RNAnony

When I started in the ICU, it was my dream job. I had worked at my current hospital for a year and a half as a PCA in the Float Pool so I was familiar with the ICU environment and pace. Part of my interview was shadowing for a few hours and I knew I loved it and the RN I shadowed gave me a great recommendation. My first concern is that my orientation is only 16 weeks. I'm at week 14 and I don't feel ready to be on my own. There are still general nurse things I'm not sure of (putting in orders, doc phone numbers, where things are in the equipment room, etc), I know I still technically have 2 weeks to get the hang of those things but my manager is pressuring me to leave my orientation ASAP, and she said she doesn't want to keep wasting money. I understand money is a concern but I don't feel safe practicing on my own yet. They warned me my night shift preceptor was a very blunt and honest person, and I am too so I wasn't too concerned. But I'm at my wits end now. My night shift preceptor is one of those people that just doesn't trust other people to do her job. She isn't happy with anything unless she's the one doing it. I have a lot of respect for her as a nurse but as her orientee I don't know what to do. She won't ever admit that she doesn't know something. She berated me for not getting a rectal temp on a patient who's platelets were 46. I will be trying to change my patients linens and she will rip everything out of my hand and make me step aside while she does it herself. So I came to my manager again just to let her know how that I feel worthless when I'm working because even though I know everything I'm doing is fine and the right thing, my preceptor will yell and have a fit over the smallest things. My manager told me to grow up, put my big girl panties on, and just deal with it. The turnover rate is so high that there are no other nurses to orient me because all the other night shift nurses are new. I guess my question is, should I look for another job? My orientation has been a mess. Half the time they don't even know I'm supposed to be there, despite multiple schedules being handed out. My orientation is the same orientation that people who have been nurses for 10+ years get. Should I find another facility that is better equipped to orient new grads?