workinghardforit

I know what you mean. However, I am so happy with my decision and I know the right job exists for me and it's not in nursing. I found out last month that I was accepted into the COTA program and I think it will be so much better suited to my needs and temperament than nursing. I ran into one of my nursing school buddies at school last week, and he was about to take his final for Nursing II. He asked what happened to me and why I left. When I explained, he told me, "Good for you. I wish I had left. Now I'm too far in." I could have fallen over, I was so shocked. He said he didn't like it and wasn't happy and wished he had gotten out early. So ladies & gents, sometimes you don't know what something is like until you're in it. There's no shame in trying and learning that your path leads elsewhere.

Hi again. I went ahead and withdrew from the nursing program. You would think I would feel like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders, but I just really felt sad and disappointed. Quitting anything just goes against my grain, but now, 2 wks later, I know I did the right thing, and I don't miss nursing school in the least. However, it's time to figure out my next move. 2 Weeks ago, the day I withdrew, I went to the OT dept. and had a mtg. with the person in charge of their field placements. We talked about my situation, and I was still pretty emotional about the whole thing. She encouraged me to wait a year to apply (deadline for Fall 2011 was Feb. 1) to investigate whether OT was really the direction for me, yada yada yada. I told her that I wasn't new to OT as my daughter received OT from age 2-6 in early intervention, special ed. pre-school, and elementary school. I knew the application required 15 hrs of observation in 3 sites and an essay. The timeframe allowed 1 week to make these appts. and submit everything by Feb. 1. As it turned out, I called some people I knew in the field, ( a neighbor who is an OT, my daughters pre-school, and another site), and was able to do the observations and submit them with the essay on time. Even though I have a 3.8 I think I may get rejected because of my last-minute application and the fact that this woman knows I was distraught over leaving nursing school and may think I am making a snap decision by applying so quickly (which I am). There are 24 spots for the fall. ANYWAY, I enjoyed the observations, I think being a COTA would be both interesting and rewarding without all the crazy stress I encountered in nursing. Is it what I was meant to do? Not sure about that. However, I have the next six months to think about things and really investigate what I want to do. I may go back to my roots. I have a BA in English and I loved being a freelance reporter but it didn't pay well. I am going to spend time looking into jobs involving writing and see what turns up. THank you all for your advice. You are a very caring and comforting group. I wish you all well.:heartbeat:heartbeat

THank you all for your well thought out replies. I appreciate all your viewpoints. I had a long (and tearful) talk with my instructor and the Department Chair about my misgivings. I think that the poster who implied that perhaps I am afraid definitely right on several fronts. In my school, 2nd semester is the make or break point for most. I am definitely afraid of skill testing. I am extremely afraid of bumbling through clinical. I certainly do not want to fail out. I have to admit that. That being said, I don't think I am getting out of nursing what I need to feel good about myself and my work. I know how many avenues are available in nursing, and not everything has to be Med/Surg, but you certainly need to start there. I know how miserable I was. I loved lecture, but hated the hands-on part, and let's face it, the classroom is left behind after grad. I think part of me will wonder, unless I find the perfect job that makes me happy. I'm working on that. The Department Chair was lovely to me. She told me she'd take me back next year if I change my mind, and she'll recommend me for whatever my next move is. For now, I just have to grieve this loss, and move on. I hope when I get over my sadness and disappointment (not to mention my guilt over quitting), that I will have no regrets, and can take all the great information I learned in that 1st semester, and use it to benefit my own life and future work. Thank you all. Good luck. I'll let you know how things go.

Hi. I'm about to quit nursing school. It's my 2nd semester of an ADN program. I had a 4.0 on my pre-reqs, and I worked so hard first semester and got a B+. I felt so much anxiety toward the end of the semester, and when we started clinicals, I kept getting that nagging feeling of "this isn't for me." The stress and anxiety I was facing was incrfedible, and I am crying and not sleeping at night. I went with nursing because I wanted a career that was both lucrative and meaningful, but I wasn't prepared for the amount of stress and liability involved in patient care. Is it stupid to say, "this isn't what I thought it would be?" Now i'm totally freaked out. I'm 45 years old, and I feel so sad and disappointed because I just don't want to be a nurse. I really thought that I had a direction. I stayed home with my children for 16 years (the youngest is 10), and now I feel like I haven't got anything to show for it professionally. Other women my age who stayed working while raising kids now have established careers. I feel like a loser, and someone who doesn't even know her own mind. A real mid-life crisis, I'm afraid. My husband is not happy with my decision to leave. He was counting on the salary I would make as an RN, although I truly wonder how many facilities are hiring RNs without a BSN. I'm looking into a COTA program at my school. I think it may afford me the ability to establish more of a relationship with patients (in nursing it seems that there is such a rush to move on to the next thing that you barely have time to relate to the patients) in a less stressful environment. Of course the pay isn't as good, but I don't think I could stand that high level of stress over, "Did I miss something, did I forget something, did I make a mistake?" What do you all think? I guess I'm looking for validation of my decision, because I just keep going round and round and confusing myself.

Thanks to both, and llg, I think you hit it when you said that it might be the learner role that I don't like. I do like meeting and interacting with the patients, and caring for them, however, I sometimes feel nervous and flustered about doing things efficiently and utilizing the correct techniques. I become anxious that the instructor will "catch" me doing something against procedure. At my age, I am used to feeling comfortable and in control of myself and my actions, but in nursing I feel like I'm speaking a different language on a different planet. I have a friend in my clinical group who is my age and has my same reservations and feelings about clinical. She said she is being criticized also about her assessments, PPE, etc. , but the instructor told her she thinks she will be a good nurse. The instructor did not even come close to saying anything complimentary about me. I know nurses need to be tough, but I take things very personally. After clinical it takes a couple of days for me to stop pounding on myself and snap out of my cloud of disappointment and angst. Then I tell myself that I'm capable and I can get through this. However, sometimes I ask myself, "Why? Do I really want to do this kind of work?". Maybe I just need to take my Xmas break and decompress and think hard about what to do. Thanks, though. You did help me.

Hi. I am hoping someone can share their thoughts on my situation. I am 45 and in ADN program. I have a BA in English and I went back for nursing because I want to re-enter the workforce after being a Stay-at-home mom for 16 years. Nursing always interested me, but I thought I didn't have the aptitude for science when I was younger. My husband and others encouraged me to give it a try, there's so many opportunities and directions with nursing, blah blah blah. Went to school part time for pre-reqs and loved it (4.0 GPA). I'm finishing my first semester of the actual program and I'm hating it. I love the classroom portion and I have a B+ but I'm sucking at clinical. I dread clinincal every week. I get the smackdown from my instructor (but always new mistakes, never the same), and I 'm finding that other students don't get criticized for the same mistakes I make. I'm tired of feeling stupid and clumsy. My instructor is knowledgable, but condescending to the point where I don't want to ask her anything during care. I ask good questions during pre-conference, things other students don't know but won't ask. They'd rather sit there and not know than ask why a repair on an aortic aneurism might cause acute pancreatitis. I'm feeling that this isn't for me. Am I being too hard on myself or should I go with my gut and get out? I just feel that Nursing 2 (next semester) will be even more difficult and intense and I just don't know if I should pursue nursing when I dispise clinical so much. Thoughts from others will be helpul. Thanks.