Lindasfriend

Thank you all SO much, you have no idea how valuable all of your insights have been. I appreciate you taking time to respond! I just want to say that I do not want to force treatment on her, I did hope they could sneak a shot of morphine in on her so that she could calm down again... and be able to think straight. If she wants to go home, I am all for it. She has no insurance, thousands of dollars in medical bills piling up for over a year (aneurysm included), and no way to ever pay for any of it. I know she is horrified, and it is horrifying to watch. I was just frustrated that she couldn't be given something to calm her down again... Yes, her first port got infected... they said it was very bad... they put another port in on the opposite side (of course), and then needed to take it out because the last round of chemo almost killed her, so the doctor doesn't want to give her any more chemo. He has now switched to radiation (which he said would not work at all in the beginning) Thank you all again so much...

Thank you so much for your replies. I, too, hope that she gets better. This is a very frustrating thing to watch, but I am certain more horrifying to be the one actually experiencing it. I have often thought that it might be a progression of the cancer in the brain, but wishful thinking makes me blame the steroid. I was frustrated today, because this has been going on for quite a while... she goes in and out of this paranoid state. I just wondered how long the hospital would keep her in a bed when she refused any and all treatment--yet she is paralyzed on one side of her body and will be home alone if discharged. That is the only reason I wanted them to SEDATE her... calm her down and give her a prognosis so she can make an informed decision on whether to continue treatment or not. I agree, I would not want to have meds forced on me either... but I would want to know if this was it as far as 'quality of life' goes... Thank you all so much for answering... this is an awesome source of information.

SANTHONY44: I understand... that does make sense now. I guess all I can do is feel sorry for everyone involved here... including and particularly those nurses by her side day in and day out... and hope that the situation improves. Hope she gets well enough to go home...

Thank you all so much for your wisdom! Her husband's company went bankrupt a year ago (the day she had a brain aneurysm--this woman has been through it!!!) So, they lost all medical coverage. She does not qualify for SS or Medicare, because the clerk at the agency told her 'she was 3 quarters shy(of work) of ever receiving benefits' But she gets SSI, because she has Scleraderma (KREST) & Lupus, so how can she qualify for one and not the other? Sorry to bother you all, but I have been reading many of the boards here, and you guys are very educated and helpful...

Okay, I understand that patients have the right to refuse meds/treatment. So the hospital has to just keep this patient in a bed and take verbal abuse? Until she dies? If she could get UP, she would probably hit someone.

I am desperately just trying to understand where legalities come in here... I mean, can't they force her to let them take out that port and then let her GO home?

Thank you for responding! We are in Missouri. Who would declare her 'incompetent'... her doctor?? her husband/family?? Some lawyer? I do not understand. She is paralyzed on the right side of her body, so if she goes home, she can't walk or get herself to the bathroom. Of course, she wants to go home... but there is no one there to care for her. Her husband has to work, and she has no children/family in town.

Thanks to anyone in advance, who takes time to respond. I am not a nurse, but currently persuading my oldest daughter to become one. My question: When does a medical facility say 'enough is enough' and discharge a terminally ill patient--or lock her up and force meds on her! I have a friend that has been diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma with a tumor in the brain. Diagnosis was 3 months ago and she was told it was inoperable. She was also told that radiation wasn't an option because it was so deep in the tissue. She was given radical chemotherapy treatments immediately (two rounds) using Methatrexate. Here is the problem... she is also on Decadron, and it is making her nuts. Three different times now, she has gone ballistic claiming everyone is out to get her. She screams/cusses/yells at the nurses and doctors. I have witnessed this myself, and I do not understand why she is not placed in a psych ward. She is now coming off another 'episode'... she refused any and all meds, her radiation treatment (they can't give her chemo anymore), and refused her 'surgery' to remove her port. She will not talk to anyone on the medical staff... thinks everyone (including her husband)is involved in some conspiracy to keep her locked in the hospital. Sorry so long... but this woman is going nuts in a hospital where she has been treated for 3 months with no insurance. WHY WON'T SOMEONE force meds on her??? Her husband has POA, but was told that it means nothing, as long as she is 'competent'. My 3 yr old neice could tell you SHE IS NOT COMPETENT right now.

Thanks to anyone in advance, who takes time to respond. I am not a nurse, but currently persuading my oldest daughter to become one. My question: I have a friend that has been diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma with a tumor in the brain. Diagnosis was 3 months ago and she was told it was inoperable. She was also told that radiation wasn't an option because it was so deep in the tissue. She was given radical chemotherapy treatments immediately (two rounds) using Methatrexate. Here is the problem... she is also on Decadron, and it is making her nuts. Three different times now, she has gone ballistic claiming everyone is out to get her. She screams/cusses/yells at the nurses and doctors. I have witnessed this myself, and I do not understand why she is not placed in a psych ward. She is now coming off another 'episode'... she refused any and all meds, her radiation treatment (they can't give her chemo anymore), and refused her 'surgery' to remove her port. She will not talk to anyone on the medical staff... thinks everyone (including her husband)is involved in some conspiracy to keep her locked in the hospital. Sorry so long... but this woman is going nuts in a hospital where she has been treated for 3 months with no insurance. WHY WON'T SOMEONE force meds on her??? Her husband has POA, but was told that it means nothing, as long as she is 'competent'. My 3 yr old neice could tell you SHE IS NOT COMPETENT right now. I have so much respect for those nurses that continue to take her abuse, that must take strength and dedication.