrible but I prayed anyway! Finally I realized that I was going to go all the way to 265 Qs and just like that it ended. Deep down I was so unsure I failed, but I still tried staying positive!! I got home. Nobody even knew that I was taking the exam! I chose not to tell anyone in case I failed I wouldn't disappoint anyone, or get any pity from them. Yesterday I couldn't wait anymore, I paid the $7.99 for quick results, I prayed before getting them and when I looked I had a big PASS!!! I began crying of happiness!! I was so overwhelmed with Joy!!! God is so good!! It was my time to pass! I declared it and God gave me this victory!! Overall, I feel like UWORLD, and PDA, Hurst, and Mark K. Helped the most!!! Remember if you are a repeat taker don't give up if you failed the first time or any time after that!! Stay strong, positive, motivated and pray a lot!