summa cume laude fails NCLEX 2x- it's not about IQ

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Hi everyone,

I just wanted to let people know that I was an A student in school and I graduated with highest honors. I worked my butt off to be at the top of my classes, and was even granted the opportunity to co-teach classes and head my own fully funded research team. It was very humbling and terrifying to go into the NCLEX feeling as if everything I had ever worked for was on the line and fail, and then fail again. Not to mention I was a single parent, so I had my children depending on my passing. The magnitude of these failures had a huge impact on my emotional well being. I did every single review book imaginable. I KNEW the material and I could perform at home and in review courses, despite people claiming that maybe I didn't know it as well as I thought. After two failures, and reading some of the absolutely ridiculous forums on here from fellow nurses saying that they wouldn't want to be cared for by someone who had failed the NCLEX more than 2x, I decided to leave nursing all together. I literally stopped studying for months and my anxiety subsided over time as I came to terms with my new decision. I felt horrible though. Not to point fingers (but not that you can help it at that point), but I started thinking about all the people in my nursing program who barely squeaked by, and cut every corner to get ahead, and yet still passed on the NCLEX on their first try. I started wondering to myself if I'd really want those people caring for me in the hospital. So, on a whim, and on the continued pressure of friends and family, I decided to try again. I went into the NCLEX and literally gave it my best/weakest effort. I know that must not make sense, but I think that not seeing myself as a nurse, really helped me forget what I had to lose. To my complete and utter surprise, and contrary to what the review classes warned, I passed.

I wanted to share this story for two reasons. First, anyone out there who has failed must know that the NCLEX is NOT a reflection of your intelligence or ability to be a good nurse. I know plenty of nurses out there who really shouldn't be in the field and they passed on their first time and they are terrible with patients and make many mistakes on the job. I am not discrediting those who are great nurses and have passed on the first time, but I just think that the NCLEX itself doesn't "make" the nurse per say.

Secondly, the one thing I regret in how I did everything was that by losing confidence in myself and walking away from nursing, I made it extremely difficult to come back to it after I passed. I had a lot of thinking to do and it was a hard decision to come to. If I could do it all over again, I wouldn't have let the things I did bother me and I wouldn't have walked away.

For anyone out there who hasn't passed, I am truly sorry. Please know that there are plenty of nurses out there who will always support you and know that you are much more than an exam, which hardly represents all that you covered and worked for in nursing school. If you can, try not to make the mistake I did in walking away from it. It has taken a lot of hard work for me to come back to it and believe I can do it, and now I think I am an amazing nurse. It's a great thing I came back!

-Kep1

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I absolutely believe test anxiety can have a profound effect on test results. Glad you decided to give it another try. Welcome to the world of nursing.

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very inspirational..thanks for sharing this wonderful story. i have failed once and is planning to take it again.. i too have thought about it several times of walking away. i feel like i am in a pressure cooker sometime, but after reading this it made me feel better...thanks again!

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I think the NCLEX evaluates the way a person thinks, not their intelligence.

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Hi. I just took the NCLEX-RN today and although I am aware that it is normal to feel as though I have failed, I am beyond certain that I have. I, too, was very successful in school and regarded as someone who couldn't possibly have any worries with any exam, let alone passing with a minimum competency. When I stepped out of the test center today I could barely breathe. I kept thinking over and over how difficult it was and it nearly brought me to tears. The next thought I had was how humiliating it will be for me to admit to my friends, family, and classmates that I failed. I can already see the shock and pity on each of their faces when they hear the news.

I have always had significant test anxiety, but never did it affect me the way it did today. With each new question, I could literally feel my blood pressure rising. With each new question I found myself spending more and more time just reading it over and over, only to realize I could not remember what I just read. Even now I cannot remember focusing on the key words in the stem like MOST, FIRST, PRIORITY, LEAST... In selecting my answers did I even know what I was being asked? I simply cannot remember.

I studied like crazy for this test. I felt confident going in that I had all of the knowledge necessary to conquer the task. But as the test went on, I realized all of the studying I had done was in vain. I don't know if I was just unlucky and received a block of questions specifically from my weak areas, or if I just couldn't get past my anxiety to utilize my critical thinking skills. Whatever the case, I am now just trying to deal with the fact that I more than likely will have to take it again.

My whole point in sharing this is that I want you to know how your post has brought me back to life after being in utter despair for the last ten hours. My main concern until reading it was how disappointed I would feel if people would view my failure as a reflection of how intelligent I am or my ability to practice as a nurse. I worked so damn hard to get to this point and for all of it to culminate in failure on a 75 question exam was just unbearable. But you have given me the strength to give it another go. So thank you for your insight and advice. And congratulations to you!!!

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Still-in-shock....I know exactly what you felt/are feeling currently. I too was a good student in nursing school and made very good grades. I FREAKED out when I took my NCLEX on Jan. 26. I finished at 75 questions in 35 min. and also didn't feel like I was paying attention to the question. I had my husband and family prepared for my failure as soon as I could get myself together enough to call them after walking out of the test center. It is so natural to feel as if you failed. I found out exactly 48 hours that i had passed. Do not give up hope...just read the success stories on this site and it will help you to remain sane during the wait. I wish you the best of luck and please post to let us know how it turns out!

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Thanks for giving me hope. I already tried 3X and still didn't make it. And with that, I'm already discouraged. After reading you message, I want to give another try to myself again.

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Minidoxiemama-thank you for your story and encouragement. I have literally been glued to these posts since I came home yesterday. (I just woke up five minutes ago and I am on here!:)) 24 hours 30 minutes and counting since I began that horrible exam. Part of me just feels silly to be waiting so impatiently for the results. I mean I already know the outcome, right? :innerconfBut I guess there is still a part of me hanging on to that shred of hope.

I have already found out everything I need to know to retake the test. I am currently working as a GN precepting for a job that I was so excited to get. The specialty I want and with people I already know. But my husband has encouraged me to quit the job to concentrate on the next attempt if I don't get good news tomorrow. The thought of quitting the job is heart-wrenching, but the thought of working there as a PCA and trying to concentrate on studying for the next time is unimaginable. In fact, I will be working tomorrow when I think my results will become available. I just don't want to face the questions I'll be asked about how it went. Man, I can feel my heart pounding just thinking about it!

Anyway, thanks again! And I will definitely update on my results. The forums have encouraged me a little bit, but I feel like that will make the bad news seem that much worse (in the event that I receive bad news). Pass or fail, I gotta keep it real, right?

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Test anxiety is an awful thing.

In nursing school, my class was under so much pressure from a cruel instructor who made it a personal goal to flunk everyone she could (she got 16 out of 25 in one block.)

It was a nightmare and you never knew what the crazy woman would put on her exams. She said she could get questions from anyplace - including the internet or her head. She didn't lecture, just told us to read the books - front to back and know it all.

The pressure just about killed me twice. The first time, I sat there reading each ridiculous question after the next, and knew there was no way to pass that test, even though I had studied hard for it. By the time I handed the test in, I was crying.

Everyone in the class failed that test, and had to be given points to pass.

Another time, there was a pass/fail math calculations test and I was the only person in the class to fail it. The reason? I was so stressed out, literally had myself worked up into a frenzy thinking about how humiliating it would be to flunk out at that point - over one bad test.

I had one re-take opportunity and studied for a solid week. It was horrible. Of course, I passed, but I wouldn't want to live that week over again.

It's those of us who really care that become so nervous and anxious during tests. Make or break tests / pass/fail - aren't really fair, in my opinion.

I take the NCLEX next week. I have been studying for over 6 weeks now, and several people from my graduating class have told me they haven't studied at all. I am fairly confident in my preparations for the test, but I know that passing depends on my staying calm.

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still-in-shock...I hope you get the good news you so want to hear tomorrow. When I left my test I too was so sure that I had failed b/c I didn't feel like I knew any of the answers, I sped through the test b/c I was in a panic, and what set me off was that I couldn't sleep the night before the test...I got 1.5 hrs of sleep. It's good to prepare yourself and your family...but still hold on to some hope because you STILL COULD PASS even though you feel like there is no way possible! Good luck to you!

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reading your stories, and reflecting on my experience makes me think that maybe nursing knows that we are cut for it...just that it demands more from us than the usual so we can show who we truly are...

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Thank you Minidoxiemama! I think I will be okay if I don't (It isn't feeling like it will be the end of my life anymore! :)). But if I do, then I will feel like a really lucky gal! I'll keep you posted!

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