Mleilani

I really need some advice right now. I have been a nurse for 10 months now. I have been moved to a different cart recently and for the 5 days I was on there I made a med error all 5 days with a BP med. I confused the less/ more sign. It was if the systolic was under 120 to hold med. I thought the symbol meant more than 120 to hold BP med.....idk why I would think that but I did.......so I gave the BP med all 4 days and it was under 120 systolic. And I held it when it was 122 systolic. It is documented in the MAR so it was cought. I had made a previous med error before this. So my DON called me and told me about the error. I got suspended and they are going to make a decision to let me go or not. I feel horrible and like I'm a terrible nurse. Idk how I got the more/less symbols mixed up. I feel so stupid. I have been crying all day. Idk what to do or think.