ulcia91

I graduated with my BSN in May and passed my Nclex late July. I always felt great about pursuing a career in nursing. I graduated cum laude and was inducted into the international honor society of nursing and took my studies seriously. However semester of fall 2017, I got burnt out. Like full thickness burnt out. I had personal issues with an injury, family and relationship stuff and I became really anxious at clinicals over a miscommunication with my preceptor and a mistake drawing meds stressed me out so bad. The mixture of everything going on in my life was too much and I got really anxious and depressed. It's a miracle that I finished school and finished with good marks in spite of how I felt. [/COLOR][/font] [COLOR=#000000]Fast forward to now and I just started applying. It took me months to recover from that stress and I avoided applying. My body and mind are just starting to heal. The problem is, its made me really jaded about nursing. I recently moved in alone and I know I need to start my career for the sake of my bills but I'm dreading feeling that stress again, and being afraid of making mistakes. I also feel really unconfident about my skills and haven't been in a clinical setting for a while and am worried about any sights of blood, venipunctures, etc making me woozy like they have in in the past. I am torn between feeling like I can do this and knowing I need to give it an honest chance and just wanting to quit altogether and find some other source of income. I am a strong and intelligent person but I do get really anxious sometimes and am really worried about looking totally incompetent among all the other fears I have including looking bad for graduating in May and still being unemployed as an RN. Advice?

I will be graduating from my BSN in just a few weeks, with my pinning ceremony coming up on May 5th. Since I started my prerequisities years ago, nursing was a passion of mine and I put my all into school (occasionally lazy of course). It was my pride and joy. Last semester, something really triggered my stress and anxiety in a med-surg clinical (trouble with a skill and miscommunication with preceptor, long story short). I do struggle with some anxiety issues, but since that event, I was extremely nervous for every clinical. This completely wore me out, and I couldnt snap out of the fear of making a mistake. Plus with the rigors of school and a stress CNA job (dementia care as a home health aide 40 hours in a row, day and night), I became burntout and stressed out to the max, and eventually depressed. Ever since then, even though this semester has been pretty much stress free, I have deeply been wondering if I made the right decision by going into nursing. I am really lacking motivation and do not feel the same passion I once did, I am in some ways not looking forward to a nursing career and have been slacking on finding jobs. I put so much work into this and I am so distraught that I feel this way now. I am praying I find my niche but even having the motivation to finds jobs has been brutal. Many people around me have jobs lined up already and I feel like I am the outsider who secretly is so jaded and just wants to go work at a grocery store or Starbucks for a little just to get a break from it all.