joaniej231

I agree that knowing when to call is an art and kind of a science too, and there have been many times when I have regretted calling a physician after being reamed out.Personally, I think it could have waited until the am, but you did what you thought was the right thing to do and I commend you for that. it wasn't the end of the world for that doctor to take that call but getting screamed at is something that I do try to avoid because it upsets my "kharma" and my "kharma" is sacrosanct. I try at all costs to avoid those kind of confrontations for my own personal protection, and I always make my decision based on what is best for the patient.

How illegal is that? Blatant racial discrimination and you could have really gone to town legally on that one. i never heard of anything so "In your face" as that. Wow must have been a war zone in that place. You were very smart to tender your resignation immediately,walk out that door and not look back.

Again, I will say, a patient does not have to be "mental" to be disgruntled. Anyone who has born the brunt of rudeness, inconsiderate behavior, etc etc knows how that feels. It's not pleasant, it makes one angry. If there is a not so great outcome attached to that rudeness, it does not take a mental patient to think about a lawsuit or at least talking to an attorney. I say that because I handle malpractice suits everyday and well treated patients do not sue. Patients with good outcomes do not sue. The combination of the two aforementioned problems a law suit does make. And I believe it goes back to the basics of good nursing care and compassion, empathy and decent manners don't hurt either.

It is not necessarily true that "people who want to sue have other issues", Anytime a "customer" is disgruntled, they often times want to retaliate, because of the way they were treated by staff. They could have been kept from their loved one, or talked to in a less than courteous manner. Just because we are "Professionals" does not mean that we should lose our manners and sense of decency. We are not the only people who work in high stress jobs. You didn't see "Sully" the US Air pilot lose it when his plane was crashing. He kept his cool and got the job done. That's first class professionalism.

Yes, it can all be very annoying and we think it frivolous and a waste of our valuable time, and it probably is in the entire scope of our responsibilities BUT and this is a big BUT, patients will not hesitate to sue you, the hospital, and anyone else that they feel has not treated them with the utmost dignity and respect. The number one reason patients sue has to do with the way they are treated, and although I do not use that as a barometer of how I treat my patients, I do think it is worthwhile to at least consider the implications. If a patient is angry because they feel ignored or neglected, and then something goes wrong, you can bet your bottom dollar, they will be looking to cause trouble. And if anyone has ever been deposed in a civil case, it is very scary and unpleasant, and something I would definitely try to avoid. I mention all of this because it is true and even though we might like to drop kick that pain in the butt down the hall, it would be in your best interest to smile, and do your utmost to be the best that you can be.

To Ghillbert, It's called "prioritizing"!! And making choices, it's what nursing is all about. Using your skills to make decisions regarding life and death every day, every hour, every minute. So if one of her patients falls and cracks their head open, she should keep going with her 5 R's, because that is what the books say. What kind of experience do you have? Of course you have to make sure you have the correct patient and the correct med, and you have to plow along until the meds are given, but you cannot work in a bubble without any distractions.You wouldn't be doing your job. It's called multitasking. We all have to do it, and it takes experience and intelligence to be able to prioritize. What I was trying to say is that instead of criticizing and chastising, offer her suggestions as to how to get the job done (med pass), run her unit, give direction to the ancillary personnel and in the meantime get those sneakers on so she can run away from that place before something bad happens.She does not have to work like that. She can makes choices, the world is her oyster. She is probably young, enthusiastic, full of energy, and now is time to make the decision not to come down to that level of nursing. And yes, I do know for a fact that we nurses eat our young. I don't understand why but we do. I was a DON at a 120 bed SNF and I specifically hired new grads because of the reasons I just stated. They wanted to prove themselves, they were bright, ambitious and wanted to be the best that they could be, and they received all the support they needed and every single one of them became top notch. I don't claim to have all the answers, but we must mentor our new nurses and build them up not break them down. Oh and by the way, not sure what "snarky" is but it doesn't sound good, I am just trying to have a healthy debate and really and truly meant nothing personal, I am sure your intentions are very noble and for that I tip my hat to you.

funsizeliv, Remember one very important thing- noone is indispensable- noone. If you go, there will be someone else to take your place faster than you can bat an eye. Noone is irreplacable and if you think that is not true, you are sadly mistaken.

dorimar Amen to what you said. My sentiments exactly. OP received a gentle reprimand when she was asking for support and advice. That reply from ghillbert is from an overbearing new grad eater, which I have seen many many times over the years, and what typifies what has been wrong and what continues to be woefully wrong with this very noble profession. Give the poor girl a break. You don't think she knows how to give meds properly? Of course she does, that is basic bare bones nursing. That wasn't her problem, it was all the other stuff that interfered with being able to properly administer the medication. There is not enough mentoring of new nurses. That DON of that facility typifies the mentality of many nurses. Let them fly by the seat of their pants and then be right there to chop off their heads when they screw up. Like I said earlier,she should get out of there as quickly as possible and don't look back, keep running until you are somewhere where you are valued and respected. Those places do exist.

Also, the elitist who said the med error should never have happened is living in la la land. With 18 patients she is lucky she got any meds right for any patient on that unit. That is outrageous staffing and outrageous leadership. You need to look for a hospital that is organized in the "UNion" kind of way. They do not tolerate any of that nonsense and that is what it is. Total ridiculousness. Don't chastise her for not following the dispensing policy, give her encouragement and support instead. You don;t think she knows how to give meds. She is totally overwhelmed, she needs to breathe and have a lunch and maybe even take a break.

This sounds dreadful for you and I would be looking else where for a job where nurses are held in higher esteem. It sounds to me like you are way overworked and stressed and they are lucky that there wasn't a worse error or multiple errors. you sound very conscientious and I applaud your professionalism. I would get out of there before they eat you alive and If by some idiotic chance they decide to terminate you, consider yourself lucky. You should have no trouble finding a new job and remember, they need you much more than you need them. There is a huge chronic shortage of RNs and you are a very valuable commodity and don't forget that. You approach them with the attitude that you have valuable service and THEY NEED YOU. You did nothing wrong, they overwork you and cause mayhem. Remember that. I have been in nursing for a million years and I know of what I speak. Hold your head high and remember your tremendous value. You are a jewel and if they let you go they are fools.

rninmi and others, Please be careful about feeling "punky". It is so simple and effortless to become so self assured that the next thing you know you are taking something because"just one time won't do anything". Been there done that on more than one occasion. I was on such close monitoring not only from the board but also a probation officer, who was up my butt all the time. And I was defiant as hell, well, he was a total pig, very nasty and condescending which was the last thing I needed. I had such self loathing, I certainly did not need some arrogant bastard telling me how horrible I was. But, thank God that all ended. But the thoughts and cravings did not stop, I have to be on top of those cravings at all times. The idea of running is fantastic. Keep that up! I truly believe that only another addict "gets it". Noone could possibly understand what it is like, unless you have been there. Those homeless people that started running, occured in Philadelphia which is where I live (suburbs). A young girl started getting sneakers for them and she gave them a sense of purpose and genuinely cared about them, and so it went from there. And they would all run together. She was up for a humanitarian award on 360 Anderson Cooper. I am so glad for this web site and to have the opportunity to vent and talk with other addicts who are nurses. Peace be with you. Joanne

Jack, I stopped trying to get people to understand a long time ago, starting with my ex husband. He really" didn't get it". He started treating me like I was an invalid and mental defect. But I stopped with the blame game a long time ago. He truly did not understand and it is what drove our marriage into the "rocks". As far as my children are concerned, that has been difficult. It has taken time for them to see that I am much better now, The good thing is that it is all in the past now, but it took a long time to make things right with them. I don't feel that I owe anyone an explanation about my drug addiction. It is what it is and the good thing is that actions do speak louder than words and I live by that crede every day of my life, that is not to say I am perfect, God only knows I am not, but I do not use any mood altering substances anymore. Of course I wish my life had been different, I think about that every day, but the reality is that I cannot change it. I guess I have forgiven myself finally after much self loathing and disgust. And I am pretty fragile still but am on firm footing. I disappointed alot of people who thought I was super woman and super nurse. So it's kind of a matter of reassessment and self acceptance. My faith in a higher power helps with it too. I am one of these people who worries about what other people think and so I am kind of paranoid, and like being in the background as opposed to being the center of attention like I once used to be. All in all my life is not too bad right now. I have reestablished my relationships with my kids. The anger and hatred that I had for my ex has dissipated for the most part. Well, that is ongoing, depending on what he does and says, he can be really vile at times. But that is because he does not understand about addiction, never has, never will. And he has remarried and lives 500 miles away from me. I see and hear about people every day who have turned their lives around so I know it is do able. Of course I wish none of this had happened but it did and here I am fighting my way back. I do live my life one day at a time and I make a conscious decision every day to try to be happy and positive. Some days it is easier than others. I thank you for listening to me and taking an interest in me. God knows I need all the help I can get. Thank You Jack and others who are listening. Joanne

Jack, Thanks for your advice. I've been thinking alot and I know my decision not to reenter nursing is the right one. I did indeed lose my license and attempted once to get reinstated and although I had months of urine tests and documented attendance at NA/AA meetings and ongoing counseling, they rejected me because I had one brief lapse in meeting attendance and not a good enough explanation of the reason for the lapse. But I think I am going to pursue a career in drug and alcohol counseling. Villanova University has certificate courses that can be completed on a Friday evening and all day Saturday. The position is for a"Certified Allied Addictions Counselor". The reason for this choice is that it does not require a BS which I do not have since I graduated from a 3 year diploma program in 1971, but does require hours of class and an internship. Any way, I knew when I read about the offerings at Villanova, I immediately knew that this is something I could do. I can also network with others that are pursuing this line of work. For the first time in months I feel hopeful and that I have found something that I can do and do really well. Eventually, I wouldn't mind working with impaired nurses, since I have been to hell and back and been through it all and can offer alot of insight. I would appreciate hearing back from you as to what you think about this and if you have any suggestions or comments. Thanks. Peace be with you. Joanne

Thank you East Texas and Jack for your words of encouragement and advice. I have thought about counseling, I know that I would have to go back to school which I wouldn't mind at all except for the expense of it. I really think by not going back to nursing, it is saving my life. I have struggled with this decision for quite a while. It is very difficult to admit that nursing is no longer an option for me. It makes me sad and also, I look at the salary I could be making and cringe. I have a grown son and an 18 year old daughter who is in her freshman year of college and I would like to be able to give her everything she needs. I also live with an elderly parent and do the same stuff as you Jack, in exchange for a roof over the head. It works pretty well and I am grateful.I don't look back anymore and berate myself for the past because it is useless and my self esteem is not the greatest. The past is unchangable and when I tell you I screwed up, that is an understatement. I lost license, home, children, husband and every other finite thing you can think of. It has taken quite a while for me to feel half way decent again about myself. Sometimes I feel like a coward for not attempting to reenter the profession. Family members are cool but don't understand why I don't go back, they don't get the idea of relapsing. They think I should just buck up and do it. Thanks alot for responding, I am always amazed that there are people just like me with the same kinds of experiences. It is reassuring and comforting to know I am not alone. Now, I just have to find some lifes work that pays, is rewarding and that I love. Jack , I know of a guy here in Pa (eastern part of the state), nurse anesthetist, who has devoted his life to helping other nurses, it sounds very similar to what you are doing. He speaks and is involved in policy formation etc. Thanks again. Maybe someday I'll tell my story if anyone wants to hear it. Joanne

Jack, you say the "profession" was a trigger. So, did you relinquish your profession and if so what do you do now for a living? I too have a similar sounding history and I am in the throes of trying to decide what to do for the rest of my working career. I am 58 years old and have practiced nursing for over 30 years. I fear returning to nursing because I don't think I could resist the temptation. I was a top notch nurse and have great pride about the nursing profession. I am currently without a license and have been floundering, bouncing from menial job to menial job, totally unfulfilled and restless. I'm sober and clean. So I guess the question is, what do I do for the rest of my working life, when it appears that nursing is not an option? Thanks Joanne