Herc1201

I wanted to come back and reply to these comments after all this time to give an update. I did it. There were days I felt like quitting, days where I couldn't even figure out why I should keep going. It was honestly one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I went through a lot of it on my own working, going to school, and dealing with everything internally at the same time. I still remember reading your comments back then and wondering if I was actually capable of doing this. I made this post when I felt like I was at my lowest, but I can say now that I pushed through. I passed my exit exam and I'm officially graduating from the program. Next stop is the NCLEX, and hopefully becoming an ED nurse. Thank you to everyone who took the time to comment and offer support when I needed it most, it meant more than you probably realize.

Sorry every one this is my first post, I'm currently in my second semester of nursing program and finals week is coming up quick. My gf of 6 years left me two months ago and I'm still feeling it as if it just happened I haven't been able to study and all my assignments have been subpar at best. I even thought about quitting, everything I have done to this point has been for us and it hard to switch my mindset to it being for my future. After getting home from work she just told me she was moving back in with her mom becuase I wasn't doing enough, I wasn't taking her out much and apparently I didn't like going to the gym with her. That I let the relationship die. I begged for her to stay and asked if there was some one else and she had said no. I have so much regret at this point becuase maybe she is right I could have done more but I priotized school and work. The worst part for me was the next day after the breakup I seen her with a guy at the gym and I remember that it was the same person I had seen prior to the breakup I questioned her but I had so much trust in her I just believed he was no one. Come to find out she moved on with this person yet I still tried for a whole month asking for another chance I finally was able to stop but it takes so much for me to not contact her any more. At this point I'm just lost I have no drive, we had plans to get married and have kids. But I guess this whole time she was all ready moving on and I just never noticed. Even with the holidays coming up it's been rough I haven't studied since the breakup,. And I don't even know how I'm going to get through my finals. Even now I can't get out of bed and even if I do I just think about her and that guy being together. I blame myself so much I should have done more.. it's just hard knowing she has completely moved on and is happy while I feel stuck and alone. I'm sorry for the long post I just wish I had my focus back I was doing so good in the beginning and now it feels like it's all falling apart