catecna

Hi, everyone. I'd use an exclamation point but I'm currently bawling my eyes out. I took a CNA class in June through a technical college down the road. It was paid for by the county because I am part of an apprenticeship program. The biggest part of it is that I get to leave school an hour and a half early to go to work. I lined up a job with the best nursing home in town (it's like the Ritz Carlton for 86 year olds!) before I even started the class. I did my work orientation there and everything... they said I will be put on the schedule the moment I pass my CNA exam! Well, after working myself to death, giving up what was left of my summer social life, and waiting a month and a half after finishing the class (with a 98 average, may I add), I failed my CNA skills exam. Last night, I got home late (it was out of my control), then I had to wake up at 4:15 am this morning to drive 2.5 hours to the test site. Then I took the written part (passed, of course), waited for EIGHT AND A HALF HOURS (!!!!!!!!) and FINALLY took my skills exam with an equally jittery boy my age. I did everything flawlessly except for the bedpan skill. Those stupid gloves!!!! My brain went blank, and I just didn't think about changing gloves and stuff for an EMPTY bedpan and a clothed patient! Of course in a real situation, I would have perfect technique. I'm so angry at myself for making such a seemingly trivial but actually serious mistake. I was supposed to begin my training on the floor in 2 days, but now I have to call my boss and tell her that I failed. I'm so afraid that she is going to lose confidence in me. Also, I have to reschedule the test, and I might have to miss a day of classes to do it. This was my one and only goal this summer, and I failed. Big bold letters: F A I L. Like a punch to my snotty, puffy face. Thanks for reading. Can someone give me advice?