mflc

I graduated in May 2012 and was accepted into a competitive critical care internship that would then turn into a job on a critical care floor. Long story short, I hated all of it from the beginning, but I knew it was a big deal to have been accepted so I stuck it out in order to add it on my resume for future career opportunities. Critical care is not for me, plain and simple. I have lost 15 pounds in the past month from stress, sleep on average 3 hours a night, and my anxiety has gotten to the point that I have panic attacks when I even think about going into work. I have met with counselors through the EAP, and have appointments to work out some sort of therapy to help the anxiety. However, that is not going to change the nature of the work that my floor expects me to do. So I am in the process of trying to get a transfer to an outpatient clinic, doctors' office, etc. in order to have a slower pace while my anxiety issues get worked out. That being said, I only have 6 months experience working as a registered nurse, and I cannot stand to hear people tell me, "stick it out for one year, then you can do what you want". I understand that within the nursing field, new grads are expected to put in a year or two in med surg or tele in order to become more competent. However, I see no reason to waste that much of my time being unhappy, especially when it has taken a toll on my health, even if it gains me experience. I cannot make it through one more shift, let alone another six months. This also complicates my quitting process. I fully understand that two weeks notice is the best and most respected way to go about leaving, but I physically cannot bring myself to carry out more shifts. My counselor suggested I give a two weeks notice with limitations--such as I can only complete the shifts with a preceptor or through working on a project--so that they decide if I could be helpful in those ways. Chances are, they'll let me go on the spot, but at least I tried to maintain a good professional reputation. The main reason I am posting this is because I know a lot of new grads feel overwhelmed. I needed a reminder that I am in control of my job choice, so maybe this can serve as one for someone else. While it is risky in this job market, I need to consider what is best for me. Any stories related to my situation would be much appreciated!