Decisions, Decisions...

Hi everyone, Let me just start by saying how much of a help Allnurses was when I was first embarking on nursing and nursing school. A true life saver, and anxiety reducer!

Anyway, here's my story: I had a background in foreign studies prior to starting my graduate entry program in nursing. I completed the pre-masters portion of the program in May and obtained my RN license in July 2013. I was hired for my first RN job at a Chicago ER where I had completed my Leadership rotation, and love/hated it.

The timing was rather... inconvenient: I started the graduate program the same week that i started on the floor (August 2013), and I had no car. Mind you, the ER is located in... the ghetto. Awful neighborhood = great ER experience.

Anyway, I quickly became overwhelmed at the ER, and having my boyfriend take me to and from work was incredibly stressful and taxing. So, I took an offer from a local community clinic where they were offering me flexible hours and a much lower stress environment. It wasn't 2 weeks after quitting the ER (Oct 2013) that i missed it-- mostly for the experience and partly because I was disappointed in myself for my lack of confidence that I could handle it all.

However, the clinic I currently work at is wonderful! It is lower stress, at least in terms of the urgency of things and acuity of patients, and I do have more energy when I come home from a day at the clinic vs a day at the ER. Being in my first 6 months of nursing, though, sometimes I feel like I'm not getting the experience I need, especially being that I am currently working toward my NP.

Well.. a few weeks ago, I emailed the ER director, telling her quite frankly, that I missed the ER experience and that she had "told me so". (She'd been very short with me when I announced my resignation.)

Today, I received an email from the ER director, stating "To be honest, I did want you to wonder whether you'd made the right decision, but not for this long.." She proceeded to offer me my position back, only it would be Nights and I would have to tell her of my plan as to how i was going to handle the ER and school.

Now.. I don't know what to do. I am trying to follow my gut, but I think my gut needs some random, impartial input. So, here's my plea. What do you all think? As new or experienced nurses, what is the best thing? Any input is appreciated! :)

Thank you All!