carroll

thanks siri

I can't answer these questions and i'm having trouble finding stuff on google, clearly i'm not searching right. Can anyone point me to a good website or suggest a good book? I know there are going to be ore questions i can't answer but if i can get the information from somewere reliable that would be great. My friend, 55 female, has just been diagnosed as having type two diabetes. She has been told she can control it by diet and told to cut out sugar and salt. She has seen a diabetic nurse once and has a follow up in 6 months time. Her blood sugar averages between 5 and 8 (uk measuring i now you use a different measurement in america) apparently. She wants to know what harm a spoonful of sugar on for example a bowl of strawberries will do. Does she have to cut all sugar and all salt out? Can she use artifical sweetners instead of sugar? What are the likely long term effects if she doesn't cut sugar out completly? Thanks in advance for any help/answers.

NurseBaby'05, there wouldn't be any point in changing my numbers, other friends would give them to her. I do however have caller id and an answer phone :) Cat123, sorry your having problems getting help.

That is exactly what i did a couple of years ago with another friend, she was diagnosed as borderline i later found out, but i could not deal with all her games and she wasnt a close friend. This friend is treading on very thin ice at the moment, i cannot keep allowing her to break boundaries i set for my own well being but i am very reluctant to walk away while she is having a hard time, though i have been backing off a lot over the past year. It took me a long time to spot the manipulations and mind games she was playing, or maybe i just did not want to see them, either way i have bene pointing out to her for the past 6 or so months when i catch her at it. She knows i do not like it, and today i ahve told her that if it does not stop, or if she does not start to make an effort to change her attitude/behaviour then i would not continue to be her friend. I agonised over that decision before telling her, i know what it feels like to be extremely depressed and suicidal and be dumped by your friends, i had vowed i would never do that to a friend. On the other hand i have given her as much of my time and energy as i am able. I have set boundaries around unanounced visits, and calling 20 times until i give in and answer the phone. I have spent the last two years listening to her and her woes, making sugestions as to what might be helpful etc etc. I am not a mental health nurse, nor a counselor or whatever. I have compassion and empathy, but i can only take so much. I am fed up of watching her turn down professional help, skip appointments, refuse to take prescribed meds, playing games with everyone around her, and having tantrums when she doesnt get her own way. I am hopeing that this time she see's the light so to speak. She is going into a psychiatric ward again (i dont think they gave her much choice following this weekend). If she makes the most of it and starts to work with them and the community teams she has access to then no i wont walk away from her, yet. Unfortunatley i honestly don't believe her when she says she will make use of them. I have heard it all before and do not want to hear it anymore after this time. I am at this point incredibly thankful that she is a friend and not a member of my family i would be compelled to stick wiht and deal with. If i need to i can dissapear from her life, and then figure out how to deal with the guilt for doing so. Thank you for all your advice especially not knowing many of the facts.

thanks, was a silly question really, its never possible to tell i guess. if she doesnt want to accept professional help then i cant do anything more than what i do/have already done. ive reinforced and set other boundaries again, i hadnt thought to tell her that next time i wont stick around, i will do that as enough really is enough.

How do you know (as a friend not as a nurse) when a threat is real? Is it possible? If said perosn has a history of claiming to have overdosed but hasnt according to blood tests and having had her stomach pumped, how do you know when this time she is for real? Is it best to call paramedics every single time and feed her drama or to tell her to seek medical help and hope she does, she is an adult, its her choice and not your responsibility? And how do you set boundaries around such threats when they are ignored despite you not running when wolf has been cried?