teethotamales

Hi Kaley, Thank you for such a kind, understanding, supportive and objective comment. I appreciate it. I have been hurt angry, very! Fed up and ticked. For skills I was tested only once separately for vitals and for assessing the abdomen. I definitely approached other students and something was happening, I have no idea what it was, it was like there were two separate people for each one I spoke with. I was left abandoned to the table myself. It seems there was an intended message to myself and pointed to the class 'I did not belong'. It all seems like it was some sort of game. An unimaginable cruel inhuman act repeated for entertainment. People who could not feel. A drug for power. It was a twilight zone. I had had such a positive educational experience earlier when the worst thing that ever happened was an English Phd who drew graffiti red ink all over every paper I submitted. I was disheartened by her cruelty, but wow! Nursing school has been the most inhumane monstrous experience ever. I can not endure such abusive inhumane behavior, its traumatizing. Education should be fun, challenging, encouraging and supportive. When education hurts and traumatizes a person, it is not education - its abuse. In plain text from nursing school - abuse is criminal. The abuse perpetrated upon me subversively or not was criminal. I can not play a game with that. They should be prosecuted and removed from educating and or medicine. Morality, integrity and honesty have a higher purpose and deserve respect, I honor that and I honor that in myself. Maybe this was the whole purpose of contacting this site and reading your post, what do I value? I value that I worked honestly for what I wanted. I value that I appreciate honesty and respectfulness and fairness. Nursing school had nothing to offer me of any value, but to show myself that I am capable of committing myself, sacrificing to achieve, and seeing what dishonesty is about - tearing people down, arrogance, non-feeling, no empathy, destroying another if necessary. It was tragic, traumatizing, a tremendous loss of something that was so meaningful to me. I had a passion to care for others and in strengthening my own humanity. I was so thrilled to do this and excited about the clinical, I wanted to be floated all over the hospital so I could learn all the different areas and experiences. It would have been wonderful in another world and time. I have had a passion for the hospital and really being a passionate person in my work. I don't think nursing is hard and a no thanks. I am sure it is one of the most grueling of them all, but also the most rewarding in the soul, to love the life, to give of ones inner most being for care and kindness and support of others in a dynamic setting such as a hospital. It certainly is a place where a nurse is living, moving, working, lifting, communicating, all the while the grinding stone is polishing that essence of humanity inside to shine to light of life of living being to loving care. It is gorgeous. I can only wonder. I will live to do the best I can and love to those nurses who live on in my memory who were such gracious beings, stalwarts of dedication and capable and caring. To those special few in moments who had tender hearts to hold this one that wept profusely - yours was the golden medicine that endures and lives in infinity and your name that blesses humanity is written in the book of truth and the angels will read from it and call your name glorious, and I shall testify with a tear the truth that is written, you did love. Bless be you dear god for these angels you did send to comfort me in my time of sorrow. Thank you I was not alone, forgotten or abandoned, thank you for loving me and sending these loved beings so that the light may shine in me the honesty of your love.

I know that being a human being is the hardest thing of all. I never could have imagined the inhuman inhumane treatment that occurred in nursing school. The dishonesty, contemptible, cruel, irresponsible and sadistic actions, words and behaviors has been an unreality I just could not have expected. In all I was just foolishly asking an honest question which is after all an oxymoron for nursing, or nursing education. I did meet at least one kindly person and hope for them to survive and come out the other end still a kind human being. I will hope for her humanity, humanity needs her full human being to continue.

Hi, I found your site by mistake. I was just trying to find out statistics on what percentage of the nursing profession in general or in the state of California were transgender. I also saw a comment by a Practical Nurse instructor about a student nurse who is transgender. I was thrown out of my second attempt as an enrolled student in nursing school. The first nursing program was the registered nurse. I had worked hard and under stressful conditions to fulfill the prerequisites. It was an amazingly difficult survival time. I sensed not long after entering the program, actually at the time of the interview with one of the instructors, that there were disrespectful comments made about me, and it only grew worse. I was stressed out with much work and little sleep, but I was completely devastated to sense that I was not to be tolerated. I passed all my medication exams and lecture exams, but I had no one to work with for skills. I mixed up a step in assessing the abdomen, switched the listening for the next step of tapping. In vital signs I had never practiced on anyone either and had a terrible time finding the brachial pulse on anyone but myself. The instructor walked out of testing with testy comments, actually very rude. As she came back into the room I put those few moments to work and just did my own blood pressure. She would not allow it and handed me my walking papers. I cried, I sensed the time was coming, still I was devastated. I was actually destroyed. I had worked so hard to meet the requirements and once there I could not survive because staff and I would say a majority of my classmates could not tolerate me. I pulled through a great loss for me and enrolled in another college in their certified nurse assistant program - starting at the very bottom. I got it right away - the professor was nasty to me and another student always had something to interject about me personality every day in lecture. I commuted a long distance, lost sleep most nights, worked very hard, and had to have almost photographic memory in order to pass my exams as my text arrived so late that I had a lot of catching up to do. I have passed all my exams to date, was caught up on all assignments, yet I just could not tolerate the invisibility, castigating, and avoidance. I sat at a table by myself. The past Friday everyone was matched up with a partner for vitals accept me. I tried to overcome the emotional pain of 'unworthiness, unacceptable, nonexistence, I did my own vital signs. I was in emotional pain and then some unkind remark, and I just left and cried profusely. My training as a nurse was ended because I was not able to handle what would be unethical and abusive treatment for any patient. It meant a lot to me to realize my dream of becoming a nurse. The reality of the abusiveness to me was completely ignored and I was given the responsibility of 'having a problem'. I just wondered is it possible for a transgendered individual to have any possibility of becoming a nurse. It seems that there is totally no possibility within the 50 states of the U.S. I simply wonder if there is some foreign student exchange program for nursing where I would have every chance of receiving the necessary training, but I realize I would still be unemployable in the U.S. as the discrimination is so severe it would be practically impossible but that I could look for work in another country. I don't know if anyone would know anything on the subject, but if they did I would love to hear from them so I could once again pick up from this devastation.