RoxieRN0511

Thank you soooo much for reassuring me!!! I was feeling so inadequate but I was just trying to be safe. The DON said it takes her 4 hours to do that morning med pass... Yet somehow after 4 shifts on that hall and less than 2 months of nursing I'm supposed to be faster?! Ugh. I got to work this morning and figured out that I was moved to the other hall because they had scheduled someone to orient on that hall. Sigh! I'm clearly not ready to TRAIN anyone! So that's a relief that it's not just because they hate me or anything. I'm on the acute side by myself and I think it should go well barring any major complications

So I just got my license in January (graduated in December). The facility I'm working at has a long term care hall and a shorter term/more acute hall. I oriented on the long term hall for 3 shifts.. With a nurse who then got fired. I had never worked as a nurse at all except in clinicals, had never had more than 4 patients (at the hospital) and had never done paper charting before (the hospital I did my preceptorship in is totally electronic). So I get thrown out into the hall with 35 patients and a MAR when I had never seen one in my life! It was awful. Then I oriented on the more acute side and got a pretty good orientation there, did shift there on my own for about three weeks with no issues. I felt pretty competent and even had an emergency where we had to send a pt back to ER and the doctor told me I had done a great job. Suddenly I'm told by management a full time position has come available.. And it's on the other hall. I was scheduled to reorient to that hall.. And the day before someone didn't come in and they called me into that hall. It was insane. So based on THAT (coming in when meds were already late, not being familiar with the way they chart over there because my first orientation all the nurse did was have me pass meds and "chart" all day) they decided I needed MORE orientation (which I was happy about!) I went and did the orientation and it helped. The day I thought I was totally going to rock it, the night shift had missed a trough for an IV antibiotic so I didn't have it. I had to call pharmacy, assemble it from the emergency kit, etc. took about an hour out of my med pass. The rest of the day went smoothly in my opinion. I specifically asked the person who was training me what management's concerns were and he said just speed and organization. On a LTC hall where the patients are roaming about and not in their rooms a, both of those just take time IMO. I'm careful about the meds I pass. I make sure I have blood pressures before I give bp meds. The CNAs do vitals, but it's totally impossible for them to get to it before I need to pass my morning meds. I'd rather know i'm not going to bottom out anyone's BP than get my med pass done in 2 hours and hope for the best. I asked the DON if there were any concerns and she just said it wasn't me, it was because I am a new grad and they knew I had poor training. And then she talked about making sure not to make med errors but also meds are "late" if they're not an hour before or an hour after. So be accurate but super fast. I feel like I can't do that as a new nurse! The nurse who was training me had worked this hall for a year and popped all the pills by memory and then just glanced at the MAR to sign them off. I know I'm not going to be to that point anytime soon!!! I have a general idea as to what everyone takes but... I just got my license, would like to keep it and don't want to kill anyone. I left last night feeling pretty good. I'm still a little slow compared to those who have been there for longer but I'm feeling more confident. Then this morning I'm told that Saturday, which was supposed to be my first solo shift, I'm going to be working the acute side again. ?!?!?! I'm fine with that - I liked it better over there - but my gut feeling is that they don't think I can hack it. I'm so worried that I'm a terrible nurse or something. The ONLY thing my trainer has suggested that I haven't done is to come in at 540 in the morning for my 6 am shift. A) they told us in orientation not to clock in until 5 minutes before our scheduled shift time and working off the clock can cause immediate termination and b) seriously being there at 6 is a miracle for me in the first place. I am a single mom and have to take my kid to daycare in the morning so it's not as if I just get up and go. If he sleeps over at the babysitter's I can, but then there's A. Anyway, any words of advice? Is it me? I haven't made any errors or had any incidents that were caused by my actions, but I just don't know. I feel incompetent and like they think I am incompetent but just won't tell me to my face. Ugh! I like the job. I hate the patient ratios. I like the people I work with and I love the patients already. But I don't know what to do differently. I just need more time and practice on that hall to get faster. I know they have a state survey coming up, so maybe that's why they're so concerned? No idea. Help!

I totally agree. The aides are priceless and super important and I do everything I can to help them. I just can't believe the way the NURSES are "orienting" me. I'm going back tonight and I am not going to take that crap. There's a person who has already been oriented and is scheduled for that shift - their job is to show me what goes on during that shift! Not sit behind the nurses station doing who knows what while I do all their med passes and running around. I know how to pass meds. I can read. I need to know about the assessments and what I'm expected to do on that shift! BESIDES meds! Lol

I graduated, passed NCLEX, and landed a job in a LTC/SNF. I was so excited - and even though the first day was ROUGH... 30:1 patient ratio with 3 aides who were MIA most of the time... I was feeling okay. I had the same preceptor on that hall for 3 days and that was great. However, now I'm orienting on a different hall and my "preceptor" sat on her butt at the nurses' station and let me pass her meds. She didn't orient me to the hall, didn't tell me that I needed to be doing focused assessments on the patients (I was just told to do meds! I obviously did assessments that went along with the meds - like vitals with meds that needed them and evaluating sedation and so forth) and then when I asked for help getting all the meds out because the end of my scheduled shift was coming, I was told to never expect to get out on time and it's "just a nursing thing." I told her that I was NOT informed of this - the shift was supposed to be a med assist shift, only 6 hours - and I'm a single mom with a 3 year old in daycare until 10:30 at night and I really can't stay any longer. Is this normal? How do people do this? Especially single parents?! My family has all said they are only willing to be used as backup childcare and I just feel soooo guilty working 14 hour days (this is from last week when I was working "12s") and having my baby at daycare all that time. And being told that never getting out on time is just a nurse thing?! So I'm doomed to working 13 14 15 hour days?! I'm so discouraged. I'm going to bring the issue directly to management. I don't feel safe when I don't know the procedures of the area I'm working in. I worked too hard for my license to lose it. Sorry, I'm mainly just venting. But any words of encouragement or advice?