1 Year Since Graduation & Still No Job! Now Expecting First Child! :) Advice

[applejacks36]

I need some advice from all our wonderful nurses out there.

As my title entails I graduated in December of 2011 with my BSN. I searched high and low for a GN residency position. I was contacted by 4 hospitals total (2 hospitals were just narrowing down thier 1,000 applicants, and I was honored to be at the very least be contacted), I went on 2 interviews (kind of), and still no job. I live in Houston TX. It's very competitive here, and more hospitals each semester seem to be limiting their GN internship residencies due to budget cuts. One hospital even turned me away within 2 minutes of the interview, because I had graduated 6 months earlier than the newest new grads. I was told that I had missed my opportunity and that they weren't looking to hire "old" new grads. Still a sore spot for me, but I digress.

A month later after the you're an "old" new grad therefore we don't want you nonsense, my husband and I discovered that we were pregnant! :) We of course are extremely thrilled, and can't wait to become parents! What makes it even sweeter is that my due date is April 19, 2013, with April 19 being my birthday too. Talk about the best birthday gift EVER!

The part that I struggle with ethically is whether or not to apply to GN Residencies that start in January 2013. My husband and some trusted former professors have said "Yes! Apply!" Since I've already got turned away from one job because I was a "old" new grad, my husband is afraid that if I wait to apply for jobs till after the baby is born that I will have NO chance what-so-ever in finding anything. Therefore, I have put in some applications for the January 2013 internship season. However, every time I hit the submit button I begin to panic. What if I actually get called in to interview?!? ! I am now 14 weeks pregnant, and my baby bump hasn't begun to show quite yet. So, I could make it through an entire interview without an interviewer knowing that I'm hiding a HUGE secret. However, make no mistake that when I show up for my first day of work come mid January, I'm going to look every bit the 27-28 weeks pregnant that I will be.

What will my DON and manager say? What happens if they say I really don't have any of the integrity I actually spoke about in my interview by not disclosing how pregnant I was from day one? What happens to my maternity leave seeing as FMLA won't apply to me? Will I be expected to be back on the job within 2-3 weeks after giving birth because I won't yet qualify for maternity leave? Let's face it 2-3 weeks isn't even enough time to stop my postpartum bleeding, figure out breastfeeding schedules, or properly bond with my new baby. This is why I'm so torn over this! My husband tells me that they legally will have to accommodate me and work something out. I'm not so sure about that. True, they won't be able to legally fire me, but they could make my life so miserable that it forces me to quit.

If I get an interview, should I be upfront with them from the beginning and disclose my pregnancy? This may lessen my anxiety over what will happen when they find out come January. Since I am already licensed I thought maybe I could convince them to let me start a little earlier than the rest of the group. That would ensure that I had plenty of time to accomplish my preceptorship before the baby arrives. I'm torn because full disclosure of course places me at a higher risk of not being hired at all. Who really wants a pregnant lady in her third trimester trying to figure out nursing, only to have her go on maternity leave a few months down the road. If I were the hiring manager I would choose a different candidate for sure.

What are some of your thoughts? Keep applying and go on interviews (if I'm asked to of course), or wait till after baby arrives? In an interview, keep pregnancy to myself, or full disclosure? I know I don't have to legally disclose this information, and they can't legally ask. So that's not the type of answer I'm looking for. This is more of an ethical dilemma for me. What is the ethical thing to do in this situation?

Thanks all for reading this long post, and any input wouldbe greatly appreciated.

[Double-Helix, BSN, RN]

First, congratulations on your pregnancy! I just had my daughter 7 weeks ago, and there is nothing better than being a mommy.

You're definitely in a tricky situation. Since you won't qualify for FMLA, your maternity leave will probably be limited to the six weeks of medical leave that you will receive for childbirth (8 weeks if you have a cesarean delivery). You should be able to google the laws in your state and find out exactly how much time off you can receive and what your rights are.

Financially, can you afford to not work until after you have your baby? I'm very fortunate to have just over 4 months off with my baby, and I can't image having to go back to work after only 6 weeks. If you can afford it, I would recommend taking the time off, because bonding and caring for your baby is so much more important than rushing back to a job.

But there is certainly no harm if you keep applying in the meantime. Even if you are given an interview and offered a job, it doesn't mean you have to accept the job if you have decided that you would rather be able to stay home with your baby for awhile. Any interview could be good practice. I wouldn't limit yourself to just new grad residencies either.

Best of luck, and congratulations again!

[applejacks36]

Thank you Ashley! We are very excited to become parents! :)

Thankfully, my husband's salary provides very well for us. Therefore, it was never a necessity for me to work. I think I would enjoy working, and the second income would always be nice.

My husband and I attended college together (I earned a psychology degree first). We graduated, got married one week later, and moved to Houston for his career. I was a stay-at-home wife in a brand new city with the opportunity to become anything I wanted, and a husband who supported my career aspirations. After debating grad school for an advanced degree in Psychology or a bachelor's in nursing, I chose nursing. After 4 years of hard work and dedication, I graduated nursing school, and shortly after was a newly licensed RN. Therefore, I want all my time, educational commitment, and hard work I have put into earning both my Psychology Degree, BSN, and RN license to actually pay off at some point. Even though I don't need to work, my husband would be disappointed if I didn't try to pursue my career in nursing, seeing as non of that education was cheap.

We did talk tonight, and we decided that it would probably be best for me and our family to wait to apply for jobs till after the baby is born. I know I will want plenty of time with my baby, and would just be miserable when leaving my very new baby to go to work. Maybe, summer of 2013 will be my time that my career can get off the ground. Becoming a successful mommy is just more important to me right now. :)

I do have to admit that I really hate that women have to make the decision to raise a family, or have a successful career. Men are never faced with these ethical dilemmas. It's never a problem for them to have a successful career and be a father. I can't wait till the day that true equality in the workplace exists for us women.

[jomajoma]

I am actually in your situation right now. I graduated may 2011. Took a break from getting my license, because I got married a couple months after and had to move from ny to nj into my hubby's house. After I finally got my license, I had no luck in nj or ny trying to get a job. Then my husband hits me with a whammy telling me that he accepted a job transfer to dallas! We moved in may and i had only 1 interview, which I ended up not getting. Then surprise, we are pregnant! So just earlier this month, out of the blue I get contacted to interview for a residency that I applied to in may. I was scared because like you I had the same question. But I decided to go, and they hired me on the spot! I am starting this monday, and I am 18 weeks!! I am still not showing yet, but I plan to tell my manager in the next 2 weeks. Im scared to, but I have to come clean at some point.

Congrats on ur pregnancy. Its a wild ride, but I wouldnt trade it for the world!

[Zyrasmom]

I am actually in your situation right now. I graduated may 2011. Took a break from getting my license, because I got married a couple months after and had to move from ny to nj into my hubby's house. After I finally got my license, I had no luck in nj or ny trying to get a job. Then my husband hits me with a whammy telling me that he accepted a job transfer to dallas! We moved in may and i had only 1 interview, which I ended up not getting. Then surprise, we are pregnant! So just earlier this month, out of the blue I get contacted to interview for a residency that I applied to in may. I was scared because like you I had the same question. But I decided to go, and they hired me on the spot! I am starting this monday, and I am 18 weeks!! I am still not showing yet, but I plan to tell my manager in the next 2 weeks. Im scared to, but I have to come clean at some point.

Congrats on ur pregnancy. Its a wild ride, but I wouldnt trade it for the world!

Hi,

I just got hired as a new nurse, and am super excited. I'm.3 weeks pregnant, and afraid that once I return from Maternity leave, I won't have a job because I doubt qualify for FMLA, I'm thinking I will spill the beans when I'm.showing, anf kudd up to the DON, tell her I want to keep my job, love the place, etc.....any suggestions? Thanks and congrats!

[applejacks36]

Update: Sadly this no longer applies to my original post. I went into preterm labor with my son at 22 weeks, and despite our best efforts, we lost him. Thank you for all those that gave me advice on the pregnancy and finding a job front. Unfortunately, I still have no job, and now no baby. :''(

I'm still hoping for the best for those of who are Preggo, and in a job. Zyrasmom, just tell your DON when you feel comfortable telling. They can't fire you for simply being pregnant. They will have to work something out for you. Best of luck to you!!

[serenitylove14]

I am sorry for your loss.