Criticism

I'm a new grad.

And I'm sure every nurse goes through this, but I just felt particularly disheartened by one of my coworkers.

It was my first day off of orientation, and flying solo was hectic, but not impossible. For the most part I felt as if I did a decent job, considering it was my very first day on my own. I did ask a lot of questions, and I'm sure that I'm irritating some of my co-workers by the frequency of new questions, but I always try to find the information for myself before I ask. (I'd rather look like a fool to my coworkers than harm a patient or lose my license!)

I gave report to the night nurse, and after i complete report on each patient, I always ask "Did I miss anything? Do you have any questions?" and I ask "How was report?" to make sure that I get some feedback. (And I've gotten some wonderful advice from young and seasoned nurses alike!) I always offer my help, because I know that I may not have caught everything. I always offer to correct any mistakes I may have made before I go and I sat charting for a long while (>1 hour) before going home.

The next morning I got completely chewed apart by the night nurse for things that I had forgotten. Like forgetting a soft-drink for one of the patients. Or forgetting to hang brand new IV bags so that the bags would be labelled and ready so the nurse could just switch over when the old bag went dry. Forgetting to put the gauge of the new IV into the computer. Etc, etc. However, the nurse kept interjecting between comments, "I know you learned this already." And "They didn't teach you to be this way in orientation." I was also accused of acting like a "know-it-all" that "doesn't bother to ask any questions," and told me that I was sloppy.

I understand that I may have made the nurse's shift a little more difficult, but I felt attacked, and I felt very defeated, and if she didn't demand that I don't cry, I may have very well sobbed in the break room.

Usually I take criticism with an open heart and mind, but I felt as if my request for feedback left an open invitation for personal attacks. My preceptor just told me to shrug it off, because all of the feedback was petty. She told me, "Everyone forgets to get a patient a soda once in a while."

I just felt really hurt by the nurse's comments, saying that I was a "know-it-all" and that my work is "sloppy." I know that I am very through (as much as a new grad can be, anyway!), and that I ask *plenty* of questions. I knew that nurses "eat their young" but I never imagined that it could shatter my self-esteem like this had.

I guess I just needed an opportunity to share the situation with folks who would understand. Fiancees try their best to understand, but it's just not the same as venting to a fellow nurse. Was this warranted? Am I overreacting? Bleh.