RNeileen

I am not sure I have a choice either. Yes there is a disconnect I guess. I mean I haven’t done anything that was unsafe except for giving a patient NaCL instead of LR. My preceptor was upset but I made sure it didn’t happen again. And then there was a time when a patients’ blood pressures were reading low 74/50 and I rechecked it when I realized the cuff was loose and sliding off of the patients’ arm. It was just not good placement and I had to rechecked twice. My preceptor came running in and seemed upset and asked if I was watching the patients BP. I felt very dumb. Then there are times when we are running around like a chicken without a head and it is hard to watch fetal heart strips on the screens. A baby was having late decelerations during a few shifts and I was slow to catch it. But I was still catching on to how to monitor two babies at a time while performing care. I think I have gotten better at that I am just very slow about getting things done because I want to make sure I do it right. It’s just overwhelming.

Hi all, I really need some advice about a recent turn of events. I graduated as an RN in November 2019 and I started an L&D Residency Program on February 3, 2020. I am scheduled to start taking Patient assignments on my own next week. Anyway, I was assigned 2 preceptors for orientation. Both part-timers and both had a completely different way of doing things. It threw me off frequently during my training. Anyhow, I would be scheduled Wed, Fri, Sun as those were the only days they worked. When I first started I was extremely overwhelmed! I had no idea how much responsibility we have on an L&D unit. A lot of autonomy for sure. It is absolutely terrifying when I think about it. It is not until the very delivery of a newborn that the Physician steps in. For this reason, we are only allowed 2 laboring Patients per shift. At first, I thought it wasn't a bad assignment but I was sooooo wrong. Fast forward 12 weeks into my residency, management was hoping to have all RN residents start taking assignments on their own but my preceptors did not think I was ready. We hadn't gotten much time in actual deliveries and c-sections so they extended my orientation for 1 month. During this time, another preceptor was scheduled to train me. So now I had 3 different preceptors, 3 different ways of doing things, and lots of confusion. Two preceptors were super rough on me. They would reprimand me as if I were a child out in the station in front of other Nurses for silly things and I felt so small. They would pressure me to work faster and give me time limits when admitting Patients but then embarrass me when I missed something small like an admission question. They wanted me to work on accuracy but they would rush me through my work and I would become anxious and forget things. It was even hard for me to interact with the Patients and make them feel comfortable, otherwise I would be reprimanded for taking too long. For that extra month of training, I struggled with the documentation portion and I would stay after for about an hour to finish up. One of preceptors pulled me aside and said she didn't think I would be ready to take Patients and said she would ask for a 2 week extension. She made a comment about L&D not being the right unit for me. I went home crying that night. I felt like I was working as hard as could but I just wasn't doing enough. So I decided to work harder. They kept giving me super difficult assignments for the remainder of the orientation but I worked as hard and as fast as I could. I even helped some of the other Nurses. I was still having to catch up on charting after but my preceptors were NOT happy about it. They would go into my charts and look at every single piece of my documentation throughout my shift and I could almost see them shaking their heads in disapproval! In fact, I felt like everyone on that unit was shaking their heads in disapproval. Even the orientees! I just felt awful. Then yesterday, my last orientation day, my preceptor pulled the director of education aside and they sat in that office for about an hour. I just knew they were talking about me. After the end of shift, my preceptor basically told me that she did not think I was ready and that I should consider postpartum just to build my skills. She said, "think about it over the weekend and come back with a plan. Don't let management shove you around." I did admit to her that I was overwhelmed but I did not think I was terrible. I just felt pressured and I don't want to make mistakes. Any she truly believes I don't belong there and I am just devastated. I know I am a great Nurse, my Patients love me, and I have good Nursing judgement. They just keep saying that I am not SAFE and I need more work. I actually started thinking that maybe this career is not for me.. ANY ADVICE?! I'M JUST SO UPSET..