JulietRN

@Maggiecbee hi! I had to reframe my perspective every day, and for every shift, but I managed to finish out my first year and then transferred units (still at the same hospital). I’m only 2 months in at the new job, but already amazed how different it is - in the best way possible. It’s a bummer this is such a relatable feeling for us new nurses, but I have learned from experience that it is survivable and there are better jobs waiting for you! If you can, stick it out through your first year- it will strengthen your resume, and more importantly, give you something to reflect back on. I say that with the caveat that no job is worth your mental health in the long run, so if you aren’t able to find relief to take care of yourself, move on sooner. Feel free to message me if you need!!

I appreciate the input, but this is a large teaching hospital with a program for new grads who start directly in the ICU. The learning curve will be tremendous, as will the responsibility associated with the autonomy level, but I know I’m ready to learn and I’m in a supportive place to do so. No matter when I go this would be true. I also have the discipline to study outside of work and the ability to know when I need to ask for help. It just took me a while to find the confidence to make the leap, but I’m confident now and I’m at least going to try applying for the position.

Thank you so much for the reply! And congrats; I am glad to hear you are happy! I actually job shadowed in the CVICU a few weeks ago and felt like that’s where I need to be - like my energy for nursing and learning was renewed. I submitted my application 4 days ago! ? best wishes to you & stay healthy!

it’s nice to know I’m not alone!! Thank you for sharing. I’m trying to hold on to the fact that I’ll be much more marketable with my first year of nursing behind me, and with this hospital on my resume, but it’s hard to look ahead at the next several months and anticipate the same thing I’ve been dealing with. I am diligent, but I am also human... and my mistake is being held over my head as a tool for taunting more than an opportunity for teaching. This has been unfortunate timing to be starting this career and have made a gigantic move in the midst of a global pandemic. Doable, but it’s testing my strength. Have to say I am still thankful to have job security, even though my current position is nothing like I expected it to be. I am leaning towards moving in a few months, but we’ll see how things go as it gets closer. I suppose we’re all learning what and where we “jive” in this field - I hope you find yours wherever you decide to go! Best wishes to you. Thanks for the input.

I haven’t started applying because my first year isn’t over for another 6 months, but there are fellowship positions posted in the specialty I am looking for (ICU).

I am currently in my first job out of nursing school, and am extremely unhappy with my unit. I love the specialty and my patients (for the most part), but I am completely drained by the unit politics and a passive-aggressive Staff Leader/charge nurse/“educator” who hovers over me and is repeatedly reminding me of my new nurse mistakes (none of which have caused harm). My unofficial “contract” is for two years (one of which I’m committed to the unit I was hired on to, then I can move to another unit in the hospital if I want for year #2). I say “contract” because I signed nothing, and many, many, many of the nurses on my unit transfer or leave the hospital entirely before the 1 year mark. The only penalty I’ve heard is that the hospital will not give me a recommendation, which is one of the big reasons I’m here to begin with. Some additional info... I moved across the country by myself to take this job. This is a reputable hospital and would help me get into grad school someday if I decide to go that route, and I was looking for a new big adventure. Well.. Coronavirus hit two months after I moved here, so I have been struggling to make friends, do not feel comfortable or safe going out to explore the city due to the pandemic, and am not connecting with anyone on my unit. I feel like I’m just working and hiding at home, alone, on my days off. I’ve been seeing a counselor but know that I am still fighting a deep sense of depression and regret. Because of all this, I want to leave this hospital at the one year mark and move back home/closer to home. I’m just scared what that’s going to mean for my resume. . My career is so new and I don’t want to make a bad decision, but my mental health is also important. I feel this is not an environment I can productively learn in because I am depressed, and because I feel unsupported by those who are more experienced/tasked with being my “educators”. I worked last night and felt I couldn’t safely approach any of the nurses without judgement, which happens often. Our patients are extremely sick, so I always ask anyways, but I leave feeling stupid and judged. My mistakes have also been brought up repeatedly, and my educator has gossiped about them so the entire unit knows (again, no one has gotten hurt). I understand wanting to enforce a point so mistakes aren’t repeated, but it’s getting to the point where I feel like I’m not allowed to move on and grow from them, if that makes sense. Like I’ve given them fuel to “attack the newbie” so now I’m stuck reliving it. if I do stay at this hospital, I will definitely transfer units at the end of the first year. But there’s a huge part of me that just wants to leave and go home. I don’t want to live my life feeling like this. But I also don’t want to damage the brand new career I worked so hard to achieve and feel that I could be really good at one day. Sorry for the long post. I’m a little lost. thanks for the input in advance.

Hi I have been a nurse since February of this year. I am currently working on a cardiac stepdown unit at a highly-ranked, high-acuity teaching hospital. It’s been a good experience so far - I love the patient population and how much I am learning, but the unit politics are already wearing me down (which I understand is likely present on every unit to some degree...). I’ve also always been the kind of person who looks for growth and the next challenge, so I’ve been trying to look ahead and decide what I want my next career step to be once my residency program is over in 8 months. I am very intrigued by the CVICU, but also scared because it is extremely high acuity. Not to say that other CVICUs aren’t high acuity... but ours is the hospital that patients are sent to in this region for the highest level of care. The CVICU nurses also have unique responsibilities and autonomy here that I’ve heard other facilities do not allow - incredible stuff, but also intimidating. I have always done well in school and have received high remarks from coworkers and managers since starting here. I also have prior medical experience as a medical assistant and scribe for 5 years before going to nursing school. I study outside of work because I enjoy learning and trying to become the best nurse I can be for my patients. My priority has and always will be keeping my patients safe.... and regardless of how hard I’m working, I‘m worried I am not smart enough to keep them safe in the CVICU here. So, my question is: is it normal to be worried about these kinds of things? Or is this a sign that I wouldn’t be a good ICU nurse?