Rhan24

I have been an R.N. on my city’s pediatric hospital’s Hem-Onc/BMT unit for a little over a year now and recently I’ve been having a difficult time coping with patient deaths. Not that I didn’t care/feel sad before, but the deaths recently have been patients dying from secondary cancers/complications (GVHD) from treatment from their initial diagnoses. I think maybe it’s because in my first year of nursing I was so focused on getting my skills down (this is my first “big girl” job!) and building confidence that I didn’t understand all the facets of my patients’ medical histories and what relapses truly entail. Has anyone else in this sub-specialty felt this way? I have cried out to my trusted loved ones, asking what’s the point in torturing these children and teens with horrible treatments if they’re “just going to die anyway” (absolutely horrible, I know, but it’s how I feel sometimes). This overarching sadness and despair makes the challenges of bedside nursing (short-staffing, for example) unbearable. I feel defeated and like I’m not making a meaningful difference and dread going to work. I try to focus on positives in my life (vacations, new house) but this is a big part of my life too and this sadness is overwhelming. Any words of encouragement or insight is appreciated. Thank you for reading this far.

Has anyone not gotten a letter yet? I go to school in Athens so I can't go pick it up from the Urban Life building, my only option is to wait for the mail...

Also, are we only receiving letters or will there be an email sent out too?

I called at the end of Aug. and someone told me we'd hear by the end of this month/first of October, but that might be different now, since the above posts say mid-late Oct. and those were later posts.