kawaiitears

So a week and a half ago I started a CNA training class at a local LTC, which is 4 weeks long and then I am assigned to a shift. So far, I've worked some on the floor, since Monday. The beginning of our second week began being able to work with mentors and start practicing our skills. (Not lifting, or using machines, just feeding, toileting, bathing, dressing, etc.) I really love working with residents, absolutely, it seems so rewarding, but aside from that, the whole aspect of the job seems so overwhelming and depressing. I know you're my supposed to think of it as depressing so I feel terrible. By no means, is a single resident I've met or taken care of has been a burden to me (even the ones who've swung and yelled at me.) I genuinely care for them and want them to feel good, and will do everything in my control to ensure that. It's just that everyone realizes how much I emphasize quality time with residents and it makes me kind of slow, because aside from that I'm insanely nervous, I'm scared of hurting someone, and everything is new to me and I lock up and forget everything when I get out there. Everyone tells me that if I'm already stressed I'm never going to make it on the floor and that I can't take so long. I don't work so fast. And that makes me feel bad. Is this not for me? I want to take care of people, but I'm having trouble. I broke down crying yesterday after a couple hours working on the dementia unit just because I feel helpless in caring for residents, I feel like I'm so terrible at it and I feel so terrible for them. I'm feeling a lot of things, I guess and I'm just overwhelmed at how to process everything. Should I just quit?