Louisepug

This is gonna be a long one so forgive me for my ranting. Anyway, I haven't posted on here in ages, I guess I've just been plain disgusted with the whole nursing field. Where do I start? I've been an RN now for a year and a half, but have not worked as one that entire time. The first job I took was on a geriatric-psychiatric unit, lets just say, I think that experience scarred me for life, in fact I'm working with the Human Rights Commission to try to get the unit shut down. Never in my life have I seen more abuse, misuse of power, insensitivity, and just plain horror on a unit. Nurses yelling at dementia patients, electroshock therapy against the will of an old man (yes!)Patients in seclusion against will without documentation, and I found two men once who were almost strangled by velcro vests put on improperly in a chair!! During my time on this unit I feel that I displayed an immense amount of compassion and hard work towards my patients and their families, and never once was this recognized by my boss. What WAS recognized was the fact that I had to miss quite a bit of work due to numerous things. One, I pulled my back out moving a patient so was out a few days for that, then I developed debilitating chronic daily headaches and migraines (which I still have), and I had to check into a mental health unit myself for a week for severe depression. Yet, I came back to the job and persisted at it until I could take no more and accepted a job as a hospice nurse. I gave my 2 weeks notice, but my nurse manager said "the next day can be your last." She was a nasty, horrid woman. So, off I went to do my hospice job, which mind you, I didn't know I'd be "case managing" when I came on board. The job description was entirely vague. I envisioned myself at dying peoples bedsides comforting them and using my nursing skills, but NO! This was pure administration, and paperwork out the wazoo!!! Talk about zero job satisfaction. I didn't work my butt off in school to be a paperwork nurse, so I gave them a proper 2 weeks and left. At this job I apparently also called in sick a lot according to my past supervisor. Well, I WAS SICK!!! So now here I am, jobless, living off inheritance money which is quickly running out and I don't know what to do. I am a good person with so much compassion in my heart but I am disgusted by this field called "nursing." It's not nursing, it's just corporate America, money hungry at a sick persons will. I've thought that there are possibly 2 fields I could handle, labor and delivery or cosmetic surgery nursing, but considering my past illnesses...who's going to hire me?? I am so depressed over what has happened. Someone please help. should I try something else in nursing, and what do I do about the past jobs? Or should I do something completely new?? Any and all help is so appreciated.

Thank you all so much for your replies. It really does help to hear the different perspectives on this. Aimee, I do agree with what you are saying about the calm before the storm. The patients I have ARE really stable so it just feels like I'm doing the same thing every day as of now. On the other hand, someone mentioned inpatient, and I feel maybe I would like that better. More "immediate gratification?" Anyway, We'll see what happens. I'll let you all know. Thanks so much again...:loveya:

Hello everyone. I am in desperate need of advice. In fact I am so in need I have fumbled around with the idea of leaving the nursing field all together because I am so disappointed in it!! It is not what I thought it was going to be. Here is my story in a nutshell: I excitedly graduated nursing (RN) school 1 year ago. Since then I have had 2 jobs already! My first one was in geri-psych, which I really loved. I felt like I was an advocate for my patients, I bonded with them, laughed with them and cried with them. The problem was, I am a very small woman and there was a lot of lifting and moving people with strokes, etc and I did some MAJOR damage to my back, to the point now where I'm only 29 and I'm on baclofen and vicodin per day because of the chronic pain! So I left there and applied to a local hospice thinking I would love it because it had a psych component to it and I love to provide palliative/comfort care, teach, and I am all for the Hospice philosophy. I always believed I'd end up working hospice, just maybe not so soon. So, I went into it thinking it was going to be like that book, "final gifts." I thought I'd be hand holding, praying with patients, giving palliative meds and nursing care, but this is not so!! I am a case manager. At first when I was told about this position I felt pretty proud of myself, here I was a new grad making more money than my fellow nursing friends and with a prestigous title. Well, I am sooo disappointed with this position. My day consists of seeing 4 patients in either facilities or homes, taking their vitals, checking for pain, and breifly chatting and the charting the same amount of time I spent with the patient. I then get in my car and drive to the next place and do it again.BORING! There is so little patient care in this job...it's administrative! Is this what "Hospice" is? Glorified paperwork nurse? Would I like inpatient hospice better or should I just go back to psych or maybe LTC? I became a nurse so I could bond with my patients, do nursing tasks and make a difference...not write notes on them all day long repeating the same things week to week. Please help, I'm so fed up and unfulfilled!!! Thank you.:trout:

Hello fellow nurses! I am a soon to be graduate RN July 14th. The last few weeks I've been feeling what many may call cold feet, fear, exhaustion,spring fever, whatever. The point is, all of a sudden I'm questioning so much. I did not expect this to happen right before graduation. See, I already have a job lined up after graduating at a very reputible(?) pediatric hospital that I really fell in love with the first time I did clinicals there. They just have it all together, and I love that. The drawback is (and this is really odd to me, seeing that they're probably the wealthiest hospital in the city), that the pay for new grads is in my opinion ridiculously low...18.75/hr. There is opportunity for shift diffrential (4.00) but, still, for the hard work that we do as nurses, it seems like there should be better pay. I guess I'm just wondering if I jumped the gun, so to speak, too quickly with this hospital, and if I shouldn't look around for a better paying job. I was even contemplating pharm. sales rep. the past few days, but did some research and found that even if you are a 2 year degree RN you STILL must have your bachelors. Plus, in some ways, I'd feel like a sell-out to the nursing proffession, and I really do love nursing.I just want to be able to afford to live comfortably and feel like I'm getting paid what I deserve. Should I look into traveling/local agency work, or do you need at least a years experience for that? Is 18.75 normal? (I live in Cincinnati, OH. btw.) I feel like I sound greedy, because I surely didn't go into this field for the money. BUT, now that my time has come, I feel like I'd be more motivated about this if I were getting paid more. Does anyone out there have any suggestions for me? I would so very much appreciate it (I always do!) Thanks! L

Hello everyone.I am a soon to be RN grad this July and have a HUGE interest in travel nursing. I am single, no kids, and love to see new things (get bored easily!) I'm getting ready to accept my first RN job at a large Children's hospital in my hometown and plan on working there for 2 years. My question is, are there a plentiful amount of traveling pediatric nursing jobs throughout the country (including Hawaii, Virgin Islands) or does this specialty limit my future assignments as a possible travel nurse. Would I be better of starting on an adult med surg floor or something like that? I just want to be able to be "marketable" when I'm ready to travel! Any advice is much appreciated. Thanks!

Again, thanks everyone for your replies. Its been kind of an upsetting week as far as this decision goes. It seems like everyone and anyone in nursing that I tell I want to possibly go into psych, I get a negative comment. Have you all noticed that some people view psych nursing as "not real nursing?" In my graduating class, if you are not applying for the critical care internship for ICU etc. then it's almost like you are looked down on. Oh well, I went to school to become an RN, not to win a popularity contest.

Thanks for your responses! I just went back into my med-surg rotation for the first time in over 10 weeks, and I have to say, psych is REALLY looking tempting! I am just not a fan of adult med-surg nursing. More power to those who love it though, they are special people!:)

Hi everyone. Okay, so, I graduate in 5 months but I'm a little confused right now. I just finished my psych rotation and absolutely loved it (I knew I would.) My instructor told me I "exceeded the mental health rotation expectations," and that I adapted very naturally to the psych nurse role. I have always had really good commmunication skills and have had an interest in psych my entire life. So, the thing is I was originally planning on going into pediatric med-surg right out of school. I really like our Children's hospital, and felt I'd learn a lot there. But, now I'm having second thoughts and feel like maybe I should just go with what I have a natural ability towards. What if I do go into psych first, but then decide I want to work med-surg 3 years from now? Would I be able to take some kind of refresher course in med-surg skills or would the staff on a med floor just kind of help me ease back in. Would I have a hard time even getting a job in another area of nursing if I do psych first? I know there are a lot of questions, but I need your help! Thanks!

Hi. I've tried multiple anti-depressants, and so far in my opinion, lexapro has been the best for my anxiety=depression. It does make me VERY tired, so my doc switched me from taking it in the morning to taking it at night instead. It also has caused sexual side effects, but it seems like they all do. That whole thing is a vicious cycle. Go off the anti-depressant=orgasms, but anxiety/depression. Stay on the medication=no orgasm, but calmness in life. Oh well, I think we all know that life ain't a bowl of cherries. I'd like to eventually be off anti-depressants all together and see if I can handle life drug free.

Thanks everyone. :) I actually sent the teacher an email last night. He was pretty reassuring in his response. I think my class is going to get some kind of study group together for this. I know I can do it, I'm just going to have to sweat bullets to do it!

Thanks everyone. :) I actually sent the teacher an email last night. He was pretty reassuring in his response. I think my class is going to get some kind of study group together for this. I know I can do it, I'm just going to have to sweat bullets to do it!

Hi everyone, Haven't posted in awhile, but, my first quarter in nursing school is over and now I just started back into nursing 2. Everyone told us how much harder this quarter would be, but this is ridiculous. I think I've cried almost everyday since last week ! It's not the nursing class that's difficult for me, it's pharmacology, and A and P, particularly the nervous system. I read for these classes, I ask questions, but usually about midway through the class I feel like I'm listening to someone speaking japanese! I get totally overwhelmed and the tears well up. Everyone else agrees that the phram teacher is way over our heads (he's new this year) but no one is saying anything. I've tried asking him questions but he can't even "dumb" those answers down enough for me. I'm just feeling so down on myself, like I'm just not smart enough to be an RN. I want this more than anything, but what if I just don't have the intelligence for all this technical stuff? I mean, I know I'm intelligent in other areas. I can analyze difficult literature and poetry like it's second nature, and write a 20 page paper with no problem. I just hate feeling incompetent, and am SO afraid of drowning and then failing out of nursing school. Does anyone have any advice of what I can do to try to understand these complex chemistries in the body? I've even spent over 100 dollars on those "dummy" books, but they just don't go into enough detail for what were doing. PLEASE HELP!! Thanks, Louisepug

Thanks guys! Will call Doc tomorrow~ :)

Hi guys, I have a question about bee stings that I was hoping someone could answer. When I was a child I was told that I had allergies to bee stings. I remember getting stung on my knee once when I was five and I broke out in really bad hives that the doc said could have gone into my throat. I'm 26 now, and ironically have not been stung since. Really I have no idea what would happen if I did get stung now, but I still assume I'm still allergic and could break out in hives that possibly lead to fatality. The reason I'm all of a sudden concerned about this is because I am going camping this weekend and my boyfriend is concerned that if I were to get stung by a bee the nearest hospital is an hour away. I've never had one of those epi-pens, and have gone camping before, but have not been stung. I guess he got me thinking and now I'm concerned on what I should do. Should I just go and not worry about it, like before, or should I find out about getting an epi-pen? How do I get one of those anyway? Sorry about such a long post! Thanks for your advice everyone. :) Louisepug

Thanks so much for your reply futureRNmichael :) ! I had a second interview today, so it looks like I got the job. I am very excited for the challenge that psych nursing offers. Have to admit though, that I am a little scared though. How often do aides get assulted by patients; particularly the ones in there for homicidal tendencies? :uhoh21: Thanks again! Louisepug

Hi! I have a job interview at a hospital for a psych aide position on Friday (yay!) I have a few questions about it. First of all, since I'd like to become a psych nurse, I feel that this position will give me good experience for that; but what EXACTLY are the duties of a psych aide? I have somewhat of an idea, but would love it if someone could give me a good description of what this job is like. Also, any tips for the interview on Friday? Thanks so much everyone! :)

Hi everyone! I just have a question about what I should or can be doing to best prepare myself for nursing school in September. All of a sudden I'm feeling a little scared about my schedule. I mean, I know I can do it, I just feel like theres got to be something that I can be doing right now while it's still summer to get ahead and prepare myself. I have nursing one and a and p on monday. Tuesday I have clinicals all day. Wednesday I have a and p lab. Thursday is nursing 1 again, and Friday I have pharm math (I am scared of math!) I also need to work 24 hours a week and find time to study. Will I have time at all for a social life? I guess I'll just have to be super organized about my time. If any of you have some advice for me that would be great! :) Thanks.

Funny, that's how I felt too after living in Chicago (the actual city) for 4 years! I just moved back here 3 weeks ago and it feels good. Don't know if I'll stay here FOREVER (still feel a pull towards San Diego :) ) but for now, it's home and where the heart is.

Wow. What an amazing story! I got chills when I read it. Did you have any NDE's since you were brain dead? What was it like? If you don't want to talk about it here, you can PM me. I'd love to here more about it, as I find your story very inspiring. Louisepug

What beautifully, inspiring posts. I definatley feel a call towards Hospice nursing. I have been volunteering now for a few months with a local Hospice, and can't wait until the day comes each week when I go and visit my patients. Sometimes, I think I get more out of it then they do! :) It is truly a special, and blessed field to be called towards.

There is a book that I just bought that I am almost done with that you all should read. I don't know if anyone already mentioned it, as I didn't read ALL these threads. The book is called, "Stiff, The curious lives of human cadavers," by Mary Roach. It is a fascinating book, and it does address this topic in one of the chapters. As for my opinion, yes, I would talk to a comatose person and also a "brain dead" patient or corpse. In my opinion, as others have stated, there is still so much that we don't know about the brain and death, so what can it hurt? If the dead can hear us then at least they will feel more comforted in their transition. If not, I look at it as I am still sending positive energy out there, and how can that be bad? :) Louisepug

As far as "intimatly" (sp?) involved goes, as in dating your patient, I would say no way! It just doesn't seem very proffessional to me. As far as being very involved with that persons care and sincerely taking an interest in their lives, I would say, of course! I think this type of closeness would probably be developed more easily in LTC, because you are with the residents everyday. If it's just general med-surg type nursing, it seems that if the person is only in the hospital for a few days, you wouldn't really have time to get too close. Personally, I volunteer with hospice and I have really formed a close bond with my 2 patients. I'm moving in a few weeks to another state and will really miss them! How do you not form a close bond to someone when you visit them each week and really get to know them?

I'm really confused! Ae you guys talking about the state boards to be a CNA or the in-class testing? I have my state boards on the 18th and from what I understood it's just written. No one mentioned having to do hands on stuff during the state test?! Am I incorrect or just confused? Thanks guys. Louisepug :)

Hi all, I actually took a phlebotomy class last semester, in hopes that it would help me in nursing school in the fall. We practiced drawing blood on each other every week! It did not feel good and was a bit scary, but I have to say, I think it will help me now that I've done it on a real live person. As far as bathing goes, we did this in my CNA class. We were clothed but "pretended" to bathe one another. When I actually had to give a real bed bath for the first time to a patient (who was male by the way ) I was terrified! I got through it, and now it's second nature. Funny thing though, and thank God were in nursing school now, because my CNA instructer, who was in nursing school back in the sixties, said that back then they had to give each other enemas!! :uhoh21: WOW! Now THAT would be emabarrasing! Louisepug

Thanks for responding Traci! That was very helpful. :)