ChristinaV

Since my original post,the ball has started rolling here with a few disturbing twists. Our social worker was informed of "complaints by several workers", no ones name mentioned. The woman who went to her on our behalf reported back to me that they ARE aware of his behavior and he has in fact done this to our ADON! The DON's choice of handling this matter is to hold an inservice on sexual harrassment! However, and I hope you are all sitting down for this one........for valentines day our DON wants us to make out little cards to our coworkers and tell them why we like working with them. Yesterday when inquiring about how many cards we have all made out, she said......"and for Gods sake dont forget about ******.Yes, the pervert. THIS is why no one has persued the matter seriously. Luckily, I hope for us, they started a new administrator this week. She will be getting a letter about this and also a copy of the law and our rights so she'll know that we KNOW this is NOT sexual harrassment but assault! In the meantime, for me personally, if he touches me again I will call the police. Period.

Thanks to all for such an overwhelming response!!!! You know, I also wondered how this situation has been going on for so long. What I witness is a group of predominantly single, financially strapped women in fear of losing their jobs or having thier paychecks tampered with. This man is also responsible for our shift scheduling. He has the power to make life very difficult here. I know.....I know. However in this area, jobs are not plentiful as they may be elsewhere. I also note that in this area of the country, women are still reluctant to have a voice. Not all, but some. And its the "some" that these predators zone in on. I am the new employee, here from a different part of the country which is a bit more progressive in terms of defending ones rights. But you know.......I have also done no more than slap him away and try to "reason" with him. I have been here before, stood up for a cause, been the voice of many, and with dire results to myself. In a perfect world, yes there are laws and rights and just simple morality. Life is different in a small midwestern town. At times I feel Ive ended up in the twilight zone. I agree with the majority here that we should go to our DON as a group. Even if she and the freak are friends, she cant fire all of us. He cant tamper with ALL of our paychecks, cant cut ALL of our hours or schedule us for days that conflict with our availability. I know you are thinking, but if you go to the DON, he wont be here anymore"! Maybe, maybe not. Others in this facility have been kept on just because of who they know. Others have been let go for their lack of popularity. I am one who doesnt get involved in the he said she said nonsense of everyday life. I dont hang out at the nurses station amidst the chaos. If I have down time (ha,ha) I hang with my residents and get to know them, listen to the stories of their lives and just try to keep busy. I am also a new nurse. An "older" new nurse. I worked so hard to get here and was comitted to stay at my first job for the first year as was suggested to us in school. This facility is not your traditional nursing home. We are also have a ventilator unit. I stay for the experience some nurses may never gain in their careers. Anyway......this situation cant be allowed to continue. I have an aide who becomes physically ill having to report to duty. I have a 60 some odd year old housekeeper who tells me she hadnt been touched "there" in 30 years. Someone else here made the point, what about the vulnerable population living here? What about children in this perverts family? This is what we decided to do initially.......I went to a woman who has worked here for years and asked her advice. She did NOT seem surprised by what I told her, however swallowed real hard as if to say "oh God we ARE going to have to deal with this finally". She felt that anonymity might get more results as the situation is being brought out into the open. She is going to the staff social worker to report that the employees have a problem. She will ask her to speak to the DON and suggest that the employees be brought in to tell what has happened to them. This way, no one can be labeled the whistle blower. Everyone involved said that if questioned, they would tell the truth. This should have happened yesterday. I dont go back in until tomorrow. I hope I can come back on here and report that hes gone. But something in my gut tells me it wont be that simple. If he stays, the owners will have to be notified and then if nothing is done, then the authorities will become involved. In the meantime we are on gaurd and no one is laughing at him. He has been slapped and punched. He likes it but it helps these women to feel a little less a victim.

Who would you go to????? We work at a small close knit facility. Our payroll clerk has been employed here for years and has been groping female employees for YEARS. Most of the women push him away and tend to laugh it off in front of him, Im sure out of embarrasment and fear that he will manipulate the paychecks in some way. Some employees have been more vocal towards him and he leaves them alone for a time but usually resorts back to his old behavior. Lately his behavior has become more disgusting as he now reaches between the legs from behind and gropes private parts then laughs about it. He does this to the aides, nurses and housekeepers. Young and old!!! Problem is he is personal friends with our DON so no one has gone to her. Our new ADON is a very timid woman and the owners are absent. This behavior must stop. It isnt funny! I am a new employee who has been "chosen" to bring this problem to someone who will put an end to it. I have no idea who to go to. One of the employees wants to go to the local police but Im not sure if its a police problem. We cant afford to lose our jobs due to the friendship between our DON and this pervert. Any advice??? I have even spoken to this man about the possiblity of losing his job and possibly his home. I asked if it was worth it. He responded by poking at my breast and walking away. Nothing seems to deter his behavior. What would YOU do??????? Thanks.

Thanks to everyone for the links and information! After researching at the library and looking through nursing journals I was afraid I wouldnt be able to gather enough information to write an informative report. Now Im looking forward to this weekend when I can put everything Ive learned together, and present an accurate picture of this culture. I have always been drawn to the spirituality of the Native Americans and I knew that they were honorable and respectful people. I realize that probably most of the NAI's I may encounter will be very americanized and utilize modern medicine. However I hope I will also see, as I do in my own family (Sicilian), some of their heritage and "old ways" still intact. I love sitting and talking with the elderly about the past and getting their views on the changes in the world. Our nursing homes are chock full of people who seem to be "thrown away"........so sad! So many of them have lived in a world that we'll never again see, worked hard, loved and lost so much. My Great Grandfather died at 103 yrs old. He was a 14 year old Sicillian boy who landed on Ellis Island alone and with nothing. We honored him and kept him at home until the day he passed away. I never tired of listening to his stories about the "old country". My main goal when posting for information was simply to learn about any cultural barriers that I might inadvertently cross when caring for a Native American. Being a Sicilian originally from NY and living now in the midwest, I DO everyday, notice cultural differences between myself and my class mates and coworkers. People here are more judgemental and indirect than we are back home. I have not felt "accepted" or respected alot of the time here and I dont want to ever make a patient of mine feel this way. Doing my clinicals at a state run nursing facility I see the elderly being so disrespected, not properly covered, being spoken"about" as if they arent there....... Well, Im off to study for parenteral feeding. Thanks again!!!!!

Would appreciate any input. Seeking info for cultural differences that may arise when caring for a Native American. Would love any first hand experience with such patients in the field! Thanks!

Hello!!!! I have acquired a computer virus that I cant get rid of (backdoorcfb?) sometimes I can sign on and sometimes I cant, but here I am. Anyway......med term has been extremely interesting to say the least. I have learned that in this particular class I had to find my own way and am doing well. Test scores have been 88,98,100 and last night a 95. I do use flash cards, make myself tests and during muskuloskeletal, even drew myself little pictures of the internal structure of bones so I could "see" what it was I needed to remember :chuckle . Alot of folks in my class arent doing real well so I am grateful that I found a way around our flighty instructor. He goes off on tangents about something for half an hour and then tells us not to worry about the information because its not relevant to med term. This, after I took pages of notes! So I go through my text, take notes on anything highlighed or term related, make my index cards with additional info on the back just to know, and make myself a final exam as I go along. Soontobe RN, you are so right about looking for clues in a word I think I dont know. Last night our test was on cardiovascular and I studied my butt off. However it was a large chapter that we went over in class on MOnday, then were tested on Tuesday night. Not much study time! So the teacher told us what was important and what not to worry about for the test, such as medical procedures and tests. I self tested and felt confident, knew all the medical terminology, pathology, disease conditions. When we got our test and opened the first page we all kind of not so silently gasped! Yup, test procedures, surgical procedures........things we didnt study. Some of it was luck but some of it I was able to figure out by the root words and suffixes. I got a 95. I will never however trust that teacher again, and will study evrything! The text we use is called The Language Of Medicine by Davi-Ellen Chabner. Good luck to you too Soontobe and thanks to everyone for the help and support. The funny part in all this is that I think my partner knows almost as much as I do now! We make up quirky little ways to remember terms and have fun with it! The first week we were grocery shopping and all these words kept jumping out at me screaming to be disected and Ive been picking apart words ever since. Hope this condition goes away :rotfl: If I can help anyone else please feel free to contact me. Hopefully I can get rid of this virus or my computer will have to go in the shop. Have a great day!!!! Christina~

Thank you all for the support, advice and vote of confidence. The flash cards have helped greatly. Last night I self tested on 80 root words, prefixes and suffixes and only got 2 wrong!!! I have accepted that I need to show up for class and learn to filter through the crap I dont need, like my teachers views on childrearing......and do my studying and real learning at home. We have a three chapter test tomorrow and you wouldnt believe the people who havent even cracked the book! So I guess Im doing alright :) I think I panicked when I saw all of the biology, body planes and cavities, cell formation etc. I thought it was just "terminology". As someone said, each chapter has many terms that I learned previously and although we HAVE NO homework, I am doing all of the excersises in the text book. The repetition helps alot. Anyone else who is going through this course......"Lets just do it!!!!!" We can, if we want it bad enough. Oh....my teacher also told me I was "over studying" saying the text has alot of useless info, but he couldnt narrow it down for me. Im sticking to med terms and anything highlighted. We'll see how I do tomorrow! Thanks again!!!!!

Ok this is a joke right???? Granted this is only my second class. We are on chapter 3 and already we have hundreds of root words, prefixes and suffixes. I have been studying for hours but when I self test, I am still missing questions. I have written the terms down 10 times each and say them out loud. Next to each term I am writitng a full word so I can relate to it in a sentance. Im just not retaining this!!!! I dont think our instructor is very good. He normally teaches massage therapy. We break every 1/2 hour.....he goes off on tangents, then says, "but that wont be on your test". So why are we wasting valuable time discussing non med term things????? Classes are only 3 hours a night three nights a week. I dont know if I should reduce my hours at work to allow for more study time......Ive been at it for 4 hours now and am still forgetting!!!! Im thinking if I cant get through med term, how will I ever do the LPN program???? Ill check back later to see if anyone has advice. We have a quiz tomorrow and I havent even touched on the planes of the body.........

You guys are AWESOME!!!! Thank you all so much for your support and vote of confidence. Knowing that there will be nurses out there like you all makes it possible to trudge through the time Im having now. Youre right, there are bad apples in all professions! In the past I have found that it was best to keep busy so I wouldnt have time to get involved in the nonsense and thats exactly the approach I am taking in school and will on the job too. This week Ive been in the hospital visiting one of my elderly home care patients and got to meet some wonderful professionals! My cancer patient is also deteriorating at home and unable to manage solid foods. We are getting more support from the agencies involved and have met some very caring nurses and therapists. All of you and all of them have given me much hope this past week. I begin medical terminology next month and have been trying to get a jump start on all those thousands of terms! To pa0723, I agree with the others. Please dont give up!!!! This is our dream and I look at clinicals as the "dues" we have to pay. Youre almost through!!!! Like Kristina told me, keep your eye on your goal and envision yourself working as a nurse. We owe that to ourselves and our future patients.Thanks Kris!!

To RNinMay2005. I certainly didnt mean to offend you, please accept my apology AND my congratulations! You are absolutely right, my post sounded like a gross generalization of all young people and that certainly was not correct nor my intention. My best wishes are with you!!!!

Thank you all so very much for your replies! I am taking every word to heart. Someone had mentioned that if we want to see changes, it should begin with me, .......... I am going to see what I can do with that! If all I can change is my own attitude, I will be the better for it! I have a terminally ill woman close to my age that I care for 6 days a week who is continually dropping little pearls of wisdom in my lap just when I seem to most need them. I have not discussed my doubts with her about becoming a nurse, as she is one of my biggest supporters, however after a nursing visit today, she brought up how different our new nurse is compared to the one we had that wouldnt even make eye contact with her patient. She said, "christina, there are good nurses who really care, and there are those who are probably only doing it for the money who are not very good" Then she told me again how grateful she was for the difference Ive made in her life and that I was going to make a good nurse. THATS what its all about. I am feeling better and do have to accept that there are all kinds of people in this world. My job will be to become the best nurse that I can and learn as I go. My thanks to you all!

I havent even begun my LPN program! Im still working on prereqs and working as an STNA in homecare. Full time LPN program begins in August, but I am rethinking my decision to become a nurse! I hear so much bickering and arguing about RN vs. LPN. I hear so much about how difficult it is to be a "new" nurse because there is no support from the more experienced in the field. Even as an aide in homecare I feel thrown to the wolves out here without nursing support and hear everyday about how this one is better than that one and how so and so is not a proper Christian or that the new nurse on the block is a Lesbian therefore to be shunned by the other nurses. When as an aide, I ask a question about a patient, I am literally sneered at and reminded that Im not a nurse yet! I could go on and on....... THIS is NOT why I decided to become a nurse!!!!! At 46, I guess I am quite naive. I only wanted to become the best LPN that I could. I want to work bedside, preferably in hospice which is where I feel I personally can do the most good. I knew my studies to become an LPN were just the begining and that I would need further experience, training and testing to become a certified hospice nurse. I have no desire to compete with RNs who have more training than I, but rather was looking forward to learning FROM them! One of the reasons I chose hospice was because I thought there would be more commaraderie and less ego nonsense going on. Even in classes its we "oldsters" who seem to really WANT our license and who run circles around the others at clinicals. We dont argue about fairness or break time or about having to change Mrs so and so AGAIN because we did it the last time! Yet at the LTC facility we trained at, it didnt seem to matter even to the staff that we were students and trying to learn not to mention that there were patients to be taken care of. Everyone seemed intent on being the "best" or being in charge and arguing even in front of the residents. PLEASE someone tell me that all facilities are not like this! I am looking for steady long term employment in a facility where I can learn and grow. I want to be part of a team whos main objective is the patients we care for. I am too old for the games and nonsense. Is there a place out there for me where its OK to be "just" an LPN? I think its great that most choose to go on for their RN and they are to be commended for it, but LPN s are an important part of the team too, right? Any feedback or advice will be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

Thank you Katillac!! Thanks also for the awesome link. That provided much needed information. I knew going in to the LPN program that I would need further training. I look forward to joining the ranks of you wonderful Hospice nurses one day. I just hope I make it before its time to retire :chuckle

I took my STNA as a prereq at a local tech school

Thank you all for the positive feedback and encouragement. Bob, I appreciate the reminder to watch my boundaries, and important issue for me! I was not prepared for this assignment and recieved no support from my provider agency, so I have been feeling quite alone out here. Initially it felt good to be so depended on, doing 7 days a week and taking charge. After 6 months I was drained and insisted on one day a week off. We would go months without seeing a nurse. Once I called my nursing supervisor to insist upon a nursing visit. Jane had an infected ingrown toe nail and felt pain in her foot that she has had no feeling in at all for 2 years. When the nurse came out she complained in front of the patient about being called out for a toenail! Later I called my supervisor to report that my patient felt bad "imposing" on this nurse. I suggested that Jane is a human being and not just a toenail! She was in pain, confused and afraid and needed some support from our nursing staff. As an aide, I am not qualified to treat nor diagnose any symptoms.We just got a new case manager and this nurse is awesome, so help has finally arrived and is taking over a great deal of the work I was doing alone. As an STNA, and not even being a nurse yet, I am not qualified to meet all of Janes needs. As a human being, I am not able to meet all of anyones needs! I realize how important it is to be part of a team like you mentioned. Jane will also benefit greatly becoming part of hospice, where she can get more of her needs met and a refreshed staff as well! Thanks again for the support and for listening to me vent!