Icunurse29

UPDATE Hello all, thank you everyone for the kind words. I did manage to take some time off, and started to see a therapist. Although I am still working in the same place, I am considering a career change. My back gave out after I had a 340 LB patient and due to staffing shortage was lifting him myself. The next day I had a burning pain radiating down my left leg that left me in bed for 5 hours until I said *** it and just got it screaming... long story short it was sciatica and im getting an MRI to make sure it is not a herniated disk which is what I fear. I took this as a sign from god to go into either CRNA or go to medical school. Thanks everyone for your support, it made me better

Hello all, Im an ICU nurse employed in NYC who is very interested in the Anesthesia field. I did some research and the salaries vary from like 100k-500k for CRNAs. Are there any working CRNAs in the NYC or NY regions, who can maybe provide their salaries just so I have a good picture. Thank you

Dear Steven, I have began my nursing career at 2017 . When the pandemic hit I began having panic attacks and started smoking again when one night we had 24 patients in the ICU and only 5 nurses including the charge nurse. That night I had to suture a triple lumen because my resident was out coding a ***ing kid, out in an ng tube, and almost had to intubate a patient thank god respiratory came in just in time. Nursing is and always will be hard. But you know what makes it better? The crew you work with. Life just gets so much better if you find the right crew. It pains me to hear this from you brother because I would have ended up like you if it wasn't for my fellow ICU nurses who have supported each other when no one else would. People joke around on my unit that we're gonna leave to other higher paying hospitals but deep down inside everyone knows that , that extra $25,000 that they will pay us more will do nothing for the stress that will be put on us. Which brings me to you! You need to find a good team and stick with them, generally in the ICU the nurses are much closer bonded maybe you should try that. Also, I know you are here to help patients but how are you gonna help if you do t take care of yourself first. Understand this, you will always have a patient but there is only one of you. It is not your job to save everyone, it is your job to save those people who were assigned to you! I know that sounds grim and selfish but you are not a ***ing super nurse. Here is my advice if you see patients being neglected , kindly mention it to the nurse and if they snarked at you or say well why didn't you help them, explain to them you will not do their job for them! And if management gets involved you say I told the nurse and they ignored me. You have to speak up otherwise those nurses especially the female ones will eat you alive. I mostly like working with men female nurses most of them are just not nice and unbearable at times. Ladies don't get mad you know this to be true. My advice keep looking for that special place, and make sure there is a nurses Union this will help with management! PS I Loved working with Philippino, Korean, Russian nurses. Something about these cultures that just screams work ethic and integrity oh and no ***. They tell you how it is to your face!

Well I can do one of those crazy strong super evil laughs LOL

Haha. Thanks for the humor, made my day. I might just take you up on that offer. (also I’m a guy if that makes a difference XD)

I fell asleep yesterday at 9 pm woke up 12:39 and couldn’t sleep. After 3 -4 hours in the internet I tried falling asleep and I felt helpless going to work. I felt like there was only one way out, painless I mean I do have access to fentanyl so 1mg-2 mg IV or IM no pain just fade away. I wondered also if anyone would ever miss me? Did robin williams or Avicci feel the same way. I could feel pain deep down in my soul. Honestly the only reason I’m OK is because of video games , which I spent playing 8-12 hours on my off day. I need help.

Hello fellow nurses. I have worked in an ICU since 2019 in NYC. When Covid hit everything changed. I started hating my job, hating coming to work, getting panic attacks to the point where my mom had to give me some self prescribed Xanax. Which helped for a out a few hours, this was at 2 am and I ended up calling in sick to work. I’ve gained 60lb during this whole time, I find it harder to go to work everyday seeing all these hopeless cases all the 85 year olds coming in with DNR/DNI that get like 3-4 pressers and end up dying on my floor. Feels like the morgue. Granted we are not a trauma center but still. I honestly hate my job, I never thought I’d say this but I hate this job have 0 compassion for my fellow man, my knees hurt, my doctor just diagnosed me with severe morbid obesity class 2 ( didn’t even know obesity had classes , guess I just zipped pass class one straight to 2) with 41% BMI. I want to lost weight, and do one of two things . Either re-ignite my passion for nursing and continue with my dream towards CRNA or quit ICU all together for a different job. Please help, if you read this post something, anything, really, I can’t do this anymore.