Hi! Your story sounds so similiar to mine! (except for the passing of a family member i am so sorry to hear). But i know exactly how you feel i graduated a year and a half ago, took the test twice. Thinking of the test gives me anxiety and im so scared to fail again. If you ever want to study together on skype or facetime just let me know! i am willing to try anything to pass!!! studying with other people always seemed to help me the most.