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Discussion

grades

I know I have posted on here before about my grades....but I consider that somewhat "anonymous". I worked really hard and just wanted to share with someone without being labeled a braggart/pompous.

BUT

What do you do when after EVERY single exam there is always those one or two classmates who want to know how you did (so they can compare or spread it to the rest of the class)? When I was in high school and my first degree, I never told people how I did. I started out this program that same way, but somehow I got sucked into discussing grades and feeling like I have to prove myself. It's gotten to the point where I have more anxiety in talking about my grades then I do about the exams themselves!

So, how do you excuse yourself from those types of conversations; especially when you are already sucked up in it (my fear, even though I know it doesn't matter what they think, is that if I don't comment, they will think I did poorly). I know I shouldn't care and call me insecure, but please also give me some advice!

Thanks!

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  • Experts

Tell them that you did well...or all right...or that you passed...or that you did better than you thought...or worse than you thought...or that you can't remember...whatever you like. And then drop the subject. You are under no obligation to tell them anything about your test grades that you do not want to. If they keep asking, repeat what you said and let it go. They will get the hint after a test or two...

And besides, who cares if they think you did well or not? The only person you have to prove yourself to is YOU. :)

But in all fairness, if that's the road you want to take...then you can't go pressing other people about their grades. I'm not saying that you do that, but just so both sides of the argument are represented: if you're going to press for numbers/letters from other people when you ask how they did on the test, you have to be willing to pony up yours for discussion.

Whenever I'm asked, I usually answer that I did all right and leave it at that. When I ask people how they did, I don't ask for specific grades--whatever they want to tell me is up to them.

I have no problems telling people what I got, although I try not to ask others how they did, unless they are my friends and I am genuinely concerned about them.

I do agree with you that sometimes people try to compete with you in terms of grade, and I try not to pay attention to them. I definitely believe that "i did well" is a pretty good response.

  • Author

I want to add that I NEVER ask ppl how they did....since I know it makes me uncomfortable, I don't want to put them in that same position. I think I'll just start saying "I did well" although I have one classmate that needles me for specific numbers. I guess I just need to grow a backbone :)

I tend to ask folks if they did as well as they wanted to...I do this intentially as everyone has different benchmarks as to what "doing well" is. If they hit their benchmark, I want to celebrate with them, if they didn't, I want to commiserate with them.

When asked how I did, I answer in the same way..."I did as well as I wanted to" or "I didn't do as well as I wanted to."

Unless they are friends that I study with, I don't generally mention what specific grade I got. If folks push for a number, I generally just repeat what I said already or add to it by saying "good enough" or "or not good enough."

I started doing this because I was tired of justifying why I was unhappy with a grade I received, even if others would have been happy with it.

After ever test I've taken so far (in my nursing class) there have been people who have asked how I did. If I did ok I'll tell them what grade I got. If I do better than ok (90 or above) I just say that I passed. I don't want to seem like I'm bragging.

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