kaliandr

I'm a new grad nurse and I'm actually still on orientation for 2 more weeks in a level 3 NICU. I have a history of anxiety and depression, and I've honestly never felt worse. I have a panic attack before work (sometimes during), and when I'm off, I can't stop thinking about going in. My stomach is constantly in knots and I have trouble sleeping. I've only been here about 10 weeks, but I have doubts that it will get any better for me. I feel so nervous around my preceptor, but I don't know if its me or her, honestly. I just feel like she's a bit harsh to me at times. I don't feel confident in anything that I'm doing and I just feel so stupid. Like I've never been to school at all. I've signed a contract to stay for 1 year, I'm trying to stick it out, but I'm so miserable. I've also thought about just staying until the end of the schedule (about 6 more weeks), seeing how im feeling, and if I'm still miserable I would start applying elsewhere or return to my old job. Do you think I'm giving up too easily? Does it get any better? Any words of encouragement?

I'm a brand new nurse (>1 year) and I work in an urgent care clinic. This woman came in and said her mother was just here and tested positive for covid and she started describing her to me and then without thinking, I replied back "I had a feeling because of the no taste and smell." Her mother also happens to be a nurse and now I'm really panicking about losing my license or getting fired. Has anything like this happened to any of you? What was th outcome?