Two goals...tick tock

[aspiringnurse8]

Hi all,

So, I'm getting married in 60 days YAY:loveya:! I've wanted to be a nurse since before I can remember, I've always loved helping people, its what I do best. At the same time, I've also always wanted to be a mother, I lost my mom to Breast Cancer when I was 5 yrs old, so having kids of my own is a HUGE dream of mine. I'm currently (well not over the summer) taking my prereqs for the nursing program I'm hoping to get into, and I have my fair share of panic attacks and tears because of the stress...but what gets me most is this timeline I have in my head - I'm turning 29 in about a month, and I want SO badly to be pregnant in a year or two, but I fear that if I dont push through these classes and get my degree, that I'll just lose momentum or take a 'break' that will last years. Then another part of me is - well I can get my degree at any point, but my biological clock will tinker out sooner or later. I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else out there is in the same boat, and if so, how do you deal with it?

Thanks for reading. Happy studying :)

Aspiringnurse8

[sbenning5]

Well, first off ((((HUGS)))) to you. I'm not in the same boat really but wanted to say hi and I hope someone has some advice for you.

[ExpatHopeful, LPN, LVN]

Hey there aspiringnurse8,

I can totally sympathize. I just turned 28 and am applying this fall for a three year NP program. If I get in (a big if) I'll be 32 when I finish. I've been married 3 years now and kids are definitely in our plan, but I'll have to work for at least a year after I graduate before taking time off to have kids so that puts me at 33?? It's older than I imagined myself becoming a mother at and all the fear mongering in the media about declining fertility doesn't help me relax about it.

I guess I find comfort in the fact that my mom was 36 when she had me and a ripe 44 when she had my brother and we both turned out okay. Also it's really important to me that I have my nursing degree before I have kids so that if anything were to happen and I were to be left as a single parent I know I could support them and give them a good life. That definitely motivates me to do my nursing degree before starting a family.

Having said that it doesn't mean I don't wish that it had all worked out a little differently!

Congrats on getting married and enjoy your time as a couple together. One thing that being married without kids has taught me is that it's a lot of fun just having the time to enjoy your partner without the responsibilities of parenthood. Weekend mornings are still blissful for one thing!

[hiddencatRN, BSN, RN]

I'm 27 and getting married in August. My goal is to be through nursing school by the time I'm 30 (which means getting in to nursing school on the first try, and doing an accelerated program rather than the much more affordable CC). Sometimes I get the "must have baby now" urge, but I also really want to have time to enjoy married life AND to pay off some of my debt before having kids.

My mom had all of us at 30, 35 and 37, and my aunt had 3 kids after 36, so I'm fairly confident in my inherited fertility. I think I would be very sad if I'm not able to have biological children, but I'm very open to the idea of adoption, so I'll make it happen one way or another.

But the timeline stresses me out too. I really wish I was doing this even 2 years younger, but I wasn't ready to dive back in to school after graduation.

I've been trying to relax with my timeline- there are just so many factors that are out of my control, that it's energy better spent to get good grades, enjoy my life and crank out a killer application essay.