Adrian32

I haven't logged on in a while and only just now did I see the backlash my question raised. I want to extend my most sincere, heartfelt apologies to everyone for its insensitive tone. I guess I just wasn't thinking when I posted it. I thought it was an innocent question but I realize now how so wrong I was. I am so very very sorry. My question did not come from a place of prejudice or anything negative except maybe just outright ignorance. Yes, I am a new grad, and I also happen to be gay, and a minority. I was raised in California, which is also a large cultural melting pot, and I am not racist or consciously prejudiced in any way. But I am truly sorry for my insensitivity. The reason I asked in the first place was just because I may be relocating to NY, and I have had issues with social anxiety that I'm still actively working on. It's not that I would not care any more or any less for any particular kind of patient; I would try to treat them all as best I could. I know some patients will be more irritable or combative than others, and these are the people for whom I would have to develop a thicker skin. It's something I am working on. I guess I just wanted to stimulate discussion but I should have been more mindful about how. This has been a mistake on my part and again I am sorry. I hope you can forgive me.

Hi. I'd like to apply to CA BRN so I'm wondering what exactly their maternal and med surg requirements are? Thank you.

I very much be open to that. Wherever I settle professionally, I'm pretty resolved to start anew and come out, or at least not keep myself in a tight closet at least. My paranoia is around family and if I'm far away it would probably be easier to just let loose. The only gay community I'm familiar with is West LA. Where else might be good? :)

Thank you for the encouragement, dishes :)

What's the typical job of a graduate nurse as opposed to a RN? CNA-type stuff?

Indonesia. How about yourself? :)

What does it mean to "challenge the exam?" And yes, I do intend to pursue graduate nursing someday. But I better get some work experience, first.

You're right, lorirn2b. I plan to come out, just not now. I guess I'm not ready yet. But I completely agree it's hard to be genuinely free and happy if I feel like I always have to hide something.

That would sound really promising in terms of landing my first job but then again the fact that it's not health-related may make it harder for me to get into healthcare as a nurse in the long-run? If it were long term then I'd probably forget my nursing knowledge and skills. At the same time though, the truth is that sort of job really would appeal to me. I loved my nursing research classes and research in general. Is that researcher still looking to hire new staff? Haha. Sigh, I don't know the first thing about looking for clinical researchers like that. And I presume the same factors that would make it hard for me to get a nursing job (i.e. my lack of employment history, and my shyness) would also make it hard for me to get a research job, which I would also assume would prefer additional research training? Still though, I'm definitely open to the idea. Thank you, dishes.

Yes it's really held me back a number of times. In high school when it was really bad I remember winning a scholarship but was too shy to go get it from some hospital that was awarding it to me because it meant I had to have lunch with some administrators. I'm terrible ashamed of it. Since then I have really educated myself about it. Read a number of self-help books. Went through some hypotherapy audio programs. Even got one-on-one therapy for a little while. I'd get too shy to continue that, too. I also tried to participate in an experimental study to try out a new drug for social anxiety but the fact that I was exercising too much at the time excluded me. The social anxiety is not as bad anymore ever since the significant weight loss but the anxieties resulting from the obesity are now slowly being replaced by those stemming from my being unemployed at my age even with supposedly decent academic credentials.

I was thinking of doing that. I received CNA certification in California 6 years ago but never used it. I'm wondering if the process of getting myself recertified would require my taking CNA classes again? Or would the fact that I have a BSN degree help me work as a CNA right away? My guess is it depends on the state and/or individual healthcare institution?

I'm a new foreign graduate (with US citizenship) and am thinking about settling in NY to look for work. Presuming I actually overcome the hurdles foreign grads face in landing US nursing jobs, I'm just wondering what the typical patients are like in NY? I used to reside in California and I hear that New Yorkers tend to be more up front and abrasive, and that you need a thicker skin?

Does every state have its own NCLEX exam? If so, I guess I'd have to pick where to try to settle first. Thank you, swansonplace.

Wow for some reason I was under the impression that NY didn't require CGFNS. But I'll look into it. Thank you juan de la cruz. :)

In terms of concepts behind practice I think the parallel is there. The only thing I know I would have to catch up on is the equipment/technology. But yeah it seems like a uphill battle, sigh. I'm sorry, but what does "OP" mean? Thanks again for the input dirtyhippiegirl.

I hope not to have to deviate too far away from nursing for my first job. Do you think it would be too difficult for me to land maybe a CNA job at an urban setting without work experience?

I would love to do that except would i also be a research subject? I'm not sure what you mean. I think a lot of my social anxiety is mostly specific now to my life circumstance at being rather psychosocially delayed, if that's even the correct term. I feel insecure about being my age and supposedly successful at school but not really having anything to show for it, professionally. It's just embarrassing and makes me on edge when meeting new people.

No, I have no work experience. Just got my BSN there. I got training and certification as a CNA in California but only as a requirement to get into a program and I was never actually employed as a CNA.

Thank you dirtyhippiegirl! After posting this I felt kind of queasy because yes, it all was embarrassingly TMI, and blatantly so. As much as I'd like to get into some anamnesis, or my own psychoanalysis of my situation (i.e. the social anxiety and gay part), I guess you're right about leaving this out of an interview. What was I thinking? I really like the reasons you cite up there for my lack of employment history. I mean they are my reasons and of course I've always known them but I was never too sure what to emphasize because everything feels so boggled with all the other TMI, which are at the heart of the matter and which have probably been more significant in getting me to where I am now. It probably sounds a bit silly to attribute it to shyness or sexual orientation, and these are but mere aspects of my life that have taken on gargantuan proportions but I need not to let the interviewer know that. About the lack of extracurriculars...do employers look much into this? Would it suffice to say that I wanted to really focus on my studies, and have my good academic record support me on this? And the lack of internships and summer jobs before I graduated, when I was supposedly not so busy...I cringe at the thought of saying that I was studying in advance for the next upcoming semester. Sigh. Thank you dirtyhippiegirl you've been such a great help already.

Hi all. Maybe this thread would best fit under some life-coaching or psychotherapy category, or something of that nature, but I could really use some advice and I'm not sure where else to go. I was raised in California and earned my first BS degree there, but went to my fatherland in Indonesia to take up nursing. After 4 years, I'd graduate from a BSN program, take the local boards, and obtain an Indonesian license. I do not intend to use this license locally, and the only reason I took the board exam was because I heard many states in the US are requiring this in order for me to sit in for the NCLEX. I'm at a point where I need to decide which state to pursue practice. I'd prefer to return to CA, but I hear the BON there is quite strict with foreign graduates and that maybe I'd have a better chance in NY. I am a US citizen and so getting myself in the US is no problem. So this is one big question about which I need discerning. Any thoughts or advice? I am not tied down to CA, as I do not have a home there anymore, so any state is possible, though it'd be nice if I knew someone there to begin with. That aside, perhaps my most pressing dilemma is this: I'm 32 years old, and have zero work experience. The thought of having to explain this to my prospective employers is absolutely daunting. My family wonders. My friends wonder. Those recruiters and interviewers would definitely wonder why, too. Because the fact is that I graduated at the top of my high school, at the top of my graduating class of the UC program of my first bachelors degree, as well as at the top of my nursing program in the Indonesia. But the truth is that my being "book-smart" has been somewhat of a compensation for my general lack of confidence, ever since childhood. I remember growing up to be a painfully shy child. I was also morbidly obese. And I was (and still am) a closeted gay person. My shyness was pretty bad all throughout my grammar school years. I had my small group of closer friends, but I'd always shy away from gatherings or parties where I might have to meet strangers. The thought of trying a summer job or any extracurriculars was terrifying, so I never did. Around my high school years I'd diagnose myself with social anxiety disorder. I'd get this confirmed by a psychiatrist who'd prescribe me celexa, which I took for only about a month before I stopped seeing her all together. I'd do my own self-medicating with self-help books and herbal remedies after that, but I guess nothing ever really worked. I'd just force myself to endure new situations and meeting new people as best I could. Sometimes it went well, other times it didn't. But the shyness has always prevented me from going up to the really "important" people, like potential interviewers, or to chat with authority figures just to schmooze and network. I suppose my shyness was also due in part to the fact that I was morbidly obese and gay. Being a "sissy" big guy was always something I felt insecure about. In any case, after earning my first degree, I'd fix the "obese" part over 2 years with diet and exercise. Having shed nearly 130lb, I'm at my ideal body weight now and have kept that off for nearly 7 years. I am a physically fit person and this is one of the few accomplishments I am genuinely proud of. Now about the closeted gay part. Somehow this has always inhibited the full expression of my personality, which contributes to my scarcity of close friends. It's not that I'd be "flamboyant" or obviously gay otherwise (or that I see anything wrong with this), but I feel that being closeted prevents me from really being myself around acquaintances to allow for a possible close friendship. It makes me feel insecure to have to hide this. But I am a part of a closeted gay relationship with my first and only boyfriend, now of nearly 4 years, and this is something I am also very proud of, but someday we'd both like to just be free to express our affection publicly. It's very hard to do that right now for a myriad of reasons, and if it were easier for us to come out of the closet, we definitely would. Well...back to HS and college. I did well cus I did nothing but study. My social life sucked and I was too afraid to try internships or summer jobs. 4 years would elapse between graduation from UC and entry into my BSN program in the Indonesia. In that time I'd focus on weight loss, take up nursing prerequisite classes part time in various community colleges, and help my mother take care of my physically ill father, who had cancer. I would accompany him on doctor's appointments, drive him to and from a dialysis center, and prepare his meals. He eventually passed away which is why I traveled back to Indonesia, to bury him. For what it's worth, I had also earned CNA certification in those 4 years as a prerequisite for an entry level masters in nursing program in CA. But I was denied admission. So I took up nursing in Indonesia. I managed to do well considering the slight language barrier, as I never really learned my native tongue too well since I moved to the US at an early age. On a positive note though, I think I do well with patients for the most part. It's the initial greetings and getting-to-know-you bit, especially with their families and friends, that I tend to struggle with. But somehow, the fact that I have some defined therapeutic relationship with them takes a little bit of the edge off from the "performance" aspect I most fear in nonprofessional, social relationships. In fact, I've surprised myself that I can establish really good rapport with patients sometimes, and part of the reason I've done so well in nursing school is because I can think outside of the box and be quite creative in my approach to establish that rapport. I've composed a list of the out-of-the ordinary measures in case I can cite them for prospective employers. In spite of my shyness, I know in my heart of hearts that I am a compassionate guy and can become a really effective nurse someday. I just need to get my foot in the door, tough out the initial jitters, and continue to learn to hone my cognitive and motor skills. I know my heart and attitude are in the right place. In any case, the only reason I mention any of that is because I wonder if it any of it will matter in terms of explaining my lack of an employment history considering my age, or whether I should even broach them to my prospective employer in the first place. What do you guys think? I'd really appreciate any feedback. This has gotten to be a really lengthy post and there's so much more to say but I better end it here. Thanks so much for reading and for your support. :)