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We want to add to our family

Recovery   (505 Views | 3 Replies)

1 Follower; 4,011 Profile Views; 147 Posts

Hello all,

This all started for me five years ago... We have always planned on having another child but I couldn't bring myself to go through that while waiting to hear from the board, job hunting, or the first year. I have less than a year and am considering trying for our next child. 

What I DONT want is telling doctor about this *&#%*&^ while I sit there ashamed and mortified. 

Do I have to tell them? Only if medications are prescribed?? Meds during pregnancy are more lenient than what I am allowed now. Hello benedryl...

I would deliver at least two months after ending this nightmare (baring any issues/delays/false positives) or longer depending on how long it takes to get pregnant. 


I am so fed up with this controlling my life. 

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catsmeow1972 has 15 years experience as a BSN, RN and specializes in OR.

2 Followers; 1,215 Posts; 14,196 Profile Views

My contract required me to give them the names and contact info for my PCP, my pharmacy and there was instructions that ‘I should inform all my providers that I am enrolled in this mess.” I had given them the current PCP info, but I moved within a few months of it beginning, changed docs and then again several times throughout the sentence. Never did I update that info and to my knowledge, nobody ever questioned it. I had specialists for a few things and I never said a word about it. There was once instance where I went to urgent care for what turned out to have been a back spasm. I know damn well the PA there didn’t have time to listen or care what the story was. I  had declined the Rx for pain meds but that had zero to do with the program and more because I knew I needed a muscle relaxer more than anything.

Maybe the point of informing providers is to lend credence that people ‘like us’ (whatever that actually means) can’t be trusted and we should warn providers to not prescribe stuff we’re not allowed. Frankly, I think that’s a load of manure. The generic rules of these programs seem to be that one informs the program that one will be in need of verboten medications in advance of taking them, for elective surgery for example. Okay...well fine, if I have a legit need for something that will trip a drug test, than sure I’ll say so but if whatever I am doing (having done) doesn’t involve anything that will do that, then it ain’t their business when I get my dental work done or my lady parts check up. To me, it’s another attempt at control and reminding us of the stranglehold on the lives of contractees.

Perhaps, for a person in recovery, that may be at risk of relapse, that there may be a concern of ‘doctor shopping’ I guess is the phrase, this might be a useful idea but as a wholesale policy for all comers, Nope, I didn’t sign away my right to privacy and dignity.

My personal advice...(just me here, not to be construed as telling anyone what to do)... when you get pregnant, pick your OB, drop a note to the program telling them as such and leave it. Have a healthy, uneventful pregnancy and when you deliver, inform program as such, send them documentation of what you may have been given. As far as disclosing this to the doc...if YOU are comfortable disclosing your history, then let that be your choice. If your history doesn’t impact your current care, then don’t but do not feel the need to say it because some faceless program demands (or thinks they can) it.

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KyBeagle has 27 years experience as a ASN and specializes in ED RN and Case Manager.

114 Posts; 1,340 Profile Views

I’m not sure about all states. In Ky’s KARE program, no, you would not have to notify your OB/GYN unless they specifically are prescribing meds (or recommending an OTC Med). 

When I was in the program, my PCP was aware from day one, as I am on a routine maintenance medication. 

Partway through my contract though,  I fractured a bone. I received pain meds in the ER & an ER doctor signed KARE’s required paperwork when prescribing narcotic medication. A week later, I had an ortho follow up, with an orthopedic MD notoriously moody. I dreaded giving him a copy of my KARE contract & getting a signature, but did so to ensure I was being compliant. I was quick to assure him that I did NOT need any further pain meds as I had switched to OTC NSAIDS by that point anyway. The next day, I emailed my CM with an update (no surgery required) & mentioned that I would soon be faxing the ortho MD’s signed form. She said that she didn’t require it, as he hadn’t prescribed any meds. 

Rereading my contract, I realized that I had misunderstood that point. And I was sooo disappointed that I had notified that surgeon- for nothing! 

That said- if you were to have severe nausea requiring meds, or even need an antibiotic that was prescribed by OB, they would have to be notified. It may be more awkward telling them later on —-but I totally get where you’re coming from. 

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1 Follower; 147 Posts; 4,011 Profile Views

Thank you both for you responses. I agree totally with what you had said. I am timing this so I will deliver at least two months after this hell ends, probably more unless its a one month try situation! 

I had actually reached out to my 'case manager' about what would happen when I deliver should I do this now and get selected. "you are required to submit a sample" was her response. I swear they don't even read our questions. So I could be in labor, literally pushing a human out and have to find a way to get to a lab? I decided to just wait an extra year and a half. Who cares if my eggs are getting old and decrepit right? 

Every healthcare provider I have told this to has been compassionate and so kind. I just want to go through pregnancy without feeling judged and get the same care I would as anyone else. 


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