Lanap313

Hi, I am hoping to get some advice as I am very lost right now. I started working in L&D through a new grad program last April, so I am almost at my 1 year mark (6 month orientation, almost 6 months on my own). L&D is very fast paced, as many know, and at first I liked being thrown into the craziness going on. Now that I am coming on 1 year on the floor, I am still anxious before every shift, I am dreading going to work every day, and I am generally not enthused to be on this unit. I find myself lazy on my days off, sad and crying the day I have to go back with my mind going a million miles a minute trying to gauge whether its too early or whether L&D is just not for me. I am still on contract and now I feel like I have a duty to uphold, but at the same time I am miserable with not a great quality of life right now. Im wondering whether to as my manager if I could focus more on PP or wondering if I could ask to shadow in NICU and see if I enjoy it more. I am just SO lost and would love some advice. I appreciate you taking the time to read and help!