Failed in clinicals

Okay so I'll try to keep what could be a very long story as concise as possible.

I started what should have been my last semester of AD nursing school on August 22nd, but on August 6th my life changed in a big way, and not for the better, and I didn't have time to get my head clear between then and starting the new semester. I already suffer from severe depression and anxiety, and going through extremely distressing circumstances just made everything tremendously worse.

I had done fair on clinicals on our 6 hour days - not great, but adequate, but after midterm we started doing 12 hour days and it just totally threw me off, and I just never could seem to catch up. I ended up making an error that did not result in patient harm but had the potential to be harmful, and it was a result of my anxiety clouding my thinking. This combined with my mediocre performance previously ended up getting me kicked out of the class.

I was supposed to graduate December 15th and now I'm not and it's pretty heartbreaking. I'm in a terrible financial bind and postponing my graduation is NOT going to help that, and it's extremely stressful, and I'm very depressed that I won't be graduating with a few really great friends I've made in this program, and I just feel like such a failure and like I'll never amount to anything... I'm trying to tell myself that it's just the depression talking and I'm trying to work through all of this.

Although I've dealt with some very difficult instructors in this program, I was very thankful for my instructors' attitudes as far as my situation. I was terrified about my meeting with them, but they were actually very considerate; they were honest and realistic, but in a tactful considerate way, and they seemed genuinely concerned for my mental health. They want me to take this time to really work on myself and take care of myself so that if I chose to return next semester I'll be in a place mentally that will allow me to be competent and not send me over the edge.

I think I probably will be returning next semester. I've had a lot of doubts about whether nursing is right for me. It's what I WANT to do, but I've had doubts about whether I'm capable of being the kind of nurse patients deserve. Even if I never hurt anybody, I just don't want to give anything less than excellent care. So the best plan I can come up with at this point is to do as my instructors asked and try to take care of myself and get better, and attempt the next semester in a better frame of mind, but if I still can't improve significantly, to call it quits and try to pursue a more appropriate career path for me. I won't try to force it if it's not working.

SO, my questions for you all are these:

• If you've ever failed for clinical performance did you repeat the semester, and if so, how did it turn out for you?
  
• Any advice for coping with my negative feelings about failing?
  
• If I do determine that nursing is not right for me, do you have any advice on coping with the feelings that that determination will bring about?
  
• *Most important* If I do return next semester, do you have any advice on improving my clinical performance? (prioritizing, time management, critical thinking, anything!)
  

One really upsetting thing about this is that I started the semester a little rocky, my first two tests were pretty bad, but I worked my butt off and I pulled my grades up, my grades actually ended up not just safe but actually good! I worked so hard and I was so proud of that, and I just never would have expected that I would be failed for clinicals. This is the first semester in the whole program that I have had problems in clinicals beyond the small things that all students have issues with, this is the first time I have not been on par with the other students, and it hurts. It's been hard all along, I've had to work with everything I've got to even get as far as I did, but I was proud of how far I'd come, and it just really hurts to have ended up here.