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I will definitely check out the video! I love TED talk videos! Thank you, Quirk, for your kind words, it means a lot!

Thank you for your comment. I can really relate to your words. I guess I do get a little too down when I am not accepted by a small group even when there is a room full of other students who I could talk. I will try to slowly talk to more people and maybe sit in random different areas in the class whenever I am late. You have really come so far, and it makes me happy to know that even though it was a struggle for you, you made it out and are so happy!! Thank you so much!! This gives me hope!

I will definitely check out the book! Thank you for the kind words! I will try to do my best to change how I view my depression and my personality. I am sending you an even bigger hug now!

I can't believe how kind everyone has been here. I've cried a few times reading over some of the comments (I am slightly crying now), you guys are really so kind! I am happy that I posted this comment since I was expecting a lot of people to tell me that maybe this wasn't the job for me...I was pretty shocked that so many people expressed such words full of kindness and support. I remember when I had to choose a college/uni program in senior year, I chose nursing and thought "I'm not that great with talking but I'll learn how to communicate better",but I guess I never thought about how difficult it would be for me until this year. It comes so naturally to some people and sometimes I feel like I would never be able to get to that level. As for the antidepressants, I think I will go back to the doctor, I just haven't decided when yet...I kinda just stopped answering their calls and showing up to appointments. I'm not sure how the doctor will feel about me randomly coming back because I'm kinda anxious about how the doctor will think of me (I get anxious of everything). However when I was with the doctor, they did offer me a spot to get into free counselling rather then just taking the medication alone but during this time I did feel a little pathetic, embarrassed and thought that I would never change as a person even if I got all the help I needed, hence why I stopped going. I am considering going back and getting help again As for school...I still get very nervous and sad easily. However I have started asking some questions and talking more to one of my profs (just a few general questions during lab here and there) because she just comes off as such a nice and non-judgemental nurse, something that I want to emulate and come across as. All in all I feel the most comfortable in that class but I keep to myself most of the time in the other classes and don't really talk unless I'm talked too... I also start my placement really soon! Maybe then I will start to talk and interact a little more with some of my classmates. I know I'm not the best with people but when I had to choose a program all I thought about was having a very meaningful job and nursing is definitely meaningful You guys are really supportive, and I thank you for your kind words.

This is my first year in nursing school and I already feel like I've made a fool of myself. The first few months of school were completely terrible (September 2013 - December 2013). It was so bad that I was thinking about dropping out. I was breaking down everyday at home and crying after classes in the washroom stall at school and it got so bad that I had to see a doctor who then prescribed me some antidepressants. I mean they helped for a bit but I just stopped taking them and seeing the doctor cause I just didn't want to think of myself as being depressed...I just really wanted to make friends but I guess I don't know how and seeing everyone already arrange themselves into groups of friends really got me scared and sad. I'm really introverted but I hate that I'm introverted. I started to sit in the front of the class in the first row alone with no one beside me and every time there was a group activity I would die a little in inside. I do understand that I really have horrible coping mechanisms though because I found everything so overwhelming the first 3 months of school and the worst part is everyone in all my classes have surely noticed as well...I mean I am a very shy and quiet person all the time and I think people have heard and seen me crying before which makes it worse. I tend to make very bad small talk (so I avoid small talk now) and I hide during breaks in random empty rooms and sit by myself (I know, weird right?). This one girl did approach me in september and started talking to me but then she made friends with another girl who didn't really click with me (the girl avoided talking with me but talks with practically everyone in my class), and now I've heard them talking poorly of me a few times about how weird and awkward I am. Now we don't really talk and theres always this weird tension between us cause I guess I got kind of unkind (unkind as in stopped talking to her, ignoring her) when she stopped sitting with me and when I overheard her and her friend talking about me...which makes me realize that I am really acting like an immature highschool student but idk it kinda stung when I heard her saying things about me. After this experience I don't know how to approach anyone in my class, I just feel intimidated by everyone in my class and they just seem like they aren't interested in talking to me at all because I've already made a fool of myself. These things have happened to me all throughout elementary, middle school and highschool and I feel like its all repeating again. I've tried to talk to people a few times but it always ends in an awkward short convo. Even though its February right now I feel like everyone in my class still thinks I'm weird. Some girl in my class had to sit beside me and the prof told us to work in pairs, and I heard her mumbling "oh my god not her" and then calling to her other friends to work with her . When we have to get into groups in class, people give me weird looks when I try to sit with them. Now everyone in my classes are practically friends with each other and those two girls are friends with a lot of other people in my classes as well and I've heard them talking about me to other people as well. For example on the bus to school, some of the girls in my class sit at the back and I've heard them saying things like " (my name) is weird" or "shes awkward" and "she doesn't talk." I just feel like I've really isolated myself from everyone and I don't know how to really connect with anyone in my class when everyone already has a bad first impression of me. I care because these are my colleagues and this is a profession where teamwork is everything. I am really bad with small talk and I get defensive easily and I guess I just have a bad overall self concept. I dont want my shyness to interfere with my ability to do the job. I want to try and build my self concept more because I realize that I should change the way I see myself in order to approach people differently to hopefully change their opinion about me. I just don't want to feel like reverting back to the the awkward, quiet, shy loner I was in highschool. I really want to change myself. I just don't know how to approach the girls in my class...I feel like I've come across as the cold hearted, shy, quiet loner. I am sorry if I rambled a lot in this post, I feel so lost Any advice would be greatly appreciated! If your advice is going to be harsh, can you try to make it constructive as well? Thank you!