I'm sorry that things are not going well. I have worked in a couple of different ORs and they all have been the same. It usually takes at least a year to become baseline competent and a solid 2-2.5 to get good at certain things. It will get better. In the OR we are all a little bit crazy. My suggestion is if there is a particular person that is giving you grief pull them to the side and ask them what they think that you could specifically improve on. If you try to do things their way for a while they can't be mad at you. You have enough experience in nursing that you can add value to their department. Stay strong!